What things do we need to consider if we want to call our daughter by her middle name?

Question

We want to name her Raine. It sounds better as a middle name. But I don't want her to go through the hassel of telling her teachers every year that she goes by Raine. And legal documents will always have her first name. Seems to confusing. What do you think?

We can't come up with a name that sounds good after Raine.

And we don't have to "change" it. She's not born yet!!

Answer 1

My oldest son was given the name of an older family member, but I have a cousin who shares a first name with him. It was decided early on that he would be called by his middle name. It wasn't a problem with many people until he started school. (As for legal documents, I always tried to make sure that anything official included both his first and middle names.)

It wasn't a huge hassle telling teachers every year that he was generally called by his middle name. When he was in elementary school, he really only had one teacher per day (except for phys. ed.), so I only had to tell one person! By the time he was old enough to have more than one teacher, he had accepted that he would be called by his first name in school. I think it served to give him more of a seperation between being in school and being out of school. It was like when he would be called by his first name, it was time to buckle down and get to work.

Some teachers went along with calling him by his middle name. Most, however, understandably, didn't. Teachers have a ton of things that they need to do and remember to get though the day. My husband (high school teacher) has 120 students a day! That's alot of first names to remember, let alone remembering who wants to be called what and when. You're might have to try not to be concerned if your child is called by her first name while in school.

My son's friends call him by his first name, now. I have no problem with that, at all. He's old enough now (19) to decide what he wants to be called. You should be prepared (if you choose to go this route) to have the child mostly called by her first name when having anything to do with school. The name the teacher will call her will probably be the one to stick unless she says something to the other kids. The family still calls him by his middle name.

Good luck.

Answer 2

Remember you asked.

I think you are being really silly. Name her Raine. A middle name is not required.

Raine Jillian
Raine Marie
Raine Rose
Raine Susanna
Raine Jean
Raine Diane
Raine Diana
Raine Bethany
Raine Elizabeth
Raine Anne
Raine Faith
Raine Faye
Raine Lynn
Raine Christine

You could also just give her an initial, but then people will ask her all her life what the initial stands for...

Answer 3

My eldest daughter goes by her middle name. The only legal paper than includes her first name is the birth certificate. Even her social security number is under her middle name only. And there's never been a hassle at school as she was not the only one who went by the middle name. Also, on her papers when you sign her up for school sign your the name such as this "(Marie) Raine". This way Marie is still known as the first name, but Raine will be known as the name she will go by. That's what I did, and it's never been a problem in the 15 years since my daughter was born. I also have multiple cousins that did the same thing and never had a problem either.

Answer 4

You could consider Raine as a first name with just an initial (Raine M.--maybe not)
You could use as a first name, second name--not to go with it be a complete opposite (like Raine Elizabeth) A longer name.
You could even use an initial for first position with Raine as middle name (E. Raine)
I had a middle name that was used at home and my first name was used a school. Caused me some difficulty but I lived. In fact it is still causing difficulty but you live with it. If someone was to call me by my first name, I would not answer, because I am not that person.
Good luck in your decision

Answer 5

I don't think you should be writing a letter to her at all. Doing this will only make the situation worse really. If by writing a letter, it is cathartic to you then by all means go ahead and do it but do NOT give it to her. You'll be doing more harm than good. 1. Her cousin just came back from Iraq and surprised the family, so she did not know ahead of time. It's a little selfish on your part to fault her for wanting to go see him during this time. It's a huge deal. I know because my husband was deployed twice. To belittle the fact that he just came back from a war zone and she wants to go see him is showing your true colors. 2. You seem to like beating a dead horse. You've complained about this before and it's been an on-going issue. I personally think that you should just drop it. You are trying way too hard and it's actually making the situation worse. She clearly does not want that kind of a relationship with you at this point, so I would leave it at that. You've tried and for you to try to force the issue will only cause a bigger rift between you and her and maybe even your son.

Answer 6

I have gone by my middle name all of my life. Teachers generally pick up on it after the first few days of class. Not really a big deal. As an adult dealing with legaI documents I have all three names on them all, as well my signature is either all three names or first initial, middle name, last name. It hasn't hindered me at all. And even comes in handy...when I pick up the phone without checking caller ID and they ask for my first name, I generally know it is someone I don't want to talk to.
It hasn't been at all debilitating in my 35 years of life...go ahead do it.
I have never once wanted to change and go by my first name, I think it would be awkward especialy with all the friends I have had for so long.

I agree with old woman below I will not answer to my first name unless I am in court or on a job interview and then it is no big deal to ask to be called b my middle name.

Answer 7

Just call her by her middle name. When she learns her names in school, just tell her that these are her names but she's called by her middle name.

Or just use the first name's initial like J. Raine Smith. And call her J.Raine or both names or whatever.

People do it all the time.'

Answer 8

Raine is a lovely name! In my opinion, that is what you should use as a first name, coupled with eith another same lenghth sounding first name-like Raine Claire OR
one of your Grandmothers maiden names-like Raine Walker ,so: Raine Whatever Lastname to add a bit of family history. I like Raine Catherine also! I like Raine!
Much joy on your new adventure!

Answer 9

What about Raine Elle ? Or Raine Aynne? A middle name would sound good if it is a one-syllable. I like the name Raine, it is different (but factor in I live in the land of Billy-Bobs and Debra Sues) hehe

Answer 10

Why don't you think of just naming her Raine, with no middle name. My sister-in-law's name is just Rosemary.....no middle name, no confusion. We don't HAVE to have a middle name. It's a personal choice. Some of my brother-in-laws go by their middle names, and it only causes a confusion when legal papers are involved. My father-in-law had this thing with naming most of his boys John (only with a different middle name). He must have liked his name very much LOL