My wife told me that she was raped as a teenager. But what puzzles me is that she went back to the guy. Was this rape or was this her first time and she was not ready for the experience. Serious answers only please!
2006-10-31 07:39:28 · 12 answers · asked by aden d 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
why did your wife go back to him. did she have an affair with him after that. maybe u should have a frank discussion with her, maybe he black-mailed her into it.
if she is confessing all this to u, then she must be trust worthy. just talk to her frankly and with an open mind. and whatever it is, both of u decide to put it behind your life, for your own good. past is past and it should not interfere with the present.
i know that it is easier said than done. but in the best interest of both of u, just talk all about it, and then clear it up and then put it behind u, and it should never again crop up back into your lives otherwise it will affect your relationship. take care and God bless.
2006-10-31 07:41:59 · answer #1 · answered by angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The confusion is the idea that men have of rape and the idea that a woman has of rape. There is no way that your wife was violently raped the way that we understand rape and went back to the guy and had a regular relationship. He may have forced her to have sex with him against her will and that is what she means by rape.
She was a teen and probably wasn't mature enough to know that she was violated at that time. Looking back she can say, yes I have been raped. But at the time it probably didn't feel like a rape.
If your wife was violently raped, you'd know it.
2006-10-31 08:24:36 · answer #2 · answered by Big Marc 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marc has it right. The main thing is not to question it. She is your wife. If she wasn't ready for it.........and he preceeded than it was rape. She has had to live with that for many years. The memories of rape don't ever go away. Not ever. Be supportive if she brings it up again. LEt her know how much you love her and that you are so sorry that she had to go through that.
2006-10-31 12:41:07 · answer #3 · answered by heartwhisperer2000 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
. You really don't give enough information
She could have gone out with a guy who actually date raped her against her will then decided she liked him later. Rape is sex without consent so a husband can technically rape his wife if she says no and he forces her to have sex anyway. I think your wife could have said no to this person then resumed a relationship later. The bigger question is why is it coming up now, it must bother you..
2006-10-31 07:45:17 · answer #4 · answered by Donald P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she says she was raped then she was raped. You know the rule. If she went back for more then we will summarize that she liked what she got the first time around
2006-10-31 07:47:06 · answer #5 · answered by veerfish 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hm, nicely at the start, i hit upon it extremely admirable, you being so affected person which incorporate your spouse and not letting her sexual intercourse come between the two one in each and every of you. in my view, i think of you are able to desire to have a delightful, loving communicate on the subject of the numerous vibes each and each of you is having (you questioning you're comfortable, her asserting it incredibly is too tough), perhaps furnish some examples of alternative situations you considered to be comfortable and ask her some examples of her very own, that way each and each of you will supply the different the documents mandatory and doubtless even locate out some new issues(eg: perhaps there are issues which you do and think of that she incredibly enjoys yet rather she would not - and vice versa). Secondly, returned, very admirable of you to study on people who've suffered what she has, yet how approximately conversing to her and sharing each and everything you study? in basic terms ask her, ask her if she thinks that deep down, she thinks she ought to income some administration over the sentiments she's had after the rape. Ask her if she identifies with the persons from "regulation and Order", ask her why is she attracted to those video clips. I for one, like to be sure that my sweetheart reads approximately issues i went by way of. the belief of him being concerned a lot to invite and placed up questions, study boards, him staring on the plain shift in my habit, it makes me open up thoroughly. Him asking me questions, him being concerned, him being right here to help and not letting me to experience on my own in this. and that i've got this droop that all and sundry women persons tend to be like this, there could desire to be few exceptions. it is my advice, communicate along with her. Open up, teach all your concepts, teach her how in contact you're, how a lot you care. And on the subject of the rape, returned, ask HER what's it that she needs, perhaps she ought to describe the scenes she has in concepts, and final yet no longer least, exhibit your thoughts approximately it (" This perplexes me, as she is quite particular in our love making while expr..."). :)
2016-10-21 01:30:27 · answer #6 · answered by comesana 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was dated raped at 15 and i dated the guy ( for a a month or so) a year later....i think yoiur right we were not ready for the sexual experience but it happened and not the way we wanted it to happed.
2006-10-31 07:46:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
she could had been rape but didn't know how to handle the situation so ended up with the guy again.
2006-10-31 07:41:35 · answer #8 · answered by Taco 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think She Raped the teenager. What do you think?
2006-10-31 08:32:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't understand why would she go back to the guys...was it for revenge, or there is something that you do not know?
2006-10-31 07:46:45 · answer #10 · answered by alandicho 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋