Should I be able to masturbate?

Question

Me and my husband are both young, I am 18, he is 26. And every 3 days I ask him if he wants to make love, and he turns me down every time, or acts like its a chore... and it hurts like hell

He won't allow me to masturbate, but sometimes I secretly try to because I feel like he isn't being fair, and I deserve it.. but when I try, I can't get in the mood because I start feeling guilty... and I have also been having dreams about having sex with other guys, ... ugh

Answer 1

Just do it....Your husband is one of the maucho guys that wants to be the pursuer and is turned off by the female that is the aggressor in the equation of marital bliss.

If I were you----I would do the tease thing---the sexy lingerie flaunt it in his face routine and then give him the turn down treatment when he WANTS what he WANTS!----- Let him see how it feels to be rejected for advancements.

You should really communicate what you want in your marriage relationship----Open up to your spouse and tell him of your sexual frustrations---"IT LIKE HELLO---MCFLY are you home"

Pleasuring yourself is healthy don't feel guilty about it....It's a great stress release ----Maybe you should watch an X rated movie when he's not home and just get the feel of yourself. Sometimes those kinds of movies are necessary to stimulate the brain!

Answer 2

Sounds like a no win situation there. He won;t fulfill his duties as the male of the partnership and neither will he allow you your little pleasures. Thus th ehoneymoon is over and the partnership is on it's way to dissolution. Yea, I know that sounds pretty harsh but if the shoe fits ...

First off, the two of you need some sex ed or counselling to improve the activity level in bed or whereever you choose to make wild passionate love. In fact, I would suggest you go for it as an appetizer before supper instead of waiting until bed time. Or how about sneaking in a little mutual pleasure during commercials in the evening tv viewing. Oh, and why not go at it like a pair of horny teens when doing laundry; after all, you won't get the dirty linens any dirtier will you.

In other words remove the let's have sex at bedtime routine and replace it with being totally spontaneous and wild anywhere at any time. And if that doesn't turn his crank and he won;t let you masturbate then my best advice is to trade him in for a working model.

One other comment. If his sex methods are causing you pain, then it isn't being done well. You both need to practice positions and techniques to find the 20 or so that work well and then forget the ones that hurt.

Answer 3

There is a saying, "99% of people enjoy masturbation, and 1% lie about it", lol. You should try to be part of the 99%. See a bold movie or get an online friend to help with discussion or fantasy if needed.

As for hubby...there is a problem there...at least one or two. Why does he not want sex with his young wife? Why does he need to be in control when you all have sex?

If you 2 cannot straighten this out then I'm afraid the future does not look too bright...sorry. Maybe you just need to tell him to get his stuff together. Good luck.

Answer 4

Dear:
You are soo young and then married to such an older guy! Anyways its your choice so I will answer your question since I am a woman too!
I would not advise you to chaet becoz cheating is wrong, but if he is cheating on you then you should too!
Donot tell him you are masturbating just do it when he is not around and for starters you use your fingers,then you can move on to vibrators!
Not to feel so guilty about it just picture you and him togther in your wildest fanatasy and console yourself that you are better off masturbating than cheating!
Just pleasure yourself or you may go crazy, you deserve a life of love and sex!Be happy!Goodluck
Love SANAM

Answer 5

You should not be feel guilty about you masturbating. If you will do it with someone else you endeed are guilty. Maybe he needs a longer pause between love sessions. If he is not giving to you a session of that, you can ask him about one of the touches, even that is not enough for you you could do this yourself and do not afraid as you cheat on him, because making this you don't.

Answer 6

If he cant perform after such a short time married then what does your future fulfillment hold in stock for you "NOT TO MUCH"
Ide say ,
So you pleasure yourself as you see fit after all it is self gratification and there is no reason to feel guilty . put you foot down tell him if he has a problem watching you arouse your self then take a short walk and think about why he is not getting any enjoyment out of your pleasure .God there is nothing hotter than a girl bringing herself to orgasm . After all some one has to do his chores Wink wink >;O)

Answer 7

something is definitely wrong in your and his life. masturbation is common with married people of both sexes. when one partner is excited and the other Understand,t it,s the only recourse without adultery. try to reason with him and try to understand why he feels this way.i,m a man and my wife does this openly and unashamed i encourage this activity because my age is creeping up on me and i will admit i,m not the man i once was anyone and i suspect everyone has dreams of a different sex partner.i think this is perfectly normal. NOW don,t go and beat yourself up no pun intended

Answer 8

Not going to be bad it you don't tug on it. You might even have a wet dream while you are sleeping. When you are taking a shower you can tug on it in there and come in the shower and it will all go down the drain and nobody will know the difference. Other wise you will have to find a private place where you and your g/f can "play" with each other.

Answer 9

It's better to masturbate than to have an affair; and you have needs that should be met, so yes: you should be able to masterbate. But I hope you will also find a way to openly discuss this with your husband, because the way he treats you can be destructive of the relationship.

Answer 10

How is he stopping you from self gratification? Just go in the bathroom and get it done. If he wont put out thats his problem. The fact is for a healthy marriage you both should put out whenever the other one wants it even if you dont feel like it.