Ok, I am 22 and been married for a little over a year. We were together over 4 years before marriage. Anyway, I was looking in my drawer for a condum. I just had my 3rd child 6 weeks ago and my husband and I don't want anymore kids for a while and I havn't gotten my birth control yet. Well I needed the condum for something. The pack was a 3 pack. We used 2 ourselves and the 3rd one was no where to be found. I searched in every drawer, I looked behind the dresser, I went downstairs, then back upstairs looking. Mind you my husband was on the couch looking stupid the whole time. I said, "Where the hell is the 3rd condum?" on my way back upstairs. He said, "It ain't up there..." When I came back downstairs he said, "If you must know, I used it to jack off." I was like, "Oh..." Then I thought about it, what a damn retard to tell me something so stupid and expect me to believe it. Men don't jack off with condums, do they? That makes NO SINCE! I feel like just goin out and cheatin on his ***.
2006-11-01 15:44:46 · 18 answers · asked by mizzladyariel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ok, just to clear some things up. He has never used a condum to jack off before. We are open about that. And someone said lubrication in a condom?? Well that may be true, but KY jelly comes in a bottle and we have some. Oh and he used the "messy" line as well. In that case he should have just said something instead of having me run around the house looking for it. I'm sure I shouldn't cheat but that is how I feel. Now knowing these extra details, what would you do?
2006-11-01 16:01:58 · update #1
What ever your VERY FIRST INSTINCT WAS......THAT is your answer. We as women have those instincts for a reason. And most times you SUSPECT something, it is almost always the case. But what do we do............go around HELPING him find excuses for it. You know deep down what is up. But........you have a choice to make.
You either let it go, and take it at face value. (Because if he IS cheating.....it WILL come out. You know that. In time it WILL come out.) OR keep prying, and getting on him and you will find it, or he will get caught up in his lie........and THEN what? What are you prepared to DO about it? Cause if you don't DO something about it, then not only will it continue......but it will be WORSE because he will have learned that there is no consequence, like it is a freebie, and it's cool to do because he won't have you making him 'pay' for it.
so..........let it go. OR........get to the bottom of it.......but ONLY if you are willing to follow it up with action.
2006-11-01 17:00:30 · answer #1 · answered by lilac b 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think u have 3 children and u have been together for 5 yrs or so, if misplacing a condum after that many years would make u maybe think about cheating instead of believing him then maybe there is a little more to the story. i think u should be sure of something before throwing away all that u have. remember something, u can say your sorry for the rest of your life but u can never take something u say or do back. . good luck!
2006-11-02 00:29:31 · answer #2 · answered by Shelley R 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I'm a 38 y/o male who's been happily married for over 6
years. My sex drive is higher than that of my wife (big surprise
there, I know). Because of this, I masturbate 2 to 3 times a week.
Every so often, I'll do it with a condom on. Since I don't have to
worry about breakage, I'll put on the rubber and then lube my shaft up real good with baby oil. You'd be surprised by the intensity of the orgasms I've experienced from this!
So, is your husband lying? Not neccessarily.
2006-11-02 03:09:57 · answer #3 · answered by DW 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Cheating? Good Grief... That's pretty "weak"... If that is how your relationship rolls for the both of you than I would say that he probably used it to prevent a pregnancy.
Could he have chosen to use it for the lubrication? The hand will slide better w/it lubricated.... So, he could be telling you the truth and if I were you I'd ask him about it further before making such assumptions and going off the wall.
Ask him WHY he felt the need to use a condom....
It also could be that it'll prevent a mess.... much cleaner for him AND with lubrication....
Talk to him FIRST but don't go flying off the wall just yet.... And cheating is the last thing that should have run through your mind....
2006-11-01 23:53:47 · answer #4 · answered by ~Me~ 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Cheating on him is not the answer. I know from presonally experience. Even thought my first husband cheated on me and then I cheated on him and ended up telling him about it because I thought he knew. He didn't want to forgive me like a forgave him. Even though I took revenge it finished distroying a troubled marriage. My husband now said that men do masterbate with condums because it is less messy he has done it. Even if you don't believe him you have to decide is your disblief worth destroying your marriage?? If you think that he is lying to you you should tell him your feelings and try to reslove it. If he is still insistant that this is what happened and you still don't believe him then you have only two choices. Resolve it yourself and move on. Or not resolve it and destroy your marriage. Is your relationship really worth that?? Think about what it will do to your kids. Even thought I am on my second marriage and completly happy and my son cares alot about his step-dad it was very hard for my son to except the fact that his dad and I were getting a divorce. Even though my first husband said he wanted a divorce I figured if he wanted a divorce he could pay for it. It wasn't untill I was with my second husband that I got a divorce. I did it because I knew that I couldn't give my second husband my heart until I had divorced my first husband. Btw my first husband tried to say he was raped. I new the truth. My first husband and Ii still have contact and we get along. My second husband and I even do things with my ex and my son.
2006-11-02 00:04:12 · answer #5 · answered by lita ozzy bear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No sweetie! Men don't even like to use condoms for sex do you really think they're going to use one to jack off? That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard!
On the other hand, for you to run out and cheat would also be WRONG! Try to get to the bottom of the missing condom issue but don't take your focus off of what should be the most important thing in your life right now - your new baby!
God bless you honey! I hope everything works out for you!
2006-11-01 23:51:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
YOURSELF SOOUR GUT INSTINCT. I HAVE NEVER KNOWN A MAN TO USE A CONDOM TO JACK OFF THIS IS MY FIRST HEARING OF THIS.MEN DON'T EVEN WANT TO USE A CONDOM FOR SEX LET ALONG MASTURBATION. I DON'T THINK SO. THEN TO LET YOU GO BACK AND FORWARD LOOKING FOR IT. AND TO COME UP WITH THAT LAME A $$ EXCUSE.
YOU NEED TO ASK BECAUSE YOU KNOW HOW THE SAYING GOES WHEN YOU ASSUME YOU MAKE AN A$$ OUT OF YOURSELF
SO YOU NEED TO COME OUT AND ASK HIM STRAIGHT UP DID YOU USE THE CONDOM WITH SOMEONE ELSE
AND ASK HIM WHY DID HE HAVE YOU LOOKING FOR IT IF HE KNEW THAT HE ALREADY USED IT.
AND ANOTHER THING DON'T CHEAT. YOU DON'T REALLY KNOW WHAT HAPPEN (YET) WHATEVER THAT IS DONE IN THE DARK WILL COME TO THE LIGHT.
I HOPE I HAVE BEEN A HELP TO YOU
2006-11-02 00:35:52 · answer #7 · answered by Kay 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, they dont. It just took him that long to come up with that sorry BS.
You dont have to cheat on him. Just make sure he knows you buy another pack, use one then take one out and throw it in the trash. The next time he goes for a condom, he will be expecting to see 2 and there will only be one. What he wont know will drive him friggin nuts.
2006-11-01 23:48:41 · answer #8 · answered by JC 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No, I have never known a man to jack off wearing a condom, since they usually hate them. So no, I wouldn't believe him. But two wrongs don't make a right. Don't cheat on him just to get even. I would confront him and ask him straight out if he's cheating. Listen very carefully to what he says and his reaction to your question.
2006-11-01 23:54:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i wouldn't cheat on him because it won't make you feel any better. I would make him think you were doing something though. Play his game and i also would suggest leaving him. Do you want to raise your children with a cheater? Tell him do you think i am stupid, so who did you use the condom with. I bet i would follow him or something. I cheated on my husband once but was up front about it from the begginning and he was gone for six months when it happened. He forgave me but i wouldn't cheat on him again.
2006-11-01 23:56:00 · answer #10 · answered by mistiful2001 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋