when it comes to you and your spouse? Every time i ask on here about swinging or bringing in another person to my bedroom (including another guy), the people on here, and women in particular, jump all over me and tell me that i'm crazy...Am I? every question a committed woamn asks about getting DP'd gets rave reviews, so WTF?
2006-10-31 03:52:05 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
if you do that why bother getting married?? Love is also sharing the whole life with the person...dinners, doing things all that
2006-10-31 03:54:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Women are totally capable of separating love and sex. The thing is, when we love the man we are with, we don't want to share. Lemme rephrase that, most of us, don't want to share. You have to respect that. If you ask your wife, or girlfriend to think about bringing someone else into the bedroom, we think, what is wrong with ME. Do I not satisfy you enough? With good reason. Not only that, but you have to think about this too. Once you do this, it will never be the same. You will always want to try new things and you can't just go back to how it was. What happens if you bring another man in, and he pleasures her more than YOU do. Then there is the possibility that she may leave you. There are so many scenarios you can put together. But, most of the time when a women enters into a relationship with a man, she wants you and only you, and if you want otherwise, you run the risk of losing her. So, it is really up to you. What do you really want, and is it worth it? Shyt, rent a porn and watch it together, then you have a couple different people in your room.....LOL!
2006-10-31 12:00:17 · answer #2 · answered by kimmypoo 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
there is a big difference between making love and having sex. why everyone jumps on you I don't understand. swinging works well for some couples and destroys others. my partner and I are swingers at my suggestion. yes I am the female in the couple.
most of the people who are jumping all over you are closed minded and were raised that sex is only between 2 people in a committed relationship. they don't understand that sex is about pleasure... and making love is about emotions..... yes you can have sex when making love but you can also make love with out any intercourse.
I am happy with my partner but like a little extra attention in the bedroom area ...a little extra spice.
don't want to sit back someday and wonder what it was like...so I'm living it now.
2006-10-31 12:23:48 · answer #3 · answered by ladysilverhorn 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I as a female could care less. Do I feel the need to go out and have a 3-some no but that doesn't mean I need to jump someone for it. To each their own. I don't think it means that a couple love each other less than I love my husband or more either. I know how to separate the 2 but am happy only having to give that to 1 person. You want to do it, go for it. Have fun
and btw I am not a liar either. Not all women are jealous people.
2006-10-31 11:58:51 · answer #4 · answered by ~*~frankie~*~ 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Once you and your spouse cross that threshold where you DO separate love from sex, you might as well consider your marriage to be over. I don't think that it's a matter of morality as much as it is commonsense.
It all depends on the type of marriage you want, though. If you don't particularly care who your spouse has sex with, I suppose it's all right...but, usually, you're just opening the doors to more trouble than the average man or woman can deal with.
2006-10-31 11:56:43 · answer #5 · answered by dingobluefoot 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I dont agree with what you want to do but im not going to flip out. If this is what you where interested in then you should have talked about it before you got married bc not all women want to seprate sex and love. i know for some men sex is just a get off kind of feeling but for most women it is a special kind of bonding. espcially since society says its wrong for us to be with more than one or two partners in a life time. Every couple is different and needs different things. most women find it special to have one man want to ravish her body over and over again where men tend to get bored quickly. Maybe try to get your wife to role play with you instead. Get outfits she would never wear out just for the bedroom and pretend to be different ppl. This tends to turn my husband on alot. Espically playing the hooker or the cluesless virgin act once in awhile makes him crazy. So i hope this helps
2006-10-31 11:59:58 · answer #6 · answered by starrmerlan 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Theres a huge difference between making love and having sex.. I totally recognise that. Even in a loving relationship, just sex happens instead of making love. Sometimes I want to just have sex instead of making love. I do believe that if both parties involved agree to involving another person, what business is it of mine? If it works, great!
2006-10-31 12:07:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can totally separate sex and love. In that I mean I can have sex with a man I dont love and just because I had sex with him does not mean I love him or will ever fall in love with him. What your asking is totally different. Having threesomes is a totally different situation. I could never watch a man I love having sex with another women. That is just ridiculous.
2006-10-31 12:01:46 · answer #8 · answered by JustMe 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Because, swinging, threesomes, orgies, whatever, are things you do with a person you don't love. It's just sex. When you actually LOVE someone, you don't degrade them that way. Of course, if it is something you both want, that is different, but pressuring your wife for your own gratification is wrong. If you want multiple partners, you shouldn't have gotten married. That's sort of the point of being married.
2006-10-31 12:00:09 · answer #9 · answered by Lotus 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I know a couple that does that, but the husband is not completely in love with his wife.....he says he does it because its what she wants. And he doesn't want to loose his kids. So he just puts up with her S****T and does what she wants and I guess her next thing is looking for a foursome. She does separate sex and love. I think we all do from time to time. Especially when we have been in a long relationship.
2006-10-31 12:16:23 · answer #10 · answered by D K 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might consider a 12-step group that addresses these types of maladies or addictions such as sexoholics anonymous or sex addicts anonymous. Check the business section of your local phone book and call the local intergroup office of alcoholics anonymous first and see if they might be able to put you in touch with such a recovery group. If not, call the business office of the Catholic Diocese in your area. God bless you brother and I do wish you the best.
2006-10-31 12:10:15 · answer #11 · answered by soulguy85 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋