Sorry but I can't afford Xmas and going into debt over it sucks?

Question

Not willing to use credit cards this year, sorry people! I've really cut down on our list over the years to just close family members, but still it's so expensive. Sorry but we don't get bonuses for xmas. I did at a job a long time ago! I am a SAHMom and we live off one income but we wouldn't qualify for anything either b/c we make TOO much money so don't offer me those ones!

I'm also tired of getting crap for xmas like wow I need another batch of stale cookies, or stinky bubble bath from a cheap store. Sorry but I'd rather have my family members take all that money and help someone that's starving somewhere. I don't want crap, I'll just give it away then. If we are all to poor to not give what we really want to give like vacations and trips to the spa, can't we just forget it?

Answer 1

I congratulate you on your decision to skip using the credit card for Christmas. Four years ago we started doing Christmas on cash. It isn't as glamorous but it doesn't follow us into the next year either. Now we put a little money aside from every paycheck into an account and work up a budget. We have two little kids and are single income, I stay at home. Yet, we manage to have fun every year. Part of the reason is that we moved away from "comsumer mentality" and put thought into what would make Christmas special to us. We started traditions, we took time to enjoy each other and the season around us, we emphasized our religious beliefs and de-emphasized the "stuff".

This year, I'm making lip gloss and the kids are making calendars, and we'll give out pumpkin bread to the neighbors. For the stuff we buy, our goal is to buy things that emphasize family time--books, puzzles, creative gift baskets that show we really thought about the person not just bought something out of obligation. For the kids, we give them each 3 presents--a pair of pjs, a middle-sized present like a game and a large present like a bike. We shop early and look for good deals and make sure present time on Christmas morning is slow, fun and that we all get to play with everyone else's gift. :)

Also this year, we are looking at buying something from Hefer International as a gift from our family to a family in need. It is an organization that allows you to donate the cost for a needed animal for a family in a third world country to improve their life (buy a chicken, a milk goat, a farm ox, etc.). I don't think there is anything wrong with asking that any money someone would usually spend on a gift goes toward a charity of your choosing.

I hear how frustrated you sound. I hope for you that you can use that to make a great change in the way your family does Christmas. You don't have to give up or give in, do something different and wonderful this year!

Answer 2

I see you already have that holiday spirit warming your heart and its not even Thanksgiving yet. Don't open the gifts you receive take them to the nearest shelter and donate them. Some woman and their children might not make too much money and appreciate stale cookies or stinky bubble bath. In case no one told you ITS THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS. I hope you don't hurt anyones feelings this season. What do you do when your kid gives you something thats not up to your standards. I think you need to go watch How the Grinch Stole Christmas and then watch Its a Wonderful Life maybe they might renew your spirits.

Answer 3

I feel the same way as i enjoy an awesome credit score but at $7k in revolving debt just to live in this economy is killing me. Now i realize some would think thats nothing however its tough going with a family of 5 right now. Dont dwell on it though...go through the holidays with the happy face and try and get into the spirit of it all. We will be better people to the family and the kids if we do things inexpensively but tastefully as we can. And youre right...if you cant do things well dont bother. Honestly though people dont think of it like you and i...i think maybe they use that crap or its part of their own twisted spirit. Happy holidays :)

Answer 4

Gracious you are in a mood aren't you. I however understand, I don't have alot of money either and I don't have credit cards either.

Tell your friends and family that you'd like them to donate to a charity in your name , one they know you'd support.

However if someone still wants to give you a gift, even if it's one you don't like , accept it gracefully, because it's their right to give you a gift if they choose to and it'd be bad manners on your part to refuse.

If you actually do hate it , then donate it to a women's shelter or a charity that could use the item.

Or you could write short notes to people in lieu of gifts thanking them for being a blessing in your life and telling them how grateful that they are there.

Many people value this far more than any amount of money someone could spend because it indeed comes from your heart .

And I hope you have a wonderful holiday season and receive many blessings not just at christmas but throughout the year.

Answer 5

I can see your point, but you seem to have a real bad attitude in general.A gift is a gift regardless of whether you want it or not, or even like it. I'm sure you've given crap presents at some stage.
Why not make up some vouchers? Eg...for your mum an hour of ironing, for someone else and hour of pulling out weeds in the garden etc. That way it costs you nothing and you get to spend time with the people too. Last year my brother mowed my lawn for me for christmas. I'm a single mum, and it's a job I hate, so I thought it was great!

Answer 6

You don't have to do anything you don't want to do. We've cut our list down to 6 people this year...immediate family only. We used to buy for 40 people. We didn't spend a lot and I made quite a few of the gifts but I don't even want to do that this year. It's not because Christmas is too "commercial"...thank God it is as our economy can use the boost every year...or because I don't like Christmas, because I do. It's because I just don't feel like it. I'm 51 years old and I've made up my mind.

Answer 7

Guess this means I won't be gettin my present this year huh? Don't worry, your not the only one feeling like that. Christmas is become way to commercial. I also think Hallmark invented Valintines day because there in the card business. Christmas is for the kids I always thought anyways. There so much o be thankful for anyways, I usually am able to keep my mind off sentimental stuff. There's just me so who really gives a hoot anyways. Merry Christmas just the same.

Answer 8

What a cool idea! Tell them that you would rather they gave the money to help someone in need. Tell them to make donations to their favourite charities, in your name and give you the reciepts. It will make them feel good, you won't have to store any crap that you don't want and somebody else will have a good Christmas, for a change.
As far as your spending goes, send the people you love a card and tell them that you can't afford anything else, but want them to know that you are wishing them the very best.
If they can't handle that, then they are way too materialistic to understand the meaning of Christmas.

Answer 9

Just explain in an early card to everyone you used to give gifts to that you're just not into gift exchange anymore and although you love them still the gifts have stopped. Don't elaborate on the stale cookie and stinky bubble bath part.
Try to find something in the holidays that pleases you.

Answer 10

Give the gift of communication and the sense of family. I know it's easier aid than done, but I have been there before.
One year I put photos of my Aunt & Uncle together that they had never seen before. My Mom snapped photos of just about everyone in the fam when I was small, and shoved them away in several boxes. I took them out, organized the mess, and put them in albums. Family members were mezmirized by the memories and not the rest of the junk around the tree.