Most TV shows - especially soaps - portray men as eager to be around and in there when their pregnant wife gives birth. But I think this is largely down to the vested feminine pressure and social PC - "political correctness" - and that most men would rather not. Frankly, I also suspect that many women deeply resent being the ones who have to give birth - (which, let's face it, is a hugely ugly as well as a painful process) - and feel that men should share in their suffering as much as possible (under the name of "caring.")
Birth is natural, true - but then, so is crapping. And I wonder - if women were the only ones who needed to go to the toilet - would they insist on men being there along with them, just to endure the pain and the poo too...
2006-10-31 20:31:27 · 27 answers · asked by TruthHurts 3 in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
It's a miracle...? Well, yes - I suppose it is... The whole natural world's a miracle - like manure that turns into nourishment for a seed that turns into a cabbage that turns into food for a caterpillar that turns into a butterfly.
2006-10-31 20:59:13 · update #1
Best moments of my life was being their at the birth of my children
2006-10-31 20:37:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
My hubby had no choice but to be there during both of my children's births but he knew he had to be there FOR ME. He cut the cord and got to hold them, and even cried both times!
Now, the after effects, even still years later, are a different story. Let's just say, he doesn't look at me the same way (down there) as he used to... lol
I think child birth makes women stronger as a person. Yes, guys may be able to handle certain pain thresholds better, but I personally don't feel guys could handle child birth if it were possible. A woman is more in tune with her body than a man is. A woman can feel this tiny little child inside and be able to bond with it before it's even born, unlike a guy who would probably assume that little "kick" was gas. I mean, look at the act of an orgasm. A woman can feel much more intense feelings than a man. The whole body can experience an orgasm, not just that one part. Unlike a man who gets "there" and that's it.
I may not be a guy, and I can't claim to know the exactness of how a man's body works. And of course, not all women are the same, and not all men are the same.
2006-11-01 10:06:03 · answer #2 · answered by Sweets 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well, it's not a poo that's popping out, is it? It's YOUR child!
My husband didn't want to be at the birth and I was quite okay with that. My former husband had threatened to slap my face when I gave birth to my son - I had a natural childbirth and the agony was exquisite - and he didn't like my groans of pain. (He is my ex,)
Anyway, I decided I would be better off but complications set in and they wanted my husband with me. So my husband was around, although not actually there in the room for both the births of my two daughters. Second one he'd planned to be there, but I had an emergency caesarean.
I did't think much about it until we decided not to have any more children and he volunteered to be sterilised. I was quite surprised, my husband is particularly shy and I didn't think he would go through with the procedure. I asked why and he said: "After seeing what you went through to have the girls, there's no way I could expectyou to go through anything else. If you can do it, I can too." It made me fall in love with him all over again.
So giving birth isn't about you. It's about your baby and it's entrance into the world. And it's about your wife and what she has to suffer to produce your baby.
So grow up. Your wife needs help and support, not an immataure teenager that whimps out because "he can't cope". I didn't want to be there either. Do you think it was a barrel of laughs? If your wife wants you there, be there. If she doesn't, be grateful. But it's not about you!
Sorry if I sound cross, but I am!
2006-11-01 05:04:06 · answer #3 · answered by True Blue Brit 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Lots of men put up some convincing 'front' about not caring or about avoiding inconvenient or unpleasant stuff.
In truth, though, guys have as many emotions as women do, and they're desperate not to miss out on them.
There is a large element of guilt in the guy's wish to be there while the woman he 'knocked up' is suffering for the cause. He wants to share a little of the pain, and let her know that he cares about her. (Toothmarks on his arm are a small price to pay)
Jealousy features as well:childbirth ISN'T like 'going to the toilet' ; It's a challenging and damaging ordeal a bit like the tribal initiation ceremonies that many men glamourise in their imagination (and a bit like the homoerotic ordeal that the tough-guy hero goes through in action movies). Every mother gets the chance to 'prove her virility', but a guy has to organise pointless artificial adventures like climbing dangerous mountains or cycling to work, if he wants to show the world how bulletproof he is.
More importantly, the idea that you've made this immense change happen in somebody else's body is very rewarding to the inner megalomaniac. Because you did it just by having some sex, it feels erotic, too ("Wow! look what my dick did!"). And because the result is going to be a whole new person, who could end up also having children and kind of making a part of yourself last, like, FOREVER, that's something that any guy will be curious about.
(not to mention, a little sceptical, too. Maybe he's not really going to believe it until he's seen it for himself!)
Having a child is probably the most life-changing thing that any guy can do. If he isn't there, he can laugh it off as unimportant; a lot of men have done exactly that, and ended up feeling that they missed out.
If it's so important, then of course he wants to be there. He also wants the statistics published in the national press; he wants good camera angles for the action replay & ref's-eye view, and he wants a bloody medal ! (toothmarks on his arm will do)
2006-11-01 05:50:35 · answer #4 · answered by Fitology 7 · 3⤊ 2⤋
birth isn't a miracle, a miracle would imply something more than nature was involved or it was something completely out of the ordinary. i've been at a birth (not my child) and it really freaked me the fu.ck out. i held her hand but i kept straring at the floor. i wasn't expected at that stuff to come out.
and SwtAngel, your views are quite offensive. the only reason women feel a more intense orgasm is because the have more nerves on the clitoris and they can have multiple orgasms, and i'm sure a guy would know it was a baby and not just gas.
2006-11-02 03:25:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am due to be at the birth of my first child in a few weeks. We have been attending antenatal classes where the midwife talks endlessly about the paid that my wife will have to endure. I feel like I will be a spare part at the birth but everyone says not to miss it so there is peer pressure to be there. To tell the truth, I am cr@pping it. I will just be stood at the non-business end mopping a brow and saying "breathe" but I will never be able to help nor comprehend the paid that my beloved wife is going through. I'll be as much use as a chocolate teapot. I hope it is worth it.
2006-11-01 09:21:48 · answer #6 · answered by myownprivateroad 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
My wife had a C Section and I was so close the doctor started explaining every thing she was doing. I loved it. The doctor thought I was a pain in the butt I'm sure. The truth be known though after serving in the Military, working with a Sheriffs Dept. and now a supervisor at a 911 center I had never seen anything that made me to sick to my stomach to continue with my job. Till I saw a normal childbirth. I turned green. I can watch C Sections and operations all day, pulled bloody people out of cars and seen people die, but if my wife ever has child normal childbirth I am staying in the visitors area!
2006-11-01 04:39:40 · answer #7 · answered by mark g 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I was there for the entire duration of my son's birth.
Mostly because I wanted to be there, but also because my wife was scared witless of the whole process, which got about 100 times worse when the hospital staff decided she needed an emegency c-section. I was in the operating theatre for that too.
Giving birth is a difficult time, and a woman will need someone with her upon who she can rely. Someone she can get comfort from, someone to help her through. So who better than hubby?
2006-11-01 04:37:59 · answer #8 · answered by mark 7 · 4⤊ 1⤋
The best day of my life was watching the birth of my daughter. It surprised me as although I said I would be there at her birth I '' don't want to watch the mucky end'' ........ however when it all started I had to watch and so far as I could, be part of the whole experience............ it was wonderful. The midwife and nurses did make me feel as I was not wanted though, kind of ''we don't want a man around, this is for women only''
2006-11-01 04:52:06 · answer #9 · answered by Robert B 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
when my son was born it was the first time i saw my husband cry [ macho man] ok he was a bumbling oaf in the delivery room in and out, one *** after the other but im sure he would tell you he would not have missed it for the world, and i found out he was not made of stone, the next time he was even better and put a wet cloth on my forehead . us women do not resent giving birth the whole point is that men could not cope with pain that intense .
2006-11-01 06:29:57 · answer #10 · answered by rachel m 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Actually I really don't think that most of the men want to be around the birth, but would prefer to see the nicely washed cleaned baby and wife any the blessed event. But they are forced to because of today PC as you say. I certainly did NOT want my husband around when I had our children.
2006-11-01 04:36:35 · answer #11 · answered by London Girl 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋