How? Cheating?

Question

How do you know when your husband is cheating on you? I am a stay at home mom with our two kids. We have been together for 6 yrs. My best friend keeps asking me if I think he is cheating on me. I don't know. Any ideas?

My best friend has been through her husband cheating on her too. She knows how my husband acts and how he's changed lately. She just wants me to keep and open mind of what might be. I told her that I think he's not, but other relatives and friends have mentioned the same thing.

Answer 1

If you don't think he is, then outside suspicions can ruin a great marriage. Don't always listen to friends and relitives if you don't have any feelings about it on your own. While sometimes they may be trying to tell you something without having to say it outright, many times it's not anything to worry about.

Is he late coming home from work on a regular basis with no overtime pay to justify it?
Does he go out on his days off without you, and doesn't tell you where he is going, who he is going with, or how long he will be?
Non-descriptive emergencies keep popping up that he needs to attend to, and you get no explanation about them.
Sex is less frequent, and he frequently turns you down when you try to initiate.
Passionate kisses have turned into brief pecks on the cheek.
He used to call you during the day, and now he doesn't. Or the phone calls are ridiculously short and to the point with little affection from his end.
Does he rush to answer the phone when it rings, and acts upset if you get to it first?
And when you do answer it, are there frequent hang ups?
Does he often tell you it was a wrong number when he gets it?
Does he walk out of the room frequently when he's on the phone, or tell you he's taking it on a phone in a different room than where he was sitting?
Does he get upset if you read emails before he has the chance to?
Does he try to hide his email account from you?
If you walk in when he's on the internet, does he get upset or quickly close things out?
Does he pick useless arguments, then storms out of the house?
Does he show you lots of affection with flowers or something, but doesn't follow the romance through to the bedroom?
Has he suddenly started shopping for new clothes, dressing up more, and/or taking more care with appearence?
Has he joined a gym, started a diet, or done something to change his looks without any benefits to you? (Like a nice dinner out together)
Are there any unexplained expenses? Like a credit card bill, or less in the bank account that what should be there, or less income that he is contributing to the household.
He suddenly becomes too accomaditing, he encourages girls nights out, large shopping sprees, or starts doing things for you he never did before. It could be a sign that he's feeling guilty, and trying to make up for it.
He suddenly becomes overly defensive. You ask him how his day went, and he flys off the handle. He may accuse you of being controlling, jealous, nagging, or obsessive.
He doesn't intorduce you to new friends that he has started spending time with.

The main thing is to pay attention to any changes in behavior. If one thing has changed, then look to see if anything else has, too. Also take into consideration if you are seeing any benefits from his changes, or if you are being left behind in his new look, style, or life. If you get suspicious, then ask him. If he's innocent, then he will be as reassuring as possible. He'll hold your hand or give you a hug and tell you how much he loves you, how he would never cheat on you, how happy he is, and how he would never screw up the great thing he's got at home. If he is guilty, then he'll loose control and accuse you of things, and act like a jerk.

Since all you have to go on is what a friend is asking, then I doubt he's cheating. If he was, you would have your own ideas, and wouldn't feel so unsure. You would be upset at the way he has been acting, and wonder why. It would be a strong nagging in your mind, and a woman's intuition can be a powerful thing. Listen to your own, search your heart, and you will find your own answers.

Answer 2

why not talk to your husband ?? I mean if there is just speculation and no communication then it cant be any good , I would talk to your man , express your concerns /fears , tell him other family and friends have made you aware of the possibillity and then see what he says . I think you will probally know if he is lying , and he may just be waiting to get caught so he can end the relationship. The only way is to talk to your husband . There may be other factors at work bothering him , or job related stress .....You need to speak honestly with your husband and dont get into the gossip game with you best friend ,

Answer 3

Just because your friend got cheated on doesn't mean the same thing is happening to you. The important thing is not what your family and friends are saying to you. What is important is that you don't think he is. If you are feeling uncomfortable about changes that he is making just talk to him about it. Don't let others make you doubt your husband.

Answer 4

Watch and learn. Is he acting different? different things in the bedroom, coming home and having a shower before anything else, smells like perfume?
Anyone tell you he is? people are not going to just make these things up to get you riled unless she's an ex that wants him back or something.
The rule of thumb.. if you feel he's cheating.. then he is. How do I know? cause women have whats called women in-stinks, you know cause you just know,and you feel it.

Answer 5

Honey if you have already got evidence he's dishonest ("So I consider my bf is dishonest doing the web factor I do have evidence, however he hides his "cookies" temp records that may hint what you're doing on-line.. ") why might you wish to retain torturing your self watching for extra proof? Just kick him to the scale down noone merits to be cheated on. I recognise its simpler stated than performed seeing that I'm certain you like him, however love your self extra. No man is ever valued at your tears.

Answer 6

You could try asking him and tell him that others wanted to know because of his actions. or you could spy, however if you have a gut feeling he is then he very well could be. i look for different things then others would look for, such as seat or seat belt on passenger side of car being out of place ciggarett butts in the ashtry with lipstick , does he come home smelling like he just showered of of parfume! there are so many ways of finding out

Answer 7

Is he coming late from work?

Does he have weekend or late night "work'?

Is he paying unsual attention to his phycal appeareance.. wearing colgne, buying new clothes, working out?

Recurrent "hung ups" on your home phone.

Does he answer his cellphone when you are present?

"forgetting" to wear his wedding band?

Is he picking on fights just to he has an excuse to get out of the house?

Does he seem anxious or in a hurry to be somewhere else when he is with you?

Check his c/c statement for unusual charges,

Check his cellphone for repetead unknown numbers, late night calls, etc.

Check his emails

Check his car for hairs or fogotten lipstick etc.

Check his thrash and pockets

Good luck

Answer 8

I would ask you friend why she thinks that at first! And 2nd i think that you would be able to tell! No one knows your husband better then you, and if he was doing something out of the ordnery you would know

Answer 9

I would ask your best friend why she keeps asking you that...maybe she knows something and can tell you. Ask your husband, he should also be able to tell you. If your best friend has no info for u, then I would ask her why she keeps asking u. I wouldn't think it is very nice of my best friend to be trying to create that kind of worry and insecurity in my marriage...maybe she's not such a best friend.

Answer 10

has he been acting too aloof from you or has he been acting too god with you? if yes then he might be. but darling you will never know. i am always suspecious and my hubby cheated on me when i least predicted it. that is the clue. he will cheat were you will never expect him to cheat. like my hubby cheated when he was in singapore with his parents. i would never suspected him cause he was with his parents but he did it when i was not expecting it. so relax. and your best friend has gone throuh a trauma and is thats why is suspecting him. the next time she asks you tell her to act as a dectective and find out if our hubby is really cheating or not.