I would not be living like a nun if I never tied the knot. But I am not sure I could get along in a marriage. I am so scared! I have joined a site to meet men who want to get married and I am scared to even meet them!
2006-10-31 06:13:22 · 24 answers · asked by meanpromqueen 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Some of you misunderstand me. I am afraid to get married. I am not afraid to date.
2006-10-31 11:27:33 · update #1
I have to get married to have kids.
2006-10-31 11:29:20 · update #2
Your "terror" will diminish after time with that special someone. Nothing wrong with being afraid, my friend. Trust God as we are to do. He will lead you correctly. It is not mandatory, nor necessary in God's eyes to be married remember. Don't be so hard on yourself. Good luck to you.
2006-10-31 06:26:14 · answer #1 · answered by Lorie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to first figure out why you are so scared to get married. What aspects of it scares you? Have you ever been in a relationship before? Once you can determine what it is that is holding you back, then maybe you can move forward and think about it. Not every man that you see or talk to is going to be your pick for a husband, but you will eventually find someone and you will know it. You will have a feeling that he is the one, and then you can slowly find it out. I would not suggest using the internet to find someone. The only site that I would try, if this is what you are wanting to do, is the www.eharmony.com. This seems to be a reasonable site. Good Luck and remember to look deep inside yourself to find the problem. Get yourself some help if you need to in order to find it. This can be done by talking to friends or relatives or some form of therapy, just to find the underlying problem. You are not the only person that has this type of problem, you are not alone. Hope this helps.
2006-10-31 14:33:38 · answer #2 · answered by curious mom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is a long process, just take it day by day, you meet someone and then you might have a relationship where you can get to know him better and yourself too because you will experience things you have not before which "could" lead to a marriage, now if you don't want to get married you don't have to do it, it's your life, what's pressing you to do this?
Marriage is not a life sentence, if you don't want to stay married you don't have to but I've heard that you regret the most not the things that you did what the ones you did not. Think about it.
Good luck.
2006-10-31 14:23:23 · answer #3 · answered by Firelei P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you trying to meet men if you are terrified of getting married? You don't have to live your life like a nun. Live your life like a Christian! Read your bible where it tells you that He rather you not marry, but if you lust for sex than it is better that you marry. (something to that effect!) So calm down and stop writing to that site where you meet men. Why do you need to meet men on the Internet anyway? Go to church, bible study and different church events.
2006-10-31 14:27:44 · answer #4 · answered by Child of God 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The institution of marriage was invented for 2 reasons: It makes it not a sin to have sex, and it is a way for people with power to control where their wealth goes. The original purpose of marriage has been romanticised into something completely different in modern times, and it really doesn't have much purpose unless you plan to have kids and want to save some tax dollars. It sounds like you never got into the hype over marriage, so why worry about it?
2006-10-31 14:19:34 · answer #5 · answered by martin h 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are scared because either you've been hurt in the past or have witness others. Work on you and try to find out why you are terrified. There is a reason!
Once you can identify the reason then you can find a solution. Maybe you aren't ready for a relationship. There is nothing wrong with that.
2006-10-31 14:27:53 · answer #6 · answered by Tamika G 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be scared.
2 Timothy 1:7
7For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.
Pray and the Lord will direct you. One thing for certain that the Christian man you meet loves the Lord first, then you and then the rest of his family.
Ask for prayer in your church too. Prayer is very powerful. Join a Bible Study also...it will do you so much good and the Lord might even provide your future husband there. Involve yourself in Christian activities...don't just limit yourself on the internet.
God Bless you!
2006-10-31 14:24:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have severe emotional problem , You need to go to a neurologist and talk to them. Your 39 yrs.old and you never had a date. Have ever been ask, no you joined a site but that doesn't mean they want to marry you. I think that would be for people just to meet and talk and you really need to find a friend to go with you. You might enjoy yourself, stop being self conscious just hold head up high and they are there for the same reasons.you are. Wake up and live girl, it wouldn't hurt.
2006-10-31 14:34:29 · answer #8 · answered by Nicki 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Idealistically speaking, you may feel this way because you haven't yet met a man you feel that way about. On the other hand, that statement of mine assumes that all of us women need/want to find that man and get married and viola! our lives are complete.
Before dropping marriage off your list of things to do, I'd like to see you deal with that fear first. You don't want NOT to do something (that in itself is completely harmless........I'm NOT referring to thngs that are generally hurtful like drugs etc)because you FEAR it, right?
Wouldn't you rather CHOOSE not be be married rather than feel you have no choice due to your fear? The fear, as most fears do, usually goes deeper than we think and the deeper the fear lives, the more avenues of our lives it can be darkening.
Check that out with a bit of counseling. See what comes up. This may go deeper than marriage.
2006-10-31 14:25:38 · answer #9 · answered by miss_princess_goddess 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have deep, emotional issues that need resolve. Seek out help from friends and family. That you are 39 and terrified of marriage is ODD. Something isn't right there.
2006-10-31 14:20:51 · answer #10 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋