Does it ever stop hurting?

Question

I just saw my ex-husband. He came into the place where I work - as a customer- and I had to help him.....it was so weird. I could hardly even function.
We were together for 15 years- we have been apart for more than 3 years- but the pain is so deep- it feels as if it only happened yesterday.
I could see it in his face too- I think it still hurts him. We have both moved on and are in new (serious) relationships. But I have to be honest - I still love this man in ways I don't even understand - and it hurts so much!!!
AAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!
When does the hurting stop?!!! How do I let go???
Anyone else been in this situation that can offer any advice that might help ease this emotional torture?????

Answer 1

face it, you did have good times with your x before spliting up.we all have..its normal to feel the love you once had...

Something Specially
For You

I said a prayer for you today
And know God must have heard-
I felt the answer in my heart
Although He spoke no word!
I didn't ask for wealth or fame
(I knew you wouldn't mind)-
I asked Him to send you treasures
Of a far more lasting kind!
I asked that He'd be near you
At the start of each new day
To grant you health and blessings
And my friendship to share your way
I asked for happiness for you
In all things great and small-
But it was for His loving care
I prayed the most of all.

By: Kenny P. aka-Cobra

Answer 2

Well I can say it still hurts for me too. I have been going through a divorce that I did not want. She did some awful things to me and for some reason I want her back so badly. The hurt isn't as painful and frequent as it was...but it is still there. I imagine it could possibly never go away. How do you feel about the person in this new relationship? Is he giving you everything you need? Is he not giving you what you got from your ex-husband that you love so much about him? Maybe when you find someone who can fullfil some of those empty spaces will the hurting stop. I think relationships are a scary flippin ride and they can end in heart ache. Hang in there and I hope the hurting stops, I really do.

Answer 3

Well, I can't say I've been in your situation. My ex-husband and I were only together (as a couple) for a few years and married for a year. He cheated on me during the course of our relationship and, eventually, this ended our marriage as well when I learned he was having an affair. Therefore, I do not what it's like to hurt and want to get over someone you love and have no reason as to why. It took me three years to get over this hurt enough to trust another man, but eventually, I was able to move forward. It wasn't easy, in fact it was one of the hardest things I had to do. Broken hearts just take time to mend. Be patient with yourself and things will eventually get better.

Answer 4

If you were truly in love, which it seems to me you still are, it doesn't go away. Love just doesn't go away. But it will slowly start fading and not be so strong and wont hurt as bad. But the best thing to do is to move on like you have. Try and put those feelings to use with your guy now. Its not really fair to him that you are struggling so hard with your divorce after three years. It could cause problems with you two. But it is just my opinion so good luck. I have been there before though. Still am. Still love my ex, always will, but I am more in love with my guy now so it just works. I hope it does for you too.

Answer 5

I have been there...in fact, every time he picks up the kids it hurts to a certain degree. When I start feeling this way, all I have to do is think of why we got divorced. And yes, there is a little pain there BUT it is so much better than the pain there was when we were together. Remember, there is a reason you are divorced...something did not work. Keep that in mind...that is what helps me. Hang in there!

Answer 6

I didn't had a 15 year old relationship with a girl , but I'm only 16 and yet it hurts me allot when i break up with some girl ,even i try to look hard as a rock . I guess the best thing to do is look to the future , forget the past , it will only hurt you, but don't be afraid of your feelings , don't lock them into your heart , speak with friends , with your current man , even with your ex , and things might solve .

Answer 7

15 years is a long time to love someone and then suddenly stop. I am sure that you will love him forever. The pain should lessen as time goes on. I would ask him to stop coming into your place of work. If he still hurts as you suspect, then he should respect your wishes.

Answer 8

hard to deal with when one from the past returns like that. but i would never let him see it. i would speak an deal with him in a friendly way. and this hard face you put on , may help you feel strong around him. tell yourself what you have now is better than he will ever be to you. because he is an ex for some reason.

Answer 9

It lasts forever and some days is worse than you have yet experienced. You should have made sure he was well catered for sexually and emotionally, did not nag so much and gave hime EVERYthing he wanted anywhere anyplace anytime anyhow....because now you regret it, are stuck with tthat boring loser and he is having the sex of his life......oh!! watch that weight it has a habit of creeping on when depressed

Answer 10

3 years is a long time not to be over someone. Have told him how you feel? Who know he maybe feeling the same way too. Try talking to him to see if he is thinking the same as you.