Before you answer, I'm a girl I just have a guy advatar.
I told my friends that I want until I'm 25 to have sex. I'm 15 now and I want to be completely ready. I will have sex if I am married before then, but people say that I'm taking it too far. I will have boy friends but I just won't sleep with them unless I'm completely, completely sure that they're not just there for sex and we have to be togrther for a looooooooooooooooong time. But I have two questions.
Am I taking sex too seriously with the age thing and all?
And is it true that if I accomplish my goal and be a virgin until the age of 25, no man would want me because they would want a more experienced woman?(A boy told me that, but he was trying to convince me to loose my virginity at the same time. And no he wasn't my boyfriend. But I just want to know if that's true.)
2006-11-02 08:31:48 · 55 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
NO!! For taking the step of making the decision to wait at least until you are married (or 25) you are being VERY WISE!!!! I give you a LOT of credit, and especially if you can keep that pact with yourself. I wish I had waited- and most girls do after they get a little older and actually find someone they truly love. Do not listen to anyone that tells you that you are taking it too seriously, because it is a serious thing. There are too many people that DONT take it serious enough, and wind up either pregnant or with some uncurable STD (or worse, both!). Stick with your guns, and please please please, be true to yourself! You are very smart @ 15 for making this decision!
2006-11-02 08:36:32 · answer #1 · answered by Earthy Angel 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Hmmm...
No you're taking the sex situation fine. If you want to wait until 25 great. However me giving advice to an underage is kinda hard. Also be aware that your opinions on things will change greatly as you age. 25 is a little excessive if you want to be "safe" wait until 21. Unless you feel very strongly about it. No female any age will have a hard time finding a mate, unless they're fat. Ugly can be ignored.
If you do lose your virginity before 25 I suggest you do it in the 18-22 range. Find some you're comfortable with not, because they're hot.
Your first time doing it you'll feel really, really, awkward and stupid. (Cause you're dumbfounded). Your best case scenario is find another virgin. So you both can feel stupid and awkward together and it'll be less embarrassing or forceful. Then you guys can practice and get comfortable with each other. If the relationship doesn't last (which it probably won't if you rush it). Then at least you won't be so uncomfortable with a new person.
As for your second question. That boy is dumb. That is not true. Some men look for "untainted" people becaue there's less baggage. Also guy don't care if you're a virigin or not. They still want a warm vagina to plug it in.
Finally. Stay off the internet. It's not safe. Serious.
2006-11-02 08:44:20 · answer #2 · answered by chickenpoo 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think it's good that you want to hold onto your virginity until you know that you're ready. I congratulate you on recognizing that you're not ready now (and on being able to thwart the arguments of knot-headed boys who try to get into your pants). But it's hard now to decide when you will be ready. You might be ready at 25; you might be unmarried at 20, but with the right man and ready then. It's hard to make that determination ow.
It is not true that no man will want you if you are still a virgin into your adult years. You would have to believe that there is no woman a man would want after a while--they don't want virgins, they don't want girls who have already had babies with someone else out of wedlock; they don't want the girls who are easy and have already been through all of their friends. The right man for you will be very understanding and even grateful that you stood by your convictions and waited until the time was right.
2006-11-02 08:38:30 · answer #3 · answered by julz 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd stay a virgin.as long as you can... Its your reputation... its never easy to go the high road,. once you have sex ... things are never the same with guys.( things change beyond your comprehension) its a lot easier now to not have an attachment that sex brings. And its not true about being experienced... guys like the opposite.They dont want the TOWN SLUT..... They talk a good talk.But inthe end ... they want to settle down with the girl who hasnt been passed around like a morning newspaper. .. but I think your intentions are good... 50 years ago you were a virgin on your marriage day. Now its a miracle... Try and stay true to your ideals ... you will be happy in the years to come. Go to school .. get a good job and then have a "married Life"
2006-11-02 11:00:04 · answer #4 · answered by zachs mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, It's not going too far to expect this from yourself. By waiting until you are 25 you could save yourself countless embarrasment, hurt, dissatisfaction,and not to mention STD's. These are only some of the problems that come out of having under age relations. But mostly I think you need to know when a boy or a young man is financially, intellectually, and emotionally prepared to have CHILDREN, he will be more likely to be willing to have a meaningful relationship that is based on love and not sex. If you prepare yourself to wait until you are 25, you will also be waiting for the one you love to mature enough to be able to take on the responsibilities of adulthood and therefore be able to appreciate you for more than just a one night stand. And, no, it's NOT TRUE that no one would want you.
2006-11-02 08:54:36 · answer #5 · answered by David K 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No if that is what you want to do that is fine. The guy was just saying that so you would give it to him. Most guys find that virgins are better and your less likely to have a sexually transmitted disease. All guys are different. Some guys like fat girls, some like tall girls, some like nasty girls, and so on... So you really can't say what a guy likes. All people are different. Diseases is another thing you have to worry about. If you don't know the person and where they have been, they might have something you can't wash off (you know what I mean). Don't let people pressure you into anything. You have a brain, use it for yourself. I agree with being with someone for a long time. I was seventeen when I lost mine and I regret it. Not that I lost it, but who I lost it to. I just gave something special to a person that did not deserve it. He broke up with me the next day. So becareful and use your own judgement. If you make a mistake, it will be your mistake and not someone else's. Good luck.
2006-11-02 08:42:02 · answer #6 · answered by Xena 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes and no.
I think it is great that you want to wait to have sex until you are completely ready and mature enough. But you can't really put an age on that. Sex is a serious matter, so I'm glad you're taking it seriously. It should be enough for you to say that you will wait until you are ready...don't put an age expectation on it.
And no, guys are not going to avoid you because you are a virgin. Any guy who tells you that now just wants to get in your pants. When you find yourself in the trusting relationship when you are ready, your partner will respect your decision and treat you accordingly.
2006-11-02 08:38:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No you aren't taking it to far...Having sex is a big thing. It should be special to everyone involved! Don't just do it to please they guy. Also if you get to the age of 25 or the age where you are ready to get married the fact that you are still a virgin should not matter to the person marrying you. Yes sex is apart of marriage but its not the number 1 thing. He should have similar beliefs as you do and/or respect the fact that you are saving yourself bc in the end you have saved yourself for him...he should feel lucky
2006-11-02 08:42:02 · answer #8 · answered by ** Just me ** 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
More power to ya sister! I am proud of you and I hope your parents are too! Your friends are just insecure because they probably already gave it up. I am telling you as a 24 year old woman who waited until her wedding night to lose her virginity. You can wait, don't let anyone tell you that it is not worth the wait. And the man you marry will be so happy that you saved yourself just for him. My husband was also a virgin on our wedding night, and we both enjoyed each other, only each other!
Your friends should be encouraging you not trying to sway your decision. Don't worry about what other people think, keep running the race and don't give up!
2006-11-02 08:40:21 · answer #9 · answered by Lilat180 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know that setting a specific age for yourself to stay a virgin is good, but it's definitely commendable. I would say, wait until the time is right and stick to your guns, don't give into sex for just some horny boy.
As for no man wanting you because you are a virgin, don't worry about it. The guys worth marrying won't have any problem with it. Plus, if your guy is also a virgin, how would he know any different?
2006-11-02 08:36:14 · answer #10 · answered by Stacy 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋