Im 18, she 16. She told her dad she is pregnant and she is just a month. Now her dad doesnt want her to have the baby cuz she is too young. I am totally against it. But he gives me the option of either payin about 500 dollars for the abortion or goin to jail for her bein a minor. Now he wants the money in two freakin days, which is ridiculous cuz i dont got a tree in my backyard that grows money. I really want her to have the baby. She kindawants to too but cuz of her dad she wont. I got to have it by saturday. What should i do? I was thinkin of jus goin to jail on purpose but idk if that would help prevent abortion. Express your opinions please. Thank You
2006-11-02 09:59:14 · 27 answers · asked by Mr.*LUii$* jR. 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I read in your other question that you are from florida, the age of consent there is 16 years old so he cannot send you to jail . Also her father cannot make her have an abortion and if you love her you can get married without her parents consent as she is at least 16 and she is pregnant.
2006-11-02 10:10:40 · answer #1 · answered by greeneyedprincess 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think the reply you got from greeneyeddevil is probably right on target, and I hope she is correct. Look up the information for yourself, just to be sure.
The only thing I would add is this: as a parent, I know that I might be inclined to throw a fit, too, if something like this happened. Horrible way to react, but very human.
Babies take awhile to arrive, and that gives everybody time to adjust to everything. If she doesn't want the abortion, she shouldn't have it. You probably need to let her make the decision on that.
Just keep a low profile, and tell them you will do what you can financially, but you don't have $500. Eventually, this may all work out fine. Time is a great healer.
What about YOUR parents? Are they willing to let her come and stay there, in exchange for having a new grandchild? I would ask them, if I were you.
Sex is a very natural thing, and of course you should have used protection, but you are not a bad person.
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2006-11-02 18:19:54 · answer #2 · answered by mia2kl2002 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it won't prevent the abortion, her dad will try to make her have one anyway. the great thing is, at that age i do not believe he can "force" her too. you need to find that out, though. and realize this, going to jail doesn't bode well for you and her anyway, how would you take care of things while you are there? kudos on trying to do the right thing about your baby. but what gave you the idea it was okay to have sex with a sixteen year old? i know it is the average age and all, but that is really too young to accept the responsibility of a baby. and, guess what young man, that is what sex is for. that is the natural biological achievement of sex. toss out all the "intimacy" and relationship hooplah, sex is for procreation. babies are sex's purpose, are you getting the idea? at your age you may just be mature enough to take care of the baby, but what about her? she's 16, unless she is pretty smart, she probably hasn't even graduated yet. I don't know your gf, but i highly doubt she can handle both school and a baby...and the job she will have to get to help support the child. you can't pay for everything, or else you won't be able to live on your own very well at all. and it isn't her dad or mom's job. let's break this down, she will have to pay for daycare for the baby while she is in school and at work, that's around $150 a week. not to mention, formula for amonth will run you about 150-200, diapers a month will be close to a hundred, various baby clothes will run you $30 a month, wipes, $15, shampoo, 10, medicines will be 20-30 a month.
think about this the next time you want top shake that thing out of your pants. babies are great, i've got two and am pregnant again. but i know what i am doing. i know the consequences. i know how to do this. a sixteen year old doesn't and you need to realize that before you two get any deeper than this, not that there is much deeper you can go.
good luck dude, i hope everything will work out for the best for you, but especially for her and the baby
2006-11-02 18:14:43 · answer #3 · answered by Donna L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are against her having an abortion than that is your right not to pay for it. I don;t know if you would go to jail if the parents knew you were having sex and you are within 2 years of each other. That would be the last of my worries. If you go to jail you go to jail. The more pressing issue is the pregnancy. Abortions can not be undone. You are young and so is she. You both have a lot to think about and you need to take the time to do just that.
Is the issue money or the abortion itself? Do your parents know? Hopefully this will give you a good reality check and next time you will use a condom.
Good luck!
2006-11-02 18:07:03 · answer #4 · answered by Perri L 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't choose jail if you can help it because her dad will get her to abort anyway. I know you want to have it and stay with her but you have to think about what your life will be life 20 years down the road. You should have thought about that one night about a month ago but I know u don't want to hear that... Let's put morality aside and look at reality. Her dad has got you by the b@lls. I don't really see any option for you except to give in to her dad, he'll probably not want you to see her, but if you 2 really want to spend the rest of your life together and have babies together, the 2 of you should be able to wait the less-than-2-years until she is 18 and then you can look at the real situation and decide if the 2 of you are ready to settle down and start a family that you can responsibly support and if that's what u 2 want to do with the rest of your lives. Sorry to hear your situation. Good luck.
2006-11-02 18:05:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Depending on what state you live in there may be nothing her dad can do to you. I got pregnant at 17 and my bf (now hubby) was 19. In Utah 16 is the age of consent and as long as you are no more than 2 years older than the minor it is OK. I would go to jail before I would pay for my child to be killed. Plus if you do have to do time usually for this kind of thing they just give you probation. Not to bad for saving a life. It is so nice to see a dad that wants to be a dad. Congrats for being a man! Good luck. I hope you can save your baby!
2006-11-02 18:03:36 · answer #6 · answered by Mrs. Always Right 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
being in Law School, I would not go to jail. This will screw up your life more than you already have. You need to be a man, since you are an adult, and talk with her father. You all can work this out as a team. Don't be scared. You should be ashamed and now you have to make a major decision. Can't you get someone your own age? You better be glad that you didn't do that to my daughter. If I were her dad you would be in deep..... Good luck and get someone your own age. She will have to make the decision on her own. Abortion is not the answer. You better get a job, babies are expensive......
2006-11-02 18:09:53 · answer #7 · answered by Promoqueen in CA 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she doesn't want to get an abortion, then her father cannot make her. Depending on where you live, you may not be arrested for her being a minor. If you have been together for a while and you just turned 18 you should be safe. I do believe that she is too young to be a mother and you a father. If you are against abortion, then consider adoption. Good Luck!!!
2006-11-02 18:17:36 · answer #8 · answered by KC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have to go to jail to keep her from having a abortion, then it's well worth it. Her parents can't make her do anything she doesn't want too. Especially telling her she has to have a abortion. Just let her know that. I would wait until you were suppose to pay her dad the money and see what happens. The worst thing is going to jail. Not so fun but atleast you are not giving her money to kill your baby. GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!
2006-11-02 18:07:22 · answer #9 · answered by lilmoma4202006 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
all these people here talking about morality, committment and should'ves missed the point, drastically.
You knocked her up, but since she's 16 and you're 18, you won't see the inside of a cell. I can promise you that.
Obviously it's a messy situation but since her dad lost the "pay or go to jail" card you really have 2 months to get the money.
That is IF you decide to pay.
Her dad obviously won't let her have the kid, whether you pay or not.
BTW. Her dad is basically extorting you, which is illegal
Never hit the tang without a jimmy hat
2006-11-02 18:14:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋