i am in love with a married woman, i am married as well and we dont love the once we are living with, but we both have children from our mariage and we can not get married because we are alredy married!we are so in love, we see eachother every day we are very close friends its been one year now since our great love her husband and my wife dont know any thing about it and we will keep it like this ..am not sure if i can ask her to sleep with me cause am afraid of her reaction but i would love to sleep with her when should i ask her to ?and if i dont will our love still like this without sex, forever? and if we do it will she hate me for that? i dont know what to do ,some times i hoppe that we didnt meet because we dont have future togather but i know and she knows that we cannot live without eachother we are so deep into eachother and we are so in love ,what can i do?
2006-11-01 04:20:14 · 33 answers · asked by choice 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
How would you feel if your wife wrote this? Either commit to your wife and family or leave them. You can't have it both ways. You will resent your wife for something that she knows nothing about. Honor your marriage vows would be my advice.
2006-11-01 04:35:52 · answer #1 · answered by Bev 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really need to figure out what happened in your marriage that you strayed. If there is any way to fix your marriage and end the potential affair, you should try it. It sounds like your new relationship has just been a very close friendship so far. Your close friend should do the same analysis in her home.
If you do not love your wife and cannot fix that relationship, there is no reason to stay married. You may think you are doing so for your children, but they are just as hurt by your not loving your wife as they would be by your divorce. They see your relationship with your wife as how marriage is and they know that you are not happy. Never believe that you are fooling your children, because they know a lot more than you think they do.
If you and this other woman have real and true feelings for each other than it will work out. Even if it does not work out, you are better off if you resolve your marriage issues one way or the other. Marriage is not a prison and if you are not happy, there is a good chance that your wife is not happy. She has to have some idea of your feelings no matter how secretive you think you are.
Face your issues before you make any attempt to consumate a new relationship. You, your wife, your children and your friend, her husband and her children will all be much happier for it. Do not forget that you betraying all of the people in the last sentence if you have an affair.
Take care,
Troy
2006-11-01 04:44:00 · answer #2 · answered by tiuliucci 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not happy.Chances are wife is not happy either.Do what you gotta do.Get perspective as to what you know you truly want and hopefully move on without hurting anyone. Same for the girl and your wife. Step up and take a stand. Everyone would be better off. Better being a scared kid on the inside and owning up to how you feel than being a raging bull on the outside because you are not happy. Believe me is what everyone else sees including the kids. Noone wants to feel like a beast of burden. Not a nice view.
2006-11-01 04:39:05 · answer #3 · answered by bountyhunter101 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you know the difference between infatuation and love? You may want to consider that. It's just easier to be with someone that you have no responsibilities with, nothing to discuss related to the house, bills, etc. You seem to have a lot of growing up to do....and if you proceed with your plans to have sex with your mistress you will not be able to add strength to your marriage. You made a committment that you are not living up to. You have the chance to make things right at this point. But, remember you will not be able to unring the bell if you go further. I feel sorry for your respective spouses. I also wonder why you think you're so in love with this person....you may be surprised to find that she has no intentions of taking this relationship further--may want to talk about that.
2006-11-01 04:27:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are living a totally and complete lie. What did your wife ever do to have her husband cheat on her? Look at all the lives you are ruining just to gratify yourself. Do your wife a favor and divorce her. Don't give me that I can't because we have children crap. Were you thinking about your children when you decided that you would start a relationship with someone else? Hope this helps you in your decision to actually start a sexual relationship with someone other than your spouse.
2006-11-01 04:53:53 · answer #5 · answered by Simply Lovely 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You definatley DO NOT need to be in a marriage where you no longer love your wife. I suggest you and your wife seperate because it is never good to be in a relationship you don't need to be in just drowning your sorrows, it's not fair to you and definatley not fair to your wife. If you are in love with someone else you must be miserable in the relationship, and in that stance, i'm sure your wife is also miserable, just because she hasn't mentioned anything about knowing, i'm sure she senses something wrong because now that you are in love with another woman, you can no longer love her and she can see differences in your actions in turn making her miserable also. So for both of your happiness and well being, end the relationship with your wife. Just try to talk to you wife in a calm way and explain the best as possible. Good luck.
2006-11-01 05:08:11 · answer #6 · answered by It's MIRANDA!!!! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think the question you should be asking is" will i lose my wife, and children if they find out?" if you both our unhappy with your current spouses, and you cant live without each other, get divorced. your probably like what about the children? well, do you want them living in an enviorment where mom and dad dont love each other, and dad has a mistress? think about that! i hope you do the right thing, which would have been not getting yourself in this situation in the first place!
2006-11-01 04:25:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
U BETTER NOT CHEAT ur wife u have children she also have child..think about them..if u want to get divorced is the best way for u two..but the rest ur wife her husband and children would have a bad future caused of that...reallythink about i...try to forget her...u have ur wife? why u marry her? coz u love her? or other thing? then if u marry that woman will not cheating again and fallin love with other women?
2006-11-01 04:24:53 · answer #8 · answered by ^Daphne^ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I stopped reading after the first sentence. You are married AND she is married...One would be enough. Your answer is no you won't lose her, because she is not yours to lose. You have a wife, worry about her. What is wrong with you!?!?! I don't understand what goes through peoples heads that do this crap. You made a commitment AND you have kids. Stop being a dumb *** and grow up.
2006-11-01 04:24:48 · answer #9 · answered by TripleTattoo™ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are that in love with this woman than you need to be with her. It is not fair to your wife or your children to be unhappy in your marriage, and in love with someone else.
If you are not willing to leave your wife and she won't leave her husband, than you have NO future together, and you need to end it. If you sleep with her it will only make your feelings for her stronger, and then you will find yourself in an even bigger mess!
2006-11-01 04:24:44 · answer #10 · answered by Kailey 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋