My friend recently divorced his wife of ten years. He had an affair - he said his wife and him had grown apart and his needs were not being met in the relationship. He is moving in with the other woman next month. He has only been seeing her 7 months and divorced only 3. I am worried about him. This woman is the total opposite of his ex. He seems to have forgotten about his kids. He spends very little time with them. He seems to be totally wrapped up in this woman. He even says that his relationship is a lot better than the one with his ex because he can go out and have fun whenever he wants. I guess he forgot that his ex is home with the kids. This new woman even tells him how to dress! Is this normal behaviour for a newly divorced man? I want to tell him to slow down but it will do no good - he is not listening. Then he makes comments about how it will hurt when his ex moves on. I think the guy is living in a dream world that is going to come crashing down. What do I say to him?
2006-11-01 08:50:42 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She ahs him wrapped around her finger. He thinks he is a "bachelor" and living it up now that he is newly single, like a monkey out of a cage.
You can tell him that family comes first and that gf are temporary, the love and respect of his kids are forever and should take priority over everything else.
But don't waste your time, he is thinking with his pecker.
Good luck
2006-11-01 08:59:46 · answer #1 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is said that every newly divorced person has a "transition partner" who brings them back into the world of being single. They learn how to have great sex again. They learn another person's habits. They pretty much fall in love. Unfortunatley, the relationship usually lasts only until the newly separated/divorced person is back on their feet as a single person. But, they then go on to form other relationships that lead to mature love.
2006-11-01 09:08:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately it won't matter what you say. He is living the fantasy right now and you are probably right it is going to come crashing down. That is when you can step in and pick up the pieces. Men can make such fools of themselves over women and vice versa.
He is an adult and is responsible for his actions. Just help him figure out how to fix everything when he comes to his senses.
2006-11-01 08:55:37 · answer #3 · answered by Christina 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, there could desire to be a "falling in love" era. undergo in concepts that conversing approximately marriage is an age-previous ploy to get a female into mattress. They wish the female will think of "why no longer, we are getting married besides". some adult men are in basic terms too lazy to prepare dinner for themselves, look after themselves, or the placement the place they stay. some omit the intimacy. some are some distance happier divorced, and stay that way.
2016-10-21 02:44:02 · answer #4 · answered by hosford 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are right he will come crashing down. but i don't think there is really anything you can do to wake him. it will have to be something drastic with his kids i bet. it is kinda normal for a newly divorced person to go through a rebirth . going out and having fun when they couldn't and finding someone who is really different from their ex is also normal. he will come to his senses though. i just hope it isn't something really bad that snaps him back
2006-11-01 08:57:51 · answer #5 · answered by beckdawgydawg 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you say nothing to him. you said your self that he is not listening.
be there as a friend when his world crashes down on him, but say nothing. i can't tell you if it's normal behavior, but i know other divorced men that did very similar things. all you can do is hope that he realizes how much his kids mean to him. other than that, he's a grown man, he can make his own decisions and mistakes.
2006-11-01 08:56:36 · answer #6 · answered by bmoline 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think at first they believe they just want freedom to do whatever they want, they want to relieve their college days and have no worrries. I think sooner or later that fantasy will run out and he will miss what he had left and then it will be to late. You will have to be there for him, you can tell him how you feel about the situation but he will just do what he wants. Just be there when it all comes crashing down.
2006-11-01 08:56:16 · answer #7 · answered by schell_75 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First wives need to get over themselves......he probably feels alive again because this new woman is better suited for him, doesn't nag, etc.....there are a lot of crappy wives out there...they might not even realize they are crappy.......this guy is in heaven, because that is the way his girlfriend is making him feel.....as long as he sends his child support, its no ones damn business what he does....
PS...no, I do NOT agree with his cheating...but that is water under the bridge...because now he is divorced......
2006-11-01 09:03:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
you just going to have to let his dream come crushing down on him the only thing you can do is be there if he needs you
2006-11-01 09:02:50 · answer #9 · answered by waiting for baby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him live in his dream and eventually his bubble will break and he will see the reality of life (hopefully) unless he is just stupid.
2006-11-01 11:55:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋