for u who answered do u wanna rate my poem?? or if u didnt rate my poem!?

Question

The calm wind blows throughout the trees
Only through the teasing clouds can i see
A day like this brings a hopeful view
That maybe things will get better without you
Gloomy days have passed
But this night makes me not miss the last
Bitterness overcomes me
In a way that no one can believe
Relaxing winds and silence help me to make it through
I forget that I had ever loved you
Why were those times so real and sincere
When in the end they came to disappear
Some days are better than the rest
But others can be so far from the best
The soothing winds come to pass
But fade despairingly way too fast
Obnoxious times I begin to miss
I say "forget it, this is hopeless".

plz know that im not incredibly sad or anything like that im not saying i havent been but im not anymore so dont worry about how i feel concentrate on the words.

Answer 1

I think you are very clever and you have a talent there. May I say that I found some lines difficult to read eg. ...'makes me not miss the last' - might be better as 'makes me want the past'. Overall I rate your poem as 8 out of 10. More please - and be happy.

Answer 2

the poem is okay. you can tell its written by some teenager who misses some guy. real poetry isnt always rhyming..you just write what comes to your heart. try to use words that dont say exactly what you mean. metaphors and longer descriptions. hope this helps.

Answer 3

It's good enough if it's yours. But isn't there another catagory for poems and things of the sort.

Answer 4

Good, you should be a poet and put that on OurEcho or FictionPress.

Answer 5

I think a 10..
beautiful feeling, keep it up.. :)

Answer 6

I love it
you should make it a song

Answer 7

You are losing your meter. Clean it up.

Answer 8

that is so awesome!! its better than mine!!! it makes you actually feel it!