He is a university professor and I was a student of his six years ago. He has a terrible marriage and I was always the friend who'd listen to him and share his pain, I never intended to take it any further, but he did. Nothing physical is going on, but I just feel so guilty knowing that he talks and sees me without the knowledge of his wife. He keeps on showing his affection to me and I keep on denying it. I know that I love him, but I can't go on with this relationship neither can I end it. He's a great person who tried hard to save that marriage and is still struggling. On the other hand, I can't stop thinking about him. I do care about him, and I know he cares a great deal about me. I didn't date anybody for the past six years, simply because he wouldn't accept it out of jealousy and I couldn't do it out of love for him. I'm in pain; guilt is eating me up. I recently met his wife while at his office, where he appointed me as a professor assistant, I couldn't look her in the eye...
2006-10-31 12:12:50 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Alright I have got to be honest with you!! Everyone is telling you not to put yourself in this position. But it sounds like you have been putting yourself in this position for the past six years! He obviously hasn't left his wife over this time, what makes you think he is ever going to leave her???
And, what about his poor wife! I don't care how bad the relationship is, unless he is willing to call it off, think about how she would feel if she found out? Or how you would feel if you were married to someone and you found out they were cheating??
This situation is good or healthy for anyone in it. And he is not leaving his wife. If he was going to, he already would have! Get out of it, find yourself someone willing to give you the love and attention you deserve!!!
2006-10-31 12:37:47 · answer #1 · answered by Sandy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What you need ot understand is that you may be getting only one side of this story. Have you witnessed any of these problems? Or is it just hear say form him? His wife may not even realize there are any problems. Especially if it has been going on for six years. I know if I knew about a relationship that had been going on for even six DAYS, you, him and the whole world would know about it. Have you even thought about the prospect that he's wanting his cake and eating it too. He may have problems in his marriage but his relationship with you is not his answer. He needs to move on and get a divorce or you need to let go until he decides waht he really wants.
2006-10-31 22:29:20 · answer #2 · answered by Derinda P 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are answering your own question.GUILT, This is a great step getting in over your head. If he was going to leave his wife he would have already done it. He wants his cake and to eat it to. WALK AWAY! You will find someone else, just think if he dose this to his wife he will all most defiantly do it to you, if you ever get him. This is a sin not just for him but if you go along with it you are also sinning. The Lord will help you through this if you will ask him......
2006-10-31 20:25:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are for sure in love with him, you say you are...... If you really do love him then help him to keep his vows to his wife and to his family.
When you love someone you want them to be the best they can be. Real loves motivates one to be the best they can be.
I dont know that this is real love becuase it goes against those things. Unless, you make that choice.
Choose the right- you will be blessed one day for making the right choice and respecting his family. You will always shine in his eyes for doing the right thing. And you can live with yourself and hold your head high.
Good luck- You can do this. Choose the right.
2006-10-31 21:27:23 · answer #4 · answered by SunValleyLife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless he's signed divorce papers, he's married and off-limits. Especially if either one is trying to repair the marraige, outside interferrences are the worst thing for the situation.
2006-10-31 20:18:07 · answer #5 · answered by Clover 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should get away from the situation you are in. He is still with his wife, right? Don't be fooled.
2006-10-31 20:18:24 · answer #6 · answered by jammer 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
His marriage is on the rocks. Get yours. Bang his brains out.
2006-10-31 20:37:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You have to just tell him: pick one, me or your wife. End of story.
2006-10-31 20:21:03 · answer #8 · answered by Ariella 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Please!!! Don't put yourself thur this situation. Get out. You need to be there for yourself.
2006-10-31 20:26:11 · answer #9 · answered by rexy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋