my friend is so tired , she has been breast feeding her three month old baby boy every two hours since birth. she doesn't want to give up nursing her baby but would love a break and her husband would love to feed and bond more with his son. he just refuses to take a bottle. looking for any tips.
2006-11-02 07:59:11 · 28 answers · asked by Mairead B 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
I know it is hard to hear but you may have to let the baby cry for awhile. They learn fast that if they fuss, you will do what they want.When the baby gets really hungry he will accept the bottle. Put some rice cereal in the bottle. He will stay full longer, therefore not want to be fed as often.I was a neonatal nurse for 6 years.
2006-11-02 08:07:30 · answer #1 · answered by sherryrnccu 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Does the bottle contain formula? If so, has she tried expressing so its breast milk. Or is it just the teat baby is objecting to. Its a little hard to answer without knowing.
Some breast fed babies do just feed this often. Its not usual but its not rare either. Your friend needs lots of support to carry on. Get the Health Visitor involved if she isn't already so they can give practical advice.
It does sound if baby isn't perhaps getting enough of the fatty hindmilk. Maybe your friend is switching the baby to the other breast before the first is fully drained so baby isn't getting the full whack of the calorific hind bit. This comes out more slowly so maybe the baby is fussing when this happens and your friend is taking baby off thinking its fussing coz its finished. It will have quite a bit of foremilk in its tummy so won't object. But then will get hungry again quicker. Advise your friend to let the baby feed for at least 20 minutes on the one side before switching or keep switching backwards and forwards so both breast fully drained. Or to offer the second breast after the first, if not already doing so, even if the baby 'seems' satisified.
Also, she may be feeding when its actually tiredness or something else, without realising it. Its very easy to misread a baby, even a 3 month old one. I've done it twice myself!
Good luck to her from me. She's doing a wonderful thing and should be helped to carry on if she really wants to.
2006-11-05 09:36:20 · answer #2 · answered by LJayne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have had the same problem with all of my four children. Supplementing with a bottle does not require her to give up nursing. It may be difficult to get the baby to accept the bottle. You could try to give the bottle to the baby while he is sleeping, he will naturally suck. It might be possible then to introduce it while he is awake a couple of days later.
The baby may also not like what is in the bottle, some breastfed babies won't drink breast milk out of a bottle and others won't drink formula. The mom might want to try both.
Different types of nipples may make a difference. Onestepahead.com used to sell a bottle that was shaped like a breast (never tried but looked nice), they may still sell it.
The mom should try to not be present during the feeding do the baby can not hear or smell her. Some babies are more likely to take a bottle if they are starving and others are more likely to take the bottle in between feedings.
As you can see there are lots of variables and no one right answer. It can be very frustrating for the mom, the dad, and the baby at first.
If the only problem is that she is tired, she sould try to nurse lying down. I have not had any sleeplees nights due to my baby's being hungry, as I lie down on my side and sleep while my baby nurses.
2006-11-02 08:10:12 · answer #3 · answered by Heather G 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Because sucking milk from a bottle requires different mouth and tongue movements than breastfeeding, it may take your baby a little time to get used to the change. Try these tips for a smooth transition:
• Offer her a bottle a little earlier than her regular feeding time so she'll be hungry and interested, but not so hungry that she'll be frustrated by the cold nipple.
• Let someone else feed her the first bottle.Your baby will be less confused if you don't give her the bottle yourself, since she may wonder why she's not getting your breast. Instead, ask someone who might feed her in your absence — your mother, your partner, a childcare provider, or another mother — to make the first introduction.
• Try to be out of the house for this event; babies can smell their mother from a distance of at least 20 feet, and she may know that you (and your breasts) are around even if you're in another room.
2006-11-02 08:13:14 · answer #4 · answered by TRINA 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
find a nursing coach like from the la leche league or a local hospital. Having that support is always helpful. Feeling isolated just makes the other emotions and tired feelings compound.
Then I would suggest pumping and trying to bottle feed with breast milk. Get a good electric pump, don't waste your time on hand pumps or battery pumps. I learned from experience. I would have my hubby feed the baby breast milk with a bottle a couple of times a day to help out. The baby will put up with a bottle nipple if it tastes your milk. You may have to try several different nipples until you find one the baby will take. Luckily there are many different shapes and kinds on the market to choose from.
Tell her to try not to give up, sleep when her baby sleeps. This is all part of motherhood. It will not last forever.
She is doing the best thing for her baby right now. Hang in there it will get better.
FYI, Faith gave a great answer and if you live in America a "dummy" is called a pacifier or binky.
2006-11-02 08:14:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I can understand your friend being tired. Babies do make you feel terribly tired. But please reassure her she is doing a FANTASTIC job and its worth perservering that little bit longer, it really is the best for baby.
Instead of trying to convert the baby to bottle, why not try just trying to make the times between feeds a little longer. I know its awful when baby is crying but try and make it every two hours 15 mins, then every two and a half hours etc. Get advice from the doctor or health visitor.
Your friend's husband will be helping his wife enormously by doing other chores, thus giving her time to rest.
Also, unless your friend objects, try giving the baby a dummy - rub a little breast milk onto it. I had to do that when my baby always wanted to be on the breast!
Another source of help, and it was a great help and comfort to me, would be the National Childbirth Trust. They have mums who are trained as breast feeding counsellors. You could help your friend by looking up someone in your area and arranging a visit.
I do hope your friend can continue to feed until 6 months at least. The benefits to the baby are very great.
Give her all the support you can. You sound a super friend!
2006-11-02 08:13:48 · answer #6 · answered by Caroline 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Firstly I am going to assume she is pumping for him, if she isn't she should consider it. It is cheaper than formula and better for both.
Secondly, if they go to a Lactation consultant they will show the husband how to cup feed. Or even use a supplimental nursing system (which are expensive, but for once or twice a day it might be ok) She should talk to an LC anyway to see if they have any advice about maybe stretching out feedings. Or La Leche League which is free www.llli.org
If she really wanted at three months the baby isn't too young for gentle and appropriate sleep training. Generally I say nursing on demand is best but if it isn't working for goodness sake a 3 month old baby can go say 6 hours at night. If momma ain't happy ain't nobody happy as they say. You can hire sleep coaches, I don't know what finances are like obviously but I have heard some of them are truely amazing.
Also encourage your friend to get out of the house (with baby) as much as possible. Busy babies nurse less, and she may really feel better if she gets some time with adults, particularly other moms. Check Yahoo! groups for some local mommy groups. Helps me.
2006-11-02 08:34:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend should do everything possible to continue breastfeeding. Her husband should be helping by making sure she is well hydrated, eating healthy, and getting rest. She should also sleep when her baby is sleeping. There are many ways the husband can bond with the son besides bottle feeding, being with the child while mother is resting would benefit the whole family. The first few months of parenting can be exhausting and rough, but breastfeeding is one of the best things a mother can do for the baby and 3 months old is way too early to wean.
2006-11-02 08:09:34 · answer #8 · answered by house_of_boys 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm having the same problem with my 4 month old! They do settle down, mine has settled into 5 feeds over 24 hours in the last few weeks.
I have tried all the usual methods, but the most success seems to be (albeit a gradual thing) with our current attempt, using Boots Nursing Teats, which a bit like a nipple shield for baby to feed through. Then using a Boots bottle teat with the same nipple... (look carefully when you are buying, for the ones with the same length and texture 'nipple' as the nursing teats) She no longer objects wholeheartedly, and has even managed a few mouthfuls before deciding that its just not the same. But this is progress, and hopefully with perseverence...
http://www.boots.com/shop/product_details.jsp?productid=1077475&classificationid=1034965
2006-11-02 09:08:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have her express milk for the bottle, use a Nuk type nipple preferably silicone so it's tasteless. When dad goes to feed the baby have him tickle the baby's cheek softly and speak in soothing soft cooing tones holding the baby near his heart. It will take a few tries but you can successfully both breast and bottle feed. The problem with doing both usually arises when the bottle has formula it has a very different taste-not as sweet as mothers milk. If she wants to completely switch she has to take a few days getting the baby used to the bottle-start with one feeding then 2 and so on. It is very important she drink lots of water and juice as well as continue her prenatal vitamins as long as she breast feeds, that may help with her energy as well. Good Luck!
2006-11-02 08:13:15 · answer #10 · answered by Walking on Sunshine 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Breastfeeding is one of the best things we can do for our children but it can becoming quite restrictive for mothers.
I think that if you are breastfeeding every two hours at 3 months then either you are feeding the baby when in fact he may not even be really hungry or that maybe you don't have enough milk.
I know this sounds like a harsh thought but it may be true.
Breastfed babies don't ever really want to go to the bottle but you just need to keep trying.
Maybe try to change the sort of bottles or the teets that are being used.
Sorry that I can't offer any further info as I was lucky enough and had the time to be able to breastfeed until the age of two years.
Good luck but keep trying.
It must be emotionally and physically draining but with the support of friends like you I'm sure it will work out
2006-11-02 08:09:14 · answer #11 · answered by EVA 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋