Sorry if I sound so repeated, but: I feel so left out because I as well have never had a boyfriend and it seems like everyone else in the world has, or at least has had someone like them are flirting with them- a LOT. I'm not the type who'll just walk up to a guy and ask him out. And I'm very well aware that I'm very young, I'm thirteen. The first things on my mind in school are my friends and well, learning, believe it or not, but there's always that little voice in the back of my head desperately wanting to experiance it just once, and it won't leave. Especially at dances. What can I do to stop feeling this way? I really don't want to make a fool of myself and throw myself and random guys, but I don't like this feeling at all.
2006-11-01 14:41:24 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Hi ;
Try to talk with that little voice of yours and make a nice and logical conversation with. Don't give her wrong and try to get familiar with her....! Tell her you're still young for intercoursing & make some agreements or arrangements about what should be done ; maybe you'd come up with some decisions, like kissing boys or similar conduct, but tell voice how miserable should her be if you decided to move forth over intercourse!!!
I am serious about it ; no kidding. Just try it with good will and in
some safe place, where you won't be interrupted by others!
Good luck!
Ciao........John-John.
2006-11-03 11:35:17 · answer #1 · answered by John-John 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I speak from experience (not THAT much experience, i'm only 16 and still going through this akward, self-depricating period) but some experience when I say it will be alright. When i was thirteen not all that long ago, I was probably the most akward person in existence. Yes, it bothered me that I never had a boyfriend and such, but i kind of grew out of it. Now that I'm older (and STILL don't have a boyfriend) I realize the importance of teenage relationships is much more status-based than understanding-based. Believe me, any guy that would go out with you now, at age 13, would only so they could say "I have a girlfriend!", and these boys are never the ones to stick with. Even at my age, the smart boys, the ones worth dating are hesitant. I guess you just have to realize that it's alright and that when the time is right, "he" will come to you.
PS- Dances are nothing to feel weird about!! Have fun, dance with your girlfriends, and see if you can coax a boy into dancing with you. It's not that akward once you start. They're probably just as scared, if not more, as you.
2006-11-02 05:02:38 · answer #2 · answered by sam s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh wow, what a flashback. Believe it or not, you are feeling much like all 13 year old girls feel and have felt. Your time will come, I promise. Meantime, unfortunately there isn't a lot you can do to change the way you are feeling, because it is a part of you that needs to develop and mature as well as the rest of your body. You don't just wake up one day and think, okay now it's time to go find Mr. Right and get married. You kind of have to grow into that frame of mind. What you have now is the beginnings of the feelings that will eventually lead you to form the relationships which eventually may lead you to find Mr. Right and settle down. It's taken you 13 years to get this far, and obviously it needs to take at least that long to reach that last step.
13 year old guys are rather over-rated anyway, as I recall. They are just as clumsy and odd-feeling as you are now. Most of them wouldn't recognize a flirt if it bit them anyway, and are mighty fearful of girls. There's nothing to keep you from asking a fellow to dance, in fact, most of them will need at least that much encouragement at the start. You don't have to throw yourself at any of them, just smile and talk like you are normal people and let things progress from there. There is no magic formula to attract a boy, most of them will react if you just act normally as usual. In fact, they won't know what to do if you act otherwise and it will just make them squirm to get away.
I know, it's tough advice to say just relax. But it's really the only thing that will work. You will eventually, and in your own good time, find a boyfriend. In the meantime, concentrate on those things which interest you and don't spend a lot of time worrying about the rest. If there is a boy around that wants to get involved, and you want to get involved, then let it happen. Otherwise, don't stress over it. Yeah, some girls will brag about having a boyfriend. And that's fine, but you don't need a boyfriend to be a normal person, certainly not a normal girl. It's more important right now for you to be doing the things you really want to do, and being with people that you want to be with than to spend it stressing over if that person is a boy or girl. A boyfriend may be the fashion accessory of your age group, but who wants some lousy boyfriend to stress over just to have one?
Tell your little voice to hush. You are normal, absolutely. You'll get a boyfriend when you decide you want one, when there's one worth having, and not just because it's the accessory of the moment. I mean, boys are all fine and good- but really, not necessary for a while. Find your own path, and if some boy wants to walk along side, fine. If not, that's fine too. As long as your heads on straight- and it sure sounds like yours is - the smart boys worth having will show up soon enough.
2006-11-01 23:05:22 · answer #3 · answered by The mom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I remember feeling the exact same way at that age. Im 30 now. Dont worry about any of that stuff. Obviously you know you are too young anyways, and any kind of relationship at this age isnt going to last anyways.I always thought I would never get a boyfriend. I met my husband when I was 16 and we married several years later. Just focus on school right now and you will get a boyfriend when the time is right. You dont need that kind of drama in your life at this young of an age. Because trust me, it brings drama and heart break.
2006-11-01 22:49:15 · answer #4 · answered by Blondi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand where you are coming from. I was the same way when I was a teenager. Just be patient. I was and now I have the greatest husband ever and we just had our first child. We met when we were fifteen and neither of us had the courage to act on anything so we slowly got to know each other and then it just got more and more comfortable and we decided we were good together. Ten years later I cant imagine my life without him. It will happen for you too. Dont rush it and dont settle. You deserve to be truly happy and thats worth waiting for
2006-11-01 22:50:14 · answer #5 · answered by ragezgurl27 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel.I am 12 and feel the same way.I know that this is one way of handling a feeling.Go to www.newground.com and do one of the games it is about doting and you will learn more.
2006-11-02 04:45:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋