I am bi (leaning toward women). Everytime I try to "hit on" a girl, she says I'm too feminine. I really don't get it. Isn't being pretty good? I'm so frustrated I don't know what to do! Guys won't leave me alone, but girls won't give me the time of day!
2006-11-02 06:30:33 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Maybe another question would be... Why would a strait person be "pretending to be bi"... If a girl is hitting on another girl, isn't it clear that they are not strait?
2006-11-02 07:47:10 · update #1
it's all a personal preference, just like some people like blonds, or red heads, we are all diff rent.
I personally am attracted to "femme" ladies, but that is just me.
I know people who only like "butch/stud" ladies, and then some who like a mix of both.
Try getting involved in local groups for LGBT people, or perhaps a bisexual support group in your area.
don't let it get you down, try try and try again :)
2006-11-02 06:40:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
The main question: you're hittin' on the wrong girls? There's plenty of ladies who like more traditionally feminine ladies. As for your second question, I didn't look at the other answers and I don't know the context, but part of the stigma against bisexuals comes from straight girls who DO hit on / make out with other girls strictly to tittilate men. Also, for some reason, the gay community carries all kinds of stigma and disrespect for bisexuals (which is awful); if these women know you're bi and not a "strict lesbian", they might just be making excuses.
2006-11-02 23:42:03 · answer #2 · answered by Atropis 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you hittin on feminine women??? Most fems where I am from are not at all attacted to another feminine woman. They tell me all the time when I ask (because it is a personal fantasy of mine), why wont they say to much or be with another fem. The majority of them replied that they would have sex with another fem but they wouldnt actually have a relationship with one. From a studz point of view, I love a woman that is as you call it,"too fem"..,.there is nothing betta. But what are you interested in? My advice to you sweetheart is keep givin it to 'em..im sure a good shawty will come around.
2006-11-03 04:41:10 · answer #3 · answered by cutesoftdom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suppose it's possible that you are coincidentally hitting on lesbians who prefer butch women...or perhaps you are somehow coming off as straight (and pretending to be bi) and they don't want to mess with a straight girl. Maybe you could first become friends with some other bi girls and develop relationships that way.
2006-11-02 15:20:13 · answer #4 · answered by Andrea 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think part of your problems is equating 'pretty' to 'feminine'. For a lot of people, 'butch' is amazingly hot and gorgeous. I know it is for me! But believe me, a lot of women- bi or lesbians, love femmes. You just have to find them.
Also, it may be the connotations. For a lot, femme = bisexual or straight, and if they don't want to be with those women, for whatever reason, they may avoid you.
Either way, good luck on finding a girl who appreciates you. They're out there!
2006-11-02 14:38:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Some people like it hot some like it cold.
Im a very feminine lesbian, I work in an office I dress in heels and women dress clothes I get my hair done I like my nails done, I don't look or dress like a man.
So don't feel bad I dont understand why a girl has to dress like a man to be a lesbian. I am very girlie and I like girlie women. I have dated a woman who dressed in guy clothes, but she also dressed in women clothes too. She was very feminine about herself she was just a tom-boy. We got along great I relocated for my job and we just decided to be friends.
So if you feel noone understands, its okay I do!!!
2006-11-03 09:11:54 · answer #6 · answered by Some1Special 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are the butch women saying this too? Keep trying my experience is you just make a $ hit load of friends. You will be bound to find someone who will catch your eye.
2006-11-02 15:33:19 · answer #7 · answered by mylife 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I love feminine women. I don't really understand why lesbians go for girls that look like men. IM NOT SAYING ITS WRONG. I just dont understand it. I like my girls to be feminine, curvy, soft, smell good, long soft hair, etc...
2006-11-02 14:33:34 · answer #8 · answered by IMHO 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
My best friend is a girly lesbian. There are plenty of women who like her. Being sincere is more important that being feminine.
2006-11-02 14:35:55 · answer #9 · answered by sixgun 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that being "fem" is your problem, I think you may simply be attracted to the "wrong kind" of lesbian woman(one that's interested in the same thing you are).
2006-11-02 15:05:52 · answer #10 · answered by IndyT- For Da Ben Dan 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋