My husband has a really low poor sexual appetite, and he thinks mine is too high (if you call every three days high). When he refuses me and doesn' t feel like it, I start having real dreams about having sex with other guys.... ugh, and I hate it......and trust me, I've talked to him.
2006-10-31 22:31:31 · 16 answers · asked by Pook 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Its really not your fault and your sex drive is very normal. Even if its high, afterall you're doing it with your husband so let anyone say whatever, its not their business. Dreaming is a bit harmless but remember, it can turn into an obsession and then into action so you have to be careful.
Are you an housewife? If yes, why don't you get a job so that way, you would have your mind occupied. Then, was your husband like this before you married him? If no, then there's something wrong somewhere. Maybe he's really stressed as that could cause him to have a low libido.
Still talk to him explaining the reason why a husband and wife should enjoy their sex lives in all totality as that is one of the reasons God created sex btw a married couple. Tell him that you love him and would want him and only him and not have any extra marital affair only if he fulfils his duty.
Try also to make it spontaneous and not a routine thing where he's likely to turn you down. When he's bathing join him, as he sleeps give him a bj, romance him, light perfume candles, play soft music and seduce him.
However, take it one step at a time and i assure you that he would oblige. But if he loves you, he will do this.
2006-10-31 22:50:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even without blaming your husband you could have expressed your thoughts..
This is quite natural to think about something new... We love to have different dish sometime, the same way many people do dream about others...
If you really remains dissatisfied then find some like-minded person and fulfill it or enjoy but in that case you will need to rememer two things (1) be prepared for the social consequences (2) in future if you come to know that you husband has also had some affair with some other gal then dont blame him;
If this is acceptable to you then go for it...
2006-10-31 22:51:55 · answer #2 · answered by CosmicLight 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't agree with the comments that you must be a nympho. Dreams just tell us what we're already thinking about, they're sort of a mirror on your soul, and it's clear to me that you are not just missing sex but also missing attention and the feeling of being special to someone. In short, your dreams seem to say that you're not just sexually neglected but emotionally neglected as well. Is that true? Just remember, that dreams by themselves are not bad, and just because you dream of sex with other guys doesn't mean that you are going to actually do it., so don't feel guilty about the dreams. Perhaps the age gap is too big.
2006-10-31 23:14:58 · answer #3 · answered by AnOrdinaryGuy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey:
Well it happens to almost every sexually active people even if they are satisfied in their relationship! Its natural dear and we cannot control our dreams!!But if you feel so strongly about your dreams I suggest you train your mind by doing yoga and meditation!
As for your hubby, I have never heard of any man who doesnot want to have sex at least once a day!You should help him and donot take anyone advice and cheat on him becuse it is very easily to break a home but hard to build one!
Because you feel guilty about these feelings , it means that you are A yoga and loving wife and you should take your hubby to see a doctor and some counselling!There are hormones that can bring back his sex drive!
Remember that a marriage is a compromise and based on the bond of trust and fidelity so help your man help himself!
Goodluck and hope you are happy!
Love SANAM
2006-10-31 23:09:38 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem honey. I have talked and talked and talked till I turn blue in the face, but here lately have just been having dreams that I am having sex with someone else, most often someone famous rather than someone I know or he knows. I really don't know what to tell you to do, except to enjoy the dreams and let them be your little "secret". It's not like you are actually cheating, and it's not like you actually want to cheat, it just means you want sex and therefore you dream of what you want. Good luck!
2006-10-31 22:50:50 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have needs too an dif he isnt willing or cant give any help to ya then you will have a desire event hough you try to respecthis wihes and that desire is uninhibited in your sleep and dreams so if he can tgive it to ya and you have the need which is a normal need maybe its time to start looing elswehere but of clurse it would be best to leave first. He may love you but in a differnt way. and that way may not be dondusive for marrige any more or rather never has but you have to admit it and realize he may not be a bad guy but that is not what this is about it si about compatability. Can you live without sex and if so for whow long and if not how can you handle it so that you also have your needs met.
2006-10-31 22:37:53 · answer #6 · answered by Bud 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't worry this is normal dreaming about others. Maybe you and your husband should seek some medical avice about his sex drive. There are people out there that can help him. But does he want to be helped?
2006-10-31 22:34:59 · answer #7 · answered by rach 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think most women do, so your not alone on this one. Rather u dream of other guys than actually go out there and look for it somewhere else.
2006-10-31 22:36:01 · answer #8 · answered by kittymeow63 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Spirita explains your dreams
Visit http://spirita.blogspot.com/ and post your question as a comment. You'll get your free dream interpretation (as a comment, too) shortly
2006-11-01 01:50:51 · answer #9 · answered by Spirita 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
our dreams are mostly influenced by our thoughts
2006-10-31 22:35:03 · answer #10 · answered by ntu 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋