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My husband works in a mostly male department. Over the past year or so he has increasingly received emails with dirty jokes,
pictures etc. from one of the ladies he works with. He is really on a list of several others and they just forward it all to everyone on the list (a few women, but mostly men). I do not mind them to a certain extent but some are really too graphic to forward to a co-worker, I feel. Yesterday I happened to see one of a woman with a thong on and it was pulled up so you could see the whole front of her private area. There was a supposedly cute joke with it but I feel that is not something appropriate to be forwarding to a co-worker.
My husband says I am over-reacting and there is no harm.
I trust him totally so its not that. I just feel like this kind of activity
progresses over time and should be addressed.
What should I do? Is it me?
Thanks for your reply.

2006-11-02 12:45:51 · 19 answers · asked by Patti Z 2 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

19 answers

You should let your husband deal with it since it is coming from his co-workers. I don't know where he works at but 97% of all businesses have spies. These ppl view any and everything that come through those email accounts.

If if is being sent to your home and you and your husband share an email account and you don't like receiving at home then you can always BLOCK the emails or delete them. But it is your husband's problem. I could understand it if, you were the one getting those emails.

Do I think you are over-reacting? No, you are just concerned about the graphic nature of the content. Do I think that this is similar to harrassment? No, BUT if it were YOUR co-workers sending you offensive emails and you'd asked them to stop and they didn't...then yes it would be harrassment. My advice, don't look at them. It's a good thing you trust your husband or else this could be real ugly. Good luck to you.

2006-11-02 12:55:48 · answer #1 · answered by NyteWing 5 · 0 0

It's a bit tasteless in my opinion. But still, if this is something the group regularly does, your husband may just be going along for the ride so as not to make waves. It doesn't mean u can't express your discomfort about it though. U are his wife and it's your right to let him know how u feel about it but let him handle the situation on his own.

2006-11-02 21:00:32 · answer #2 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0 0

If he is getting the emails from co-workers at work on the company computers, he better be careful. I've known of lots of people that have gotten fired for doing these things. If this is at work, it is totally inappropiate and if at the work place eventually they will get caught. Big Brother is watching everyone.

2006-11-02 20:57:23 · answer #3 · answered by Linda R 1 · 1 0

There may not be any "harm" as long as everyone is in agreement. However, why would he choose to put himself into a potentially compromising situation. It is very easy for that female to turn the tables and file a sexual harassment suit agains the company and all of the participants citing pressure to partcipate etc....
It's a safer bet for him to just not be part of the "jokes".

2006-11-02 21:36:50 · answer #4 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 0 0

Yes you are over reacting. Do you not have a sense of humor?! That's his e-mail why are you in his mail anyways? Would you rather him be miserable at work? Let him be if you trust him this shouldn't bother you. Now if a woman was sending him e-mails stating that she loves him or wants him that's when you say something but if he's letting you read them then obviously he has nothing to hide so let it be.

2006-11-02 21:40:06 · answer #5 · answered by littlemama 2 · 1 0

Considering the fact that he's one in many to receive the emails, I would just let it go, even though some of the email jokes are graphic and in poor taste.

2006-11-02 20:49:59 · answer #6 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 0 0

first of all he has to work with these people, and sometimes we turn the other cheek just to get along does not mean that he approves of it. him saying you making a big deal out of it is true. because its of no importance to him. prove of that is that he allows you free access to view them yourself. if u feel it is important and that company times is being wasted then contact the employer discreetly and tell him that this time of activity is actually a form of theft and he should notify the staff that it is considered as such

2006-11-02 20:55:06 · answer #7 · answered by redsyoungstud 3 · 0 0

The way I see it is this....if it bothers you, his wife, and he knows it bothers you, then he should ask that his name be taken off her forwarding list. He should respect you enough to do that. If not, speak to the woman and tell her yourself....bet she gets the point then!

2006-11-02 20:51:10 · answer #8 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0 0

You should discuss it with your husband and leave it up to him. You have no business doing anything at his work. You will only embarrass him and make him feel smaller. It is up to him to do something at work if it upsets you.

2006-11-02 20:50:37 · answer #9 · answered by egotist61 3 · 0 0

I agree with you 100%!!!! Ask hubby Dearest, if he would mind if you sent a picture like that to people you work with???? Even better, ask him to take a picture of you like that one and send it to everyone.

2006-11-02 20:52:54 · answer #10 · answered by whataboutme 5 · 0 0

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