okay I had a problem in middle school and people still remeber what happend and hate me and talk about me. I want to talk to them again I dont want to be a loner.(everthing that happened were not true a gril that hated me so much started a rumor and everyone followed.)they also but people agianst me too. HELP PLEASE NEED GOOD TIPS
2006-10-31 11:30:42 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Ignore them and be the new person you want to be
2006-10-31 11:32:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can only imagine how upsetting this must be. My sister had the same thing happen to her in middle school. It got ugly. People can be very cruel and uncaring.
But there are some important tools for this type of thing. It does NOT matter what it is that may have caused this delima, but the important thing is to get complete with this. Claim responsibilty about the problem you had in middle school. You could find a way to talk to this person, being completely alligned with yourself and say something like this: "I really regret what I have done, and feel like I've learned a great deal from it. I'd really like to work this out so there can no longer be that animosity. We all make mistakes, and I'm willing to work things out. Is there anyway we could put the past behind us so that we can move on?"
It doesn't have to be those words. But the point is that YOU show that you have made a mistake, admit it, and asking for truths. Be totally authentic...humble with yourself. But don't apologize for girl's behavior. They are responsible for their actions, just that you are responsible for your own as well. If for some reason these people continue to harrass you, then at least YOU got complete with it. You cannot guarantee they have. It's their choice to. But you can move on. You may consider a transfer to a different school or maybe looking into getting a GED. But that should only be a last alternative. I say all this to you because my sister really had it bad. She was fortunate that we moved to a different state when Dad got a job transfer. After that, her social life started all over, clean slate. I don't know how it would have been for her if she continuted into high school with those girls. Nobody should be terrorized. There's just no excuse. Take good care of yourself.
2006-10-31 19:59:52 · answer #2 · answered by sweeta : 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm afraid that's a problem you'll just have to live with. You can say things like: It takes one to know one! then ignore them to the best of your ability.. I have almost same problem and I'm 56! Maybe You can show them up and become a Doctor or Nurse or something. Maybe a Politician! I'm a Locksmith and a Herbalist too! I'm currently studying on line about being an electrician! Maybe these are things that might interest you! When you're studying something your interested in you won't
worry about others as much!
2006-10-31 19:47:48 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My school there is this teacher that talks about manner, Gossip and rumors and all types of stuffs and she said to talk with the people who started the rumor first. So if it was a lie that she made, go ahead and say stuffs like..."I did not do ____________". And that will make the whole school realize that wasn't true.
2006-10-31 19:41:49 · answer #4 · answered by ellica415 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My boyfriend has a bad reputation in our city and what he has done is just mentions the rumors to everyone who is acting judgmentally towards him. He looks them directly in the eye and says "you know you are talking to a guy who supposedly..." This makes the person aware that he is aware, that he is not ashamed enough to hide it, that he knows if they believe it, they are choosing to believe a rumor they have no proof is true. It is a powerful way to get your power back from the people who took it away and shame others for being weak sheep.
2006-10-31 19:39:48 · answer #5 · answered by BLANK 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it would be a good time to invest your time dealing with what you can do something about and less time worrying about what people think of me. Unfortunately we live in a less than perfect world. There are going to be people that don't have our best intentions in mind so it is our own personal best interest to engage ourselves in pastimes that encourage growth. Expand your circle of friends, as these persons you write of are not even decent enough to be considered enemies. You will find that there are people out there that are less interested in what other people say about you and more interested in getting to know you on there own. Cheer up and move on.
2006-10-31 19:38:35 · answer #6 · answered by Goodie66 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why does your life revolve around what these people think? If they are telling lies and are willing to believe only the bad in you, I would not want them as friends. Fair weather friends are not friends. School is just a stepping stone...hold your head up and move forward. Good Luck
2006-10-31 19:39:11 · answer #7 · answered by lacey0258 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what is true about yourself. Ignore them. In my experience, once I got out middle school, and moved to the high school, many of the kids went to different schools, so it was a fresh start.
2006-10-31 19:36:27 · answer #8 · answered by Kimberley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just ignore them and they might forget if it wasnt that serious. If they did that to you then I think that you shouldn't me hanging out with those types of people. Good friends accept ppeople for who they are. Not just ditch them after one incident, no matter how big it is. Just make new friends! People you trust.
Always Remember- Forgiveness is a Godly trait.
2006-10-31 19:35:22 · answer #9 · answered by Psyche 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what i do, is completley ignor them, if they dont like you, dont try to win them over, it is a waste of time! i know from experience. these people start rumours to get to you, but if you dont let it, then it starts to get to them. if some 1 confronts you about a romour, laff at it, and say thats the funniest thing i have heard. when you get upset about it, those mean ppl have won what they were tryna do. hope i help. still got probs? email me i am a peer couciler: kakvol@yahoo.com
2006-10-31 19:35:09 · answer #10 · answered by Sexy-Sarah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
anybody that ever talked about me i have confronted them about it you need to stand up to these people and if you dunt they will see you as a weak person and nobody likes a weak person and they will never leave you alone i always say if people talk about you its because you have something they dont and no matter how gorgous smart or perfect you are people are always going to talk you just have to know that your better than that and not to let things bother you, also maybe people dont talk to you because maybe since this incident you have been to embarrassed to talk put yourself out there and talk to people maybe not everyone thinks bad about you
2006-10-31 19:42:11 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋