my bff has become obsessed with her boyfriend that she's been going out with for months now. they are together soo much. they have lunch together, he switched into her english class, and they are together outside of school ALL the time. they see each other a few times a week out of school, they talk on AIM alot, they comment each others myspace a lot and they talk on the phone at least twice a day. i'm happy for her, and i'm glad she's found someone she really loves. but she's forgetting about her friends. she and i used to talk all the time and hang out. but now its allllll about her boyfriend. i don't even like to eat lunch with her like i used to, cause she never talks to me, or pays attention to me, she's just making out with her boyfriend. should i talk to her about how wrapped up she is in her bf? or just let it go?? i feel like if i DON'T talk to her, i'll lose her as a friend. please help!
2006-11-01 13:35:55 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
What you are going through with your friend is common. She's in love & going to spend every minute she can with her bf. Unfortunately that means less time for you. You need to bring it to her attention that she's neglecting you, that you feel left out & abandoned. Ask her if you could have just 1 day a week with her. Maybe if you could get her to spend some time with you she would remember how much fun the 2 of you used to have & start spending less time with him and more with you.
2006-11-01 13:39:57 · answer #1 · answered by Michelle *The Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that maybe you should mention something because if she is that way now then she will let the guy rule her later on in life and she could end up like one of those women that can't have a life. And plus, it might be the guy. I know all about what you are going through. I went through it with a best friend when she was with a guy that would not let her leave his house to talk to anybody. Now she left him because she finally opened her eyes when he made her have an abortion. She is married to a nice guy and now we are able to talk after several years. All I am saying is that, yeah talk to her, but try not to make it seem like YOU are the one being possessive. Let her know that you like seeing her happy but also let her know that there is more in the world then men. Men already have big egos and do not need anymore of it.
2006-11-01 13:43:31 · answer #2 · answered by nemochik1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You wont lose her as a friend. Ask her if you guys can have one night a week for girlfriends night so you can have some fun without the boys. I know you feel left out but this happens when someone finds a new love. Tell her you miss her and that your feeling kind of pushed to the side since she started dating this guy. I'm sure she will understand. Maybe you can focus on something else to get your mind off this. Maybe another friend to hand out with---remember, you can have more than one friend. Have some fun !! Good luck!
2006-11-01 13:40:58 · answer #3 · answered by CTMEDS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't force someone to pay attention to you and if you mention it, you will seem pathetic and jealous.
While it is true, with some boyfriends, friendships get set aside, but hang on, she'll need you again. Keep busy, ask a guy out for lunch - just as friends and see what happens.
2006-11-01 13:44:05 · answer #4 · answered by chris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know this feeling all too well. You have to tell her that this is bothering you, it is the only way. But don't be confrontational or rude, just tell her that you feel hurt you guys don't hang out like you used to. If she gets pissy about it, then it would be best for you find new friends to hang out with. True friends won't do this to you though. They will try to find a balance to make all the people they care about happy, including themselves. Good luck!!
2006-11-01 13:56:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the best thing for you to do is let her enjoy her time with her bf. If you say something she may never speak to you again.Likely start being happy for her like making new friends or hang out with the ones you have. Most importantly be happy for.
2006-11-01 13:41:40 · answer #6 · answered by shamiz_kamani 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately this is the way it goes. When she has an arguement with him and starts to fight she will come back to you to discuss things. Love dies, friendships last forever. I think everyone does this. One way to stay friends is to go out together, with your boyfriend and your friend and her boyfriend.
2006-11-01 13:47:24 · answer #7 · answered by Alan L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would pull her aside when you two have time and just have like a little 1 on 1 chat and tell her how you feel... and then if she gets mad then just like start talking to her more during lunch and stuff..
2006-11-01 13:42:28 · answer #8 · answered by ɫɦɾouɡɦ ɫɦɛ ɛɣɛʂ oʄ ɫɦɛ ɑvɛɴɢɛd 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should tell your friend how you feel but don't make her choose between you or yourn fiends and if she still does it after you tell her how you feel then she's not a good friend.
2006-11-01 13:42:18 · answer #9 · answered by maxxie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her how u feel...but dont sound jealous...b/c then u could loose your friendship....
2006-11-01 13:53:58 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋