So I was with a person for 7.5 years, 1.5 of which were supposedly married - we had a ceremony, but I later got an annulment, which technically means the marriage was null and void from the beginning. Sadly he married me for money and after the Sept. 11 market crash he filed for divorce and asked for half of the money I had inherited when my parents died - oh and yeah - he wanted me to sell my house and live on the street. Great guy huh? What can I say - I knew it all along and shouldnt have agreed to marry him, but I did because of low self esteem and thought I couldnt find anybody better. Word of advice - if you are slugging straight vodka before walking down the aisle, dont do it. So anyway, now when dating someone, what do I say, do I say Im single and never married, do I say Im divorced, do I tell them I just dated someone for 7.5 years (dated 95 - married 2000 he left 2001 annulment finalized 2003)? What do I say?
2006-10-31 07:14:58 · 19 answers · asked by theotherwoman 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't lie or leave out big chunks...what if you end up dating this new person for a long time and marrying them? Eventually you will have to tell them the whole story, right? You dont want to get caught in a lie, or worry about what you told them when you first started dating....just tell them "its complicated, i was in a long term relationship with a guy that tried to ruin my life". save the details for later...if you date this person for a while, tell them the whole true story when you feel comfortable. you dont need to disclose all the details up front, but dont lie.
2006-10-31 07:22:49 · answer #1 · answered by EllisFan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honesty is the best policy. When it comes to you ever filing for a marriage certificate, you can say "no, you weren't married". but be honest with the man in your life. Tell him it was annulled, and why. If you lie about that, and he finds out, he'll only wonder what else you may be lying about.
I've been married twice, and have a child from the first, so I understand your situation to some degree, and have to deal with similar questions and prejudicial reactions.
Best of luck with future relationships!
2006-10-31 15:19:31 · answer #2 · answered by Heath 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's tuff. Whats the trouble with stating the facts as you've put them in your question.
You were married but had the marriage annulled. You were with the person for 7+ years. It wouldn't be necessary to mention divorce. You haven't been divorced.
2006-10-31 15:24:11 · answer #3 · answered by ratdog 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell the truth, that is the best thing you could possibly do. If you tell someone of your situation and your past and they decide it's not for them. Better they find out earlier than later, cause if that's not what they want and you lie or hide it: when they find out (which they will, lies are always exposed) it still won't be what they want and you have just wasted time and energy on something very short term.
When in doubt... tell the truth.
2006-10-31 15:23:03 · answer #4 · answered by twosdaymornin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're just casually dating, you don't owe anyone an explanation...but if you get involved in a more serious relationship, just tell him you were married for a short time but had it annulled. Everyone makes mistakes
2006-10-31 15:19:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would say that you were in a long relationship. Technically, you were never married. If you start to date someone seriously, then it might be a good idea to tell them, but until then, I would just leave it at I am single.
2006-10-31 15:22:30 · answer #6 · answered by Bill 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can say you were married at one time, but it's been annulled. If they ask more questions, you can choose to answer those, or tell them you'd rather not focus on the past.
2006-10-31 15:20:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You only have to say what you feel comfortable saying. I think it would be ok if you were to say you were never married. I am glad you got an annulment, what a jerk you deserve way better than that.
2006-10-31 15:18:37 · answer #8 · answered by Rachel Bitchface 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I doubt that you really need to tell anyone all of that! Just say you were in a previous serious relationship that did not work out. If you get more serious than a date or two, tell your story if you are comfortable telling it. Otherwise, it is past history and nobody's business. Just remember...what doesn't kill us makes us stronger! Good luck.
2006-10-31 15:23:18 · answer #9 · answered by Bev 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd just say long term relationship. No point in going into details until things get serious. Then, if you love them and vice versa, lay the whole story on them.
2006-10-31 15:22:00 · answer #10 · answered by jwb674 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋