How to be a good friend? I am too much for a lot of people to handle.?

Question

I try to be a very friendly person, but the problem is I suffer from severe depression. And whenever I feel comfortable with someone and I feel like we are getting close, inevitably the subject of my depression comes up. After I share with people about my depression and my suicidal thoughts, then people shy away from me. I feel like I am too much for people to handle. But its hard for me to feel close to someone if they really don't understand all of who I am. Any advice and suggestions? I am a real people person, I get really, really down when I am by myself. How can I be and have true friends, without scaring them away?

Answer 1

hello there ^_^ nice to meet you. Well I kind of agree with daljack, and I want to help you...just remember, don't tell these things to people you are starting to know and that you do not trust so much or believe in...the true friends will understand any situation you are undergoing no matter what you've done and who you are! True friends after knowing the real you will stay beside you and help you choose the right path...so don't feel bad if someone or a "friend" rejects you for who you are, just move on and look for that person who will understand you and like you the way you are. Always be yourself! Dont change for anyone...even if you do, you will be unhappy for being someone you are not and the people who like you for who you really are will stay away from you...just remember REAL friends are a gift from life and they are hard to find...but they are out there somewhere, I am sure you will find a true friend some day, no matter who you are, they will accept you and thats how you know if they are real friends =] next time just try to tell these things to people you REALLY trust like your parents and family...not people you start to know...remember, the bad friends will judge you because they might not know you well and if you tell them these personal things about you, they most likely won't understand. I suggest you just wait that the right friend will come one day. =] and keep personal reasons and problems for the family and counselors...also,some other advice...try to always look at the positive side of you and what you're good at...if you're always feeling sorry for yourself and not satisfied with who you are and your life...thats the same way the people who dont know you will feel towards you. Stay positive and always be yourself! Theres someone out there for EVERYONE! ^_^ hope this helps...if you ever need to talk to me, let me know.... :) send me a Private message and I'll give you my MSN if you wish. ^ ^

~Princess-Saphira aka Sophy~

Answer 2

Dont worry the problem of U R's is that no friends of U understand U Rself if they understand U Rself U R problem will be solved or the problem of U Rselves will be solved if U get a friend like me I have friends like U I can understand U R problem U R friends are only true to U dont worry If U like to call me have a call @ 9884641660 between 4.pm and 5pm in this week ending on 5th october2006 or sent an E-mail to me on [e-mail] @ any time. I will help U to come out of U R problem

Answer 3

Well first of all, maybe you should keep you suicidal thoughts to you and your family. To tell you the truth some friends dont wont to here about that stuff untill they really get to know you. There should be someone out there that you can share your feelings with. If they still dont understand then are they really your true friends?

Answer 4

Those people are just plain jerks, and no, i don't mean the junoir educated rich kid kind. Anyone should be happy to have a friend like you, you sound really nice. Instead of backing away, they should be supporting you. Talk to a counselor, and they could give some advice, I mean I am here rambling on about how mean that is when you want advice on how to get friends. Sorry, I just really care about you, even though I don't know you! Consider us friends and try to get even more!

Answer 5

Friendship
Each of us has a hidden place
Somewhere deep within ourselves;
A place where we go to get away,
To think things through,
To be alone, to be ourselves.

This unique place, where we confront our deepest feelings,
Becomes a storehouse of all our hopes,
All our needs, all our dreams,
And even our unspoken fears.
It encompasses the essence of who we are and what we want to be.

But now and then, whether by chance or design,
Someone discovers a way into that place we thought was ours alone.
And we allow that person to see, to feel and to share
All the reason, all the uncertainty
And all the emotion we've stored up there.

That person adds new perspective to our hidden realm,
Then quietly settles down in his own corner of our special place,
Where a bit of himself will stay forever.

And we call that person a friend.

That's all u need to know to be a friend :)

Answer 6

Most people will shy away from you when you mention depression and suicidal thoughts. you have to admit, hollywood does not do a good job of making that situation real. after all, with proper medication and treatment, people like you and me can be just fine. See a good psychiatrist who specializes in people who contemplate suicide. This will be the place for you to discuss openly your situation. take it one step at a time. in the meantime, be nice to people you meet and don't talk to them about scary stuff.

Answer 7

Have you thought about going to a specialist on this? You doctor should be 1st thing. Instead of telling all your problems to your friends; write it down on a journal.
Doing what you are doing, will worry people. good luck....."a day without a laughter is a waste"

Answer 8

What you're doing is showing people all the "not so good" stuff before they get to really know you.

Don't hide your problems....but gradually ease into it after the perceptive friends have known you for a while.

What you're doing is like saying hi and then pushing them into freezing cold water and then saying do you want to be my friend.

Answer 9

OK........first of all, get help from your doctor. I have been in your shoes. I went to a doc and she put me on antidepressants.......and they work. I still get a bit down at times but it doesnt last long. It is hard to dump stuff like that on a new friend. Please get some help ....it makes all the difference in the world

Answer 10

if you want a friend i'll be one. i too suffer from severe depression so i know what it's like, i've only got 3 friends, seriously.