This girl im with says I cannot get drunk ever. Not even once or twice a year (which is as often as i get drunk) to celebrate things like my birthday and christmas. I think it is and i think im gonna leave her.
2006-10-31 05:52:22 · 45 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes, thats very controlling
2006-10-31 05:54:17 · answer #1 · answered by Molly323 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Yeah, it's a little controlling. But ask yourself why.
Maybe someone in her family is an alcoholic and she's lived with that all her life. Then again, maybe she was in an abusive relationship with someone who was always drunk and she has no interest in going through that again. This may just be her way of controlling the situation.
It's also interesting that you're complaining because she says you "cannot get drunk," not "you cannot drink." She's not asking you never to have another drink, just to not drink so much you make a complete *** of yourself, puke on your clothes, and spend the next day hung over. Why is this a problem for you? Is getting drunk and incoherent the way you "celebrate."
And for that you're going to leave her? Maybe you need to grow up a bit.
2006-10-31 05:59:49 · answer #2 · answered by wineboy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is just a deal breaker for her. For me it's smoking, if I find out my husband is smoking I would have serious issues with this. I would not leave him because I promised to love him forever, but it appears you are not married.
You have to decide what is more important, yes it is controlling, but try and take a step back and ask yourself why she feels this way, is it a moral standard for her, does she come from a long family of alcoholics? If the second is true, maybe you can make her a deal, you'll refrain from alcohol if she seeks treatment with Al-Anon, they will teach her that you can't control other people's actions.
If it's any other reason, the she might be just that way, today it's alcohol, tomorrow it's talking to other girls... you just have to decide if a relationship with her is more important than the once or twice a year you drink.
2006-10-31 06:23:51 · answer #3 · answered by Heather S 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
then leave her.
well you could ask her why she so apposed to this....did she date an abusive alcoholic? is she a recovering aloholic? if you gain some insight into why shes like this it may help you decide if you really want to stay with her. by talking you may also be able to work some stipulations into her "rule" ....although rules in relationships shouldnt be necissary . both people should eventually learn and know the others likes and dislikes. but no drinking? is she worth this? Im not saying drinking is all important but if this is the beginning what else is she gonna pull out of her hat....next thing u know you cant hang with the guys? talk to her ask her why, thats all i can say. if you want to be with her then find some compramise FAST. If u let her get away with this rule there will be more to come
2006-10-31 05:57:13 · answer #4 · answered by Coyote 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'd agree with her, personally. Yes, in a way it's controlling. But as my family has a serious problem with alcoholism, I've lost three family members to drunk driving, and drinking causes more fist fights among my family than anything I've ever seen... I don't think it's an unreasonable thing to ask.
You don't say why she doesn't want you to get drunk. It makes me wonder why she would say that. There has to be some deep issues.
I know my issues are deep. Good thing my husband doesn't drink anyway so I don't have to say anything.
2006-10-31 06:24:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
No she is not controlling. Maybe having a boyfriend/husband that gets drunk is something that she absolutely cannot/will not deal with. If so, then that's her right to feel that way. If you feel like you have to get drunk a couple times a year & she's totally against it then you should go ahead & leave her.
2006-10-31 06:22:36 · answer #6 · answered by lil star 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
depends on if you're an alcoholic or not. If she's saying that because if you do it one more time she'll leave you because you're a miserable drunk than no. But if you are not an alcoholic than yeah, its a bit controlling I'd say. But is it really worth leaving her? If this is her only issue and she's not a freak maybe you should talk it out and tell her that you are not into the whole dominatrix thing. She's not your mother and you will make the decisions regarding your life.
2006-10-31 05:56:25 · answer #7 · answered by Phaylynn 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
why doesn't she want you to get drunk? has something bad happened before when you got drunk? If not, then yes, i think it's controlling. Unless, she had someone else in her life that was really mean or cruel when they got drunk, if so, then you should just explain to her that you are not them. But, if your drinking is more important to you than she is,(it must be if you are willing to lose her over it) then you don't need a girl friend anyway. You just need to go party and live your life and let her live hers.
2006-10-31 06:07:39 · answer #8 · answered by LittleLady 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
have you done something in the past to harm you, her or anyone else while intoxicated?? If you have then I understand where she is coming from.. But if not then she is definitely way too controlling.. but if you would choose getting drunk over being with her then I don't think you really want to be with only her anyway and are looking for a easy way out... I think you are ready to move on.. Life is too short to waste your time (AND HERS)
2006-10-31 05:56:58 · answer #9 · answered by sunkiss 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She probably had a bad experience with someone that was drunk and cares for you enough that doesn't want you to be the same way. Isn't she worth not getting drunk?
2006-10-31 05:54:56 · answer #10 · answered by ginger13 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes!! It's not like you're an alcoholic. Everyone gets drunk once in a while especially for holidays. If she can't accept that then Leave Her ***!!!
2006-10-31 05:58:34 · answer #11 · answered by latingyrl2184 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋