i was chatting with my deployed husband and we were talking about the past and what not... and he mentioned to me that i "trapped" him... now being pregnant, i immediately felt as though i am not some one he loves, but he feels as though he has to... he says now i took what he said the wrong way, how would u have taken it?
2006-11-02 05:05:03 · 12 answers · asked by red.one9luv 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would have taken that statement the same way unless he was joking around. Even if he was joking that's a cruel statement. That makes you think all he feels is an obligation to "do the right thing".
2006-11-02 05:09:29 · answer #1 · answered by Lorie S 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Men have a syndrome called 'open mouth insert foot' and then we women get our feelings hurt, then hubby says thats not how I ment' it right?? Yep, I have yet to meet a man than does not have this syndrome, even my loving hubby, now I just turn it around and ask him how does that feel? And yes I did mean what I just said. This has opened his eyes and he's more aware of my feelings and in turn I try not to be what's called 'too thin skinned'. Tell your husband that your sorry you had him tied to that dolly and rolled down the isle with a gun to his head, it's something you'll always regret, smile and walk away. YOU enjoy being pregnant and all the little wonders that come with that, and when your little one is born, you'll aready be in love and your hubby will fall in love too, he cannot experience anything you are going through, baby moves and baby is real for you, but not for him yet. Good luck!!
2006-11-02 05:16:59 · answer #2 · answered by JazzyLynn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not stress over it!You mentioned he is deployed so cut him some slack. He is going through very rough times and his "reality" is much different than your reality. He is going through life and death issues and is stressing a lot.
Do not take everything he says that serious even though it might hurt at the time.
When he gets back safe and sound you can try and recap from where you left this conversation at.
Enjoy your pregnancy now and pray he gets home safe.
Good luck.
2006-11-02 05:09:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well tell him he could have refused to marry you. Anyway you do know that you did in a way trap him by getting pregnant before marriage. Swallow the hurt and keep quiet, unless you want to divorce him.
2006-11-03 00:23:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he must ve meant to say he was trapped by ur qualities.
Just that he forgot to mention that he loves this trap. and never wishes to escape.
most men love to consider themselves 'hard to get", and they would surrender to the best match only. thats all he meant. try to understand my dear. he said he is completely urs now.- as good as in a trap- he wont be able to go out from the trap of ur love. thats all :-)
2006-11-02 05:11:33 · answer #5 · answered by Amal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say he is deployed...think about the situation he is in now, we all say things depending on different moods and feelings we have. I would ignore it and more on. He is under alot of stress and may feel guilty for not being there for you and this is how he feels better, who knows men are nuts...dont worry
2006-11-02 05:11:33 · answer #6 · answered by liyah's mommy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
uh.....so he thinks he's trapped huh? wow. talk about being told "i am only with you because i forgot to put on a condem". personally, i wouldn't want to be with someone that didn't want to be with me if we didn't have children. cuz after the children are gone and grown you are now stuck with some jerk alone in a house. i was there for 7 years. i won't do that to myself again.
and uh...if this was some sort of joke....he's not a very good comedian.
2006-11-02 05:13:15 · answer #7 · answered by Bella 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would feel very hurt. Seek counseling - immediately. The military must have some counseling services available as I am sure yours is not a unique situation.
2006-11-02 05:08:52 · answer #8 · answered by meoorr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would tell him that my intentions were not to trapp him and if he felt that way he should have expressed those feelings to me before we were married. but now that i am pregnant we should stay married for the insurance and after the baby is born if he still feels he doesnt want any part of being married then we can split up.
i wouldnt want to make him be with me... and im sure that is how you feel also... i would have taken it the same way you did.
2006-11-02 05:08:40 · answer #9 · answered by becca_2 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
maybe he was just joking were yall arguing and he said that? i dont think he meant it in a way to hurt u but who knows your the only one who know how the conversation was going dont get mad at him just ask him y he said that im sure he can give u a honest answer
2006-11-02 05:07:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋