Okay, I am married, it is a decent marriage, no arguments, or fuss, we see eye to eye on most things.
We dont spend much time together, he has a demanding job, I am at home with 3 kids, & one on the way.
As some people might joke, sex is barely exsistant after a certin point in the relationship.
As in mine.
Now he hasnt touched me in so long, I wonder why? My horomones have took my limbado away for thew moment so I kind of just ignore it.
Now dont men want sex? Or is it he works so much he doesnt have the energy?????
2006-11-01 04:38:00 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
More than likely he is just tired. Talk to him and tell him how are you feeling it sounds like your in a great and healthy relationship. Just let him know that you would like him to make more of an effort to these kinds of things. Take some initiative and wear something seductive and do a romantic setting with candles and music. Try to get a baby sitter just do somethings to light his and your fire again. Go down on him when the kids are asleep and arose him. The fire does die down after being together for so long but that just means that you have work harder at rekindling it.
2006-11-01 04:46:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know, it's difficult to say what is going on. I wouldn't jump to conclusions and assume "cheating" right away - it could be that after you not having been very receptive for a while he had simply given up. I think, stress affects men more than they sometimes care to admit. Yes, the stereotype is that men are "always up for it", but I don't think this is necessarily true in real life. Pressures rise with each additional child, I am sure he's feeling great responsibility for his family, and it's not as easy to "get in the mood" when all you want to do at the end of a long day is relax and not think about anything else for a short while. Did his sex drive change abrutly, was it a gradual decline, or has he never been very sexually "driven"? Abrut change may indicate that something different IS going on, but gradual decline is more or less natural, and if his sex drive has never been particularly high - it could be his hormone level or something like this.
2006-11-01 04:48:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Before you start thinking about him cheating look at any other signs. You say he works long hours but does he call you throughout the day are you communicating and connecting as a couple or life just revolves around your kids? Have you caught him cheating in the past? Unfortunately there's no way of just telling off the bat if someone's cheating only you know your marriage and you know if he's changed or not. Think about whether or not you trust him and if your marriage needs work you might want to consider counseling to help you guys talk things out and bring you closer toguether. There's always room for improvement even if your marriage is decent you can make it great.
2006-11-01 04:43:49 · answer #3 · answered by honey27 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am in the same situation. You cannot compare your sex life to other marriages - if he is not showing much interest, and you are too tired, that is totally ok. Many marriages are like that. With 3 kids and his job, I am not surprised.
My husband and I have little time for sex, but I believe this will let up as the kids get older. I asked my husband about his "lack of willingness" and he said he wanted sex, but he was tired all the time (as am I). I know he is not having an affair, so I am cool with that. I don't know your husband, but if you are fairly sure he is not screwing around (and there are many OTHER clues that would fill you in on that) I would not worry about it.
Marriages go thru phases. Keep the faith.
2006-11-01 05:47:22 · answer #4 · answered by geekgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Sex is barely existant" you say? Yet you have 3 kids and one on the way? Okay, had to get that out of my system.
Tell him how you're feeling and ask him "Why?" You'll never find out anything if you don't ask. Was he like this on your previous pregnancies? A decent marriage, believe it or not, could also include arguing and difference of opinions as long as you're HAPPY being with the person you're married to. Does he look happy? Don't be afraid to ask him if he's happy. Everyone gets tired from time to time, but you can still be happy and tired. Are YOU happy? TALK to him, that is the best thing you can do to find out what is wrong. Don't accept his "I'm just tired" answer, have him vent a little steam.
2006-11-01 04:55:08 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depending on his age, his testosterone level may be the problem. As men get older the level drops and they aren't as interested in sex as they once were. I know my hubby, at 51, doesn't seem to care half the time whether we have sex or not, which is totally opposite from 10 years ago when we couldn't get enough. Stress at work could play a big roll as well. Try initiating sex yourself and if he doesn't respond then you should find out why. Lots of luck and congrats on the pregnancy.
2006-11-01 04:46:05 · answer #6 · answered by The Nana of Nana's 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With a demanding job a wife 3 children & one one the way...it may be that he is over stressed!! Stress can take your sex drive & desire away! Im sure he still very much attracted too you, but in most relationships, me speaking from eperience, sometime a relationship falls into a "comfortable" slump. Things become routine & pleasures such as sex with the one you love are put on a very far away back burner!!
2006-11-01 04:49:14 · answer #7 · answered by BooSha 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It could be many things. He might just know you don't want it so he doesn't try. It could be he is stressed or tired. It could be that because the two of you don't see each other much he doesn't get turned on as much. he could be taking care of it himself (if you know what I mean) And I hate to say it and I'm sorry for saying it but he could be cheating. Try talking to him about it. Tell him you are concerned. What ever the problem is I hope it works out and good luck.
2006-11-01 04:44:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes you have to force the issue. In the past where I used to be the "agressor" in the relationship, she has taken it upon herself take that role of the initiator. Many times I come home and being worn out don't feel like doing much except going to sleep.
An added distraction are the kids. Have to get them settled before any intimate moments can occur.
2006-11-01 04:44:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
women were given the gift of intuition, if you feel he's cheating he probably is. The line it's your imagination is what someone hiding something uses. The not wanting sex is a big red flag. Does he hide the phone and or cell bills? Are you receiving hang up when answering the phone?Has he said I just need my space? The signs of a cheating husband are there if your ready to see them.
2006-11-02 01:10:23 · answer #10 · answered by dettie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋