My friend Pat who is 18yrs like me and wants to elope with his gf of 8 months they have a long distance relationship only saw each other for 3 months of dating she went to college out of state. They want to elope over the fall break and i was invited as a witness. I have been polite about it but my friend Pat keeps asking me what i think we have been friends for 4 almost 5 years and i dont want to be rude but i think its a bad idea.Am i wrong should i just smile through it?
2006-11-02 05:12:36 · 6 answers · asked by shelly m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I dont want to see him get hurt i think he is still in puppy love stage not real love.
2006-11-02 05:13:58 · update #1
take a page from the girl book and take him aside, over a beer or beverage of choice, and TELL him exactly what you think and feel about this marriage.
Behonest with yourself as well as him
seems to me that he is in love with more of the idea/fantasy life with this girl as he doesn't really have enough knowledge of everyday life with her as husband/wife
you can use that ifu like when u talk to him
2006-11-02 05:16:31 · answer #1 · answered by jelli_bean_36 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think, if he really wants you to be there, you should be there. You can voice your opinion tactfully; chances are - he won't listen. But it's ok, sometimes people need to make mistakes for themselves to learn more about how things work. He's got plenty of time to make a mistake, to learn from it, and to try better next time. It's quite alright! Life is not ALWAYS about making all the "right" choices. And sometimes, our "wrong" choices turn out to be the best of them all.
2006-11-02 13:22:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You tell him your thoughts exactly. Preface it with...I tell you this honestly not only because you asked...but you're a close friend and I value your opinion as much as you value mine.
If he says "No..I disagree with you" You tell him you aren't looking for an argument. Your opinion was solicited and there it is. Advice is free so take it or leave it...you won't be insulted.
However....it wouldn't hurt to say "But...if things go badly you can never say you weren't forewarned".
2006-11-02 13:17:35 · answer #3 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would tell your friend you cant be a witness because you would be a hypocrit. and tell him you think he is making a mistake and that you didnt tell himsooner because you were afraid to hurt him but that you now realize you wouldnt be agood friend if you didnt at least tell him how you felt about it. he may continuesly be asking you because he has doubts also and needs someone to agree before he can admit to it. tell him you are better for it.
2006-11-02 13:19:13 · answer #4 · answered by becca_2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
even though you may know it's wrong he can't see it right now so just talk to him as afriend that is concerned let him know why your concerned but at the same time let him know what ever he decides to do you will be there for him because thats what friends are for.
2006-11-02 13:16:08 · answer #5 · answered by juicy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
........DON'T BE A WITNESS TO SOMETHING YOU THINK IS WRONG.
ASK HIM IF HE IS SURE HE WANTS TO SPEND THE NEXT
50 YEARS WITH THIS GIRL
2006-11-02 13:19:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋