I am 22 and my boyfriend is 30. He has two daughter's 9yrs & 4yrs. I am meeting them for the first time next Saturday after dating him for 10 months. What are some ideas we can we all four do that night that will give me a chance to get to know them and they get to know me? How do I bond with two young girls? Any ideas? Any help will will be appreciated. I looked for festivals in the West Palm Beach, FL area but there are none, what can we do??? Thanks!
2006-11-02 01:42:06 · 7 answers · asked by Jess 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
This is tough. I just went through the same thing but one thing you have going for you is that you are a woman and girls tend to get closer to you fast than that would a man. It took me almost 9 months to get over all the head ache but it was al worth it. Play some games with them that they like to play. Paint finger nails or do there hair. Take them to the park. You dont have to take them some where to have fun. Do all those girl things. But please make sure you guys talk to them and tell them that you are not tring to take there mothers place. Also, alot will depend on how long him and his ex had been divorced. That will make a big different. Good luck on the meeting. I hope all goes well. Just try not to push to hard to be there friend.
Also, Alway include the kids in everything that you do. Never leave them out. I know we say we wouldn't but it's not hard to do.
2006-11-02 01:48:16 · answer #1 · answered by bigdog_0032 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can take some gifts for them. Talk to them about them like you make new friends. Just be a kid like them and play with them, talk to them. Make sure that you make them feel secure with you and that they will enjoy their time with you. Just leave a great impression on them, so that next time they would call you before you call them. Hope this works. All the best.
2006-11-02 09:46:56 · answer #2 · answered by Paritosh Vasava 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't try to bond. They'll think you're trying to replace their mom. Just be quiet and helpful. It's really time supposed to be spent with their dad, not you. Remember, you're the add-on just now, if you bond with them, and things don't work out with him, you'll loose them and they will loose you. Don't do this to them or you. I think your boyfriend (manfriend) should be ashamed to try to infuse you into their life when you're clearly too young to have any true commitment.
I'm not trying to be mean, but I'm being raw about the facts at hand.
2006-11-02 09:52:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel, I have two stepdaughters and believe me in the beginning it was not all that fun,
You are a young lady and there is one thing you have going for you, my two daughters were like 3 yrs-old and 5 yrs-old but now they are 11 yrs-old & 9 yrs-old and they love me with all of their hearts as I to do love them with all my love.
When we first met they thought two ways:
1st YOU are trying to take momma's place,
2nd YOU are trying to take daddy away from them,
Now we know that is not the truth, we just want to be a part of their lives that's all, so the thing you have to do is actually get to know them and treat them like two different people because they are,
Do not force them to talk to you, when you let them come to you, they seem to do it from the heart, see children are not mean bad little things if anything, they are just the oppisite of that, children are pure at heart, and they know when you really care about them or if you are just trying to use them to make "Daddy" like you more.
You have to be true in your heart that you really want to get to know them, like you have to spend time with them just the three of you all, do things with them, take them places, just riding a bike with them is fun for a kid you know?
It will not happen over night believe that because see they have to make sure that you are not just coming through, you have to listen to them honestly, hear the things they tell you, and share with you. It's not about where you take them but what you do with them is what really they care about...........................I hope this helps you.....................................................
2006-11-02 09:54:44 · answer #4 · answered by Lil Angel 68 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could take everyone to a movie and then dinner afterwards so you all could talk. Maybe find out what they like so you could talk to them about that or take them to a certain event they might enjoy (baseball game if they like baseball, art museum if they like art...etc)
2006-11-02 09:46:55 · answer #5 · answered by Yanks4Life23519 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to Orlando, Florida and go to one of the many theme parks they have there. Disney, Epcot, Sea World.
Just be yourself and the girls will love you. If he does they will.. Good Luck!!!
2006-11-02 09:44:54 · answer #6 · answered by Clints_wench 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk with them find out their interest.
2006-11-02 09:48:20 · answer #7 · answered by Arthur D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋