Girls-is this normal behaviour???It's confused me....serious answers only please?

Question

When I mention the topic of commitment\feelings and relationships with my close female friend she changes the topic and won't speak about it,even though I'm not referring to 'us'.I only ask for her views,she goes quiet.WHY won’t she talk about this with me???

Recently she thought that I started dating a girl and she practically ignored me for a week and contact is still on-off,not like it used to be.Was this jealousy or just a coincidence?My behaviour HAS NOT changed towards her and I'm not actually dating anyone.I was told she is happy for me, if so,why wouldn’t she ask about this girl,seeing she’s a good mate?

Also when I joked she had a new boyfriend she shouted down the phone "what f**king boyfriend! There’s no one, I wish I had one,f**king hell".Why'd she get so angry?

Am to meet her this wkn,she said no serious conversations(referring to relationships\commitment\feeli... I believe),I asked her why and she’s gone quiet on me since.WHY?

Have I done anything wrong?

OTHER INFO:Might be useful....

I keep going out with my close female friend,(in touch practically everyday) we go to dinner, lunch together and for drinks in the evening. We also take roadtrips together to the coast and to the country for walks, usually followed by dinner and its just the 2 of us. While we're out we flirt, tell each other everything, feel very comfortable with each other, sort of act as a couple....

I've noticed that she does not like it when I mention other girls that have caught my eye, she changes the subject ASAP. When I mention if she's interested in anyone, the answer is always no,she hasn't pulled anyone when out,etc...we kissed once after 1 night out(a few months bck,very passionate) but nothing since (wud remain only friends),we just keep meeting up,in constant touch etc

She don't want to talk about it, what can I do if she won't speak to me?It's like she's pushing me away.At this rate the friendship will be getting damaged. How can I ask her to go on a date?we already go out alone!She knows how I feel about her,I'd be surprised if she didn't.How would I tell her?
Any other explanations?

Answer 1

Dude open your eyes!!! She wants you!!! Ask her out.

Answer 2

I know you directed the question at girls but I was in a very similar position to you. It's always hard to talk about feelings with close friends as you have found out. The way see it is that it has reached the stage where you have to make the decision as to what you want - friendship or a relationship? Once you have made that decision then you have to make the first move. In terms of making first moves most women want men to do it. As you said, you already spend time together alone so it's not a matter of asking her on a date but telling her straight up what you want from this. However, as she has asked specifically for no 'serious conversations' this weekend then maybe choose another time to do so. Very best of luck.

Answer 3

I don't think you're a dumbarse, but I think she has done a good job of making you feel that way. It sounds like she is playing the standard head games that scared women play. She is afraid of commitment(or she doesn't see you as a suitable suitor). If it wasn't a head game she would be open and honest and wouldn't want to hide where you stand. She maybe an interesting girl but maybe you should investigate why you would want to hook up with a playa. This kind of women have always led to trouble in my experience. She's a heartbreak in the making. BTW, that friend of yours sounds like a better roll of the dice, amigo.

Answer 4

She is in the kind of unrequited love people fall into sometimes with very close friends. It can never really be a total friendship or a relationship really and it will go on like that until there's some emotional disussion or she gets a real boyfriend (which will not happen as long as she is with you in your pretend relationship all the time). If you like her back, you might as well try to kiss her again and see what happens. If you don't, you'll just have to wait her out.

Answer 5

She's in love with you also but is too afraid to say it out. She doesn't want to say something for fear that you don't feel the way she does. Especially since you guys kissed a while back but never talked about it or did it again. She's just scared because she wants to be with you so much but can't find the courage to say it. You are going to have to tell her by yourself otherwise, you are both going to get tired of waiting for eachother and your feelings would pass for now but neither of you will ever stop feeling that way. So seize the opportunity or live to regret it forever. You won't lose anything because your friendship (the way you've described it) would alway be there to fall back on. Goodluck

Answer 6

It's obvious that she likes you. As for how to ask her out, just do it. Tell her you'd like to try being more than friends. If she ignores that, then just be her friend and don't go on trips and talk about feelings and other girls. Just meet up once in a while.

BTW-I had a crush on a guy in high school. We talked on the phone every day and about every thing. Even after he left my school and went to another and we never saw each other in person, we still talked everyday. I talked to him about guy trouble and he listened. Well, about 7 years later, we started going out. Turns out he liked me too all that time, he was just having issues. We dated about a year and a half. Now we're married (almost 10 years) and have 3 kids.

Good luck!

Answer 7

I think she likes you but won't admit it!! Some of us girls are really shy and scared of being hurt. We act brave and do the right things but still can't admit feelings for a friend. She might think she is not good enough for you, or that you won;t like her in that way.
Do you like her?? If you do then give her time. Carry on as you are without the relationship talk, and give it longer. She might just be testing you to see if she can push you away completely because she might believe that men don't stick around.
If you think she is well worth having then give her time to see that you aren't going anywhere and want to be with her. Be prepared, she sounds like a tough, shy cookie. Coming outright and asking her out might scare her half to death so be gentle.
Good luck - Invite me to the wedding in 2 years!!

Answer 8

Yikes.....I can imagine this is probably very difficult. Do you want to be in a serious relationship with her? If so, kiss her again, and this time, when you pull away, tell her this time it was serious, and that you would like to continue being serious. If you dont want to be in a relationship with her and would prefer to be "just friends" with her, then you need to make that very clear to her. It kinda seems like she is so attached to you that she doesnt want anyone to have you nor does she. You may end up losing a bit of your friendship but at least your mind will be a little clearer. Good luck

Answer 9

Hey mate are you in love with her? Friends but passionate kiss?
Is she beautiful?
I think you fancy her and she fancies you. Why don't you get drunk, really drunk together and kiss again?
Maybe this will resolve the situation?
Sorry, she isn't friend, this doesn't sound as just a "friend" thing.
And this is not normal behaviour for a friend.
Is there something happening? Chemistry? something doesn't sound right from what you are saying.
Or maybe she has got some kind of problem(mental problem?) and you don't know? She is lesbian?
Etc

Answer 10

It sounds to me like she may like you. She probably realizes that you are a good guy and since you both know everything about eachother, she feels even more inclined to want to be with you. And since you talk about you possibly being with other girls, it scares her that she might not only lose you as a good friend, but as a possible boyfriend as well.

Answer 11

Sounds like your firend's a bit jealous. Why not be open and talk to her about how you feel and how you see your future friendship or relationship. No point in both of you avoiding the subject! Good luck!