Got married for all the wrong reasons. We really are better friends than anything. What should I do?
2006-11-02 11:16:35 · 20 answers · asked by Susie V 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Above all, be honest with him, especially if there are children involved. You may put up a good front for people or even each other, but I'm sure there is tension galore. Talk to him, tell him how you feel, and give him the chance to talk to you. Be sure to listen with an open mind and an open heart when you do have this conversation, but don't wait too long; things will only drag on forever and be worse in the long run if you do. Good luck!
2006-11-02 11:21:17 · answer #1 · answered by slowfreak 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in the same situation, only in reverse. If you're like me, the rest of your life is about as good as it's going to get. It's hard to throw it all away for the sake of your own happiness. At least that's what's stopping me. You hope for the best because you still care, but in your heart you know the flame is gone. People change. I know I did. Maybe you did too. A wise man once told me that everything happens for a reason. I think this is true. All these wise sages out there are quick to tell you what to do. In reality, it is you who has to live with your decision, not them. Therefore the decision is yours and yours alone. You must decide. Dear Abby put it best. She said "Would you be better off with him or without him?" Answer that question knowing what only you know, and act on it. I hope you have more courage than I have and can come to a decision. Good luck to you.
2006-11-02 11:32:13 · answer #2 · answered by Mike 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has to know how it is. You just have to sit down and talk. Heart to heart. If you are young (even if you aren't), there is life yet to live, and everyone deserves to be happy. Don't mess around, just be as honest as you can be and make plans to take the necessary steps toward ending the marriage as adult -like as you can. If he is feeling the same, there should be no problems. You may just be wondering what took you so long. good luck. No one should be unhappy or miserable. Hopefully, at least, you have learned what the 'right reasons' are for the next time you think about getting married.
2006-11-02 11:29:04 · answer #3 · answered by Nisey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi there. I feel that you hesitant to make the first move because since this is the first time you encounter such a situation, you don't know what to do- on top of that, you are dealing with a good friend- who happens to be your husband.
sometimes the best of friends can only go so far as being best friends. and if you appreciate him as your good friend, allow the atmosphere in the home (or even go out for coffee) and talk- what do you think of your marriage thus far, heart to heart, and then pour out what you feel.
if you are positive that you don't love him, tell him that. if you are afraid he might be hurt, don't. it will hurt him more trying to make you love him and son if you continue to stay and keep quiet about the whole thing.
2006-11-02 11:37:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anna D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should split up.
My wife was unhappy and didn't love me for two years, I was also unhappy but I never said so because I still loved her and couln't bear thinking of splitting up. Eventually at the second or third attempt she split up with me. She is happier as a result, and although I am still quite angry and upset about what has happened I know that in the long run it is best.
She knew she couldn't give me the love I wanted and needed and told me I deserved to have the chance to find it eslewhere.
It hurts, but in the long run it is worth the pain, I hope you have the bravery to do what you need to do-good luck.
2006-11-02 11:23:13 · answer #5 · answered by Very happily married. 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I honor the sanctity of marriage, but it sounds as though you don't have a marriage to work with. Decide what is important to you and move on from there. Sometimes in a relationship friends is all you can be and when you try to make more of it it often turns into a mess that has to be cleaned up.
2006-11-02 11:28:54 · answer #6 · answered by Special K 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit him down and talk with him, if your good friends that would be the first thing to do. Let him know how you feel and give him a chance to tell you how he feels. If neither of you are happy in the marriage, then get out. You need to be happy and you are the only one that can make that happen. Good luck and God Bless
2006-11-02 11:25:22 · answer #7 · answered by Sexy-n-Hot 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to him and tell him everything you're feeling, and have him do the same. this sounds so sad, and I'm sure that you're hurting, but maybe it the two of you can talk and understand each other better, you might find that you really do love each other and that your marriage is worth working on. I wish you only the best, and I will keep you in my prayers.
2006-11-02 11:31:06 · answer #8 · answered by atiana 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Something Specially
For You
I said a prayer for you today
And know God must have heard-
I felt the answer in my heart
Although He spoke no word!
I didn't ask for wealth or fame
(I knew you wouldn't mind)-
I asked Him to send you treasures
Of a far more lasting kind!
I asked that He'd be near you
At the start of each new day
To grant you health and blessings
And my friendship to share your way
I asked for happiness for you
In all things great and small-
But it was for His loving care
I prayed the most of all.
By: Kenny P. aka-Cobra
2006-11-02 11:24:49 · answer #9 · answered by Cobra 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Life is to short to be unhappy, if you do not want to work on the marriage then leave..sounds like you have your mind made up..Tell him how you feel.
2006-11-02 11:25:01 · answer #10 · answered by Shem 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋