well this is the situation:my ex has a new girlfriend and he says he's happy,but i found out yesterday from his friend that he is concerned about michael because he has started cutting himself since about 2 weeks now.This week he cut himself and came to school with cut marks.he did that once before and he was suicidal on the verge of it.me and him really don't talk much almost none but the only time he wasn't rude to me was when he told me he cheated on me,and then that weekend he cut himself.well we might not be together and might not be friends but i truly want to help him out.if he would be happy why would he cut himself?the problem is i don't know how to approach him about it and i don't know if he'll be rude to me?i also don't know if he wants to talk to someone or how to get him to talk to me?i am not sure if i should bug in and do something or just pretend i don't know anything?it concerns and worries plus i cry all night because i care and it makes me sad.Help!!!
2006-11-01 06:09:33 · 19 answers · asked by jenny 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
well we really don't talk at all mostly but what i realized was that the day he told me he cheated he told me he was sorry but then he paused and finally said that he was happy.he is on yahoo answers too and maybe he will read that but i don't know if i can talk to him cuz he is my ex fiance and i still kinda care plus i don't want to rat out his friend.what does that mean?why did he stop and then told me he was happy and why is he sorry bout cheating if he is happy with her?
2006-11-01 06:23:15 · update #1
i really don't and can't talk to his family and i am a cancer and i care about people but there is the fact that i mite have feelings somewhat left for him.he has depression i know that but why is his girlfriend not doing something about it if i would be his girlfriend and he would cut himself i would do something but she seems to do nothing.people tell me that they don't look like they're in love even one of his friends.he did tell my mom that he has depression and i saw that when i was together with him.
2006-11-01 06:29:34 · update #2
He could be cutting himself due to many factors-family problems,problems at school,problems with his gurl etc...Try to find out from his frnds if der is anything else dats bugging him.Do you know his girlfrnd-y not talk to her and find out if ders any problems between dem(you may never know mayb she wants to talk to some1 about the same).Its obvious that u really care about him so y not jus go ahead and talk to him.Ask him if u can talk to him alone after school or something and if u cant ask him face to face jus call and ask him...C'mon it really does not matter if he scolds you or plainly ignores you.If u really care about him give it a try cause u may never know-u plainly talking to him may help him a lot and u will feel alot better.
P.S:-U may never know he may actually be in love with u and must be regretting d fact dat he brk up with u...and u going and talking to him will brk d ice between u guys-
tc
2006-11-01 06:28:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Normally females are the cutters, but I have seen some guys do this too. It is the sign of a serious mental illness and he needs professional help. Be happy that you are not his girlfriend. Your life will be easier without him in it. Find a health guy to spend your life with. This one will be trouble for most of his life. Cutting is not the same as having suicidal thoughts. It is the sign of another problem, even more serious and pervasive. Many normal people have suicidal thoughts in their life because of depression or some event, but this is different.
2006-11-01 06:17:58 · answer #2 · answered by tonks_op 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Caitlyn... This is the most important lesson you will ever learn in your life, as far as relationships go... MOST communication is nonverbal. Way more than 99% in fact. Read those last two sentences over and over again. If you try to talk to him and he gets quiet and blushes...that is nonverbal communication. He likes you. He REALLY likes you. He might even be in love with you. See, when you have really strong feelings for somebody, those feelings often cause you to shut down a bit. It's almost like you lose your ability to talk, briefly. Also, the way he shook your hand is also very powerful nonverbal communication. Your touch affects him greatly. He's almost afraid to touch you, as your skin on his skin has a very powerful effect on him. How do you to tell him you like him, and how do you find out if he likes you? Simple, really. Don't talk to him. Or if you do talk to him, avoid the subjects of how you feel about him and how he feels about you. You are actually kinda sorta doing the right thing without even trying. See, you need to touch him. Regularly and frequently. Keep in mind that when you touch him, that is a form of communication. If you touch him CORRECTLY, then you will be conveying messages that are hard to put in actual words, anyway. If you really like him, you have to initiate physical contact. That doesn't mean kiss him or anything like that. Especially in a church setting...you need to be careful. But look for any excuse to touch him. Sign of peace. Or just give him a hug sometime, out of the blue. Look for an excuse. If he helps you with something, give him a hug as a thank you... Accidentally lean against him in a crowded room. "accidentally", ha ha... Give him a back/neck/shoulder massage. Straighten out his hair for him. Whatever. If you touch him often enough and on a regular basis, two things will happen... 1) He's already in love with you (I suspect) but if he isn't there yet, then touching him will make him fall in love with you 2) if you touch him frequently, he will get the message (loud and clear) that you "like" him a lot. And you won't need to say a word. OK, so eventually, the two of you will probably discuss (in words) your feelings for each other. But your entire life (not just in your teens) most of your significant communication with your boyfriends will be nonverbal. Touch him...
2016-05-23 03:54:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First let him know that cheating on you doesn't matter ,that you care more about whats going on with him. Sound to me like some kind of depression .And needs medical help. See if he will at least talk to the school councilor.Are speak to them yourself and ask it to stay confidential.
2006-11-01 06:19:29 · answer #4 · answered by martha g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a really serious problem, especially if he has cut himself and felt suicidal before. confront him, letting him know you care about him and aren't doing it to annoy him. if he doesn't respond get help from an adult. he wont like you presently, but eventually he will thank you and you need to know you are doing the right thing. for more information on this go to /kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/mental_health/cutting.html
2006-11-01 06:17:54 · answer #5 · answered by sweetybabe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
mmm tough one is is home life a loveing one does e get along with is family or could u have a word with is mum or dad and tell them your fears and ask them how he is at home and ask them to keep a eye on him at least u r doing some thing good luck hun hope it works out and stop worrying to much it might be a sympathy thing to make people notice him
2006-11-01 06:23:02 · answer #6 · answered by christina b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depression!!! Learn about it and then you can understand how u can get him help and be his supporter. there are groups for these things. He could be bipolor...they may foooll you as being happy, happy, but deep down sad, lonely...look into it and do something instead of being on the side lines
2006-11-01 06:14:26 · answer #7 · answered by csabrinam 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you still care deeply for thisman cutting is a form of self release and deep mentalhealth problems if you could ask his friend to ring the smaritons or mind there are offices through out the country in your in england us i dont know
2006-11-01 06:19:36 · answer #8 · answered by gold_jc_taz 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go up to him and ask if you can talk. Let him know that you still care and are concerned. Be there if he needs to talk with someone. If he doesnt, at least you tried.
2006-11-01 06:14:31 · answer #9 · answered by gary t 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get him some professional help. Don't just pretend it's not happening. Post this on the social science pshycology section too.
2006-11-01 06:12:52 · answer #10 · answered by missgigglebunny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋