he doesnt want sex at all!!?

Question

my partner and i havent had sex for about 7 months now,proir to that it was about three times a year(weve been together 5 years.i have tried everything but if i go near him he pushes me off,we have no intimacy at all.He ie definetly not having an affair,i take care of myself and have been told im attractive-but he makes me feel ugly,im only 28yrs old and hes 34,i love him in other ways but i have a high sex drive and i dont know how much longer i can live this celibate no intimacy life.We dont even kiss,a peck on the cheek if im lucky.i have had no problems in past relationships,always had very active sex life prior to him-HELP

Answer 1

Express your feelings to him. If he doesn't change, try a separation, with the understanding that you are going to see other people.

Answer 2

It sounds like he may have issues you are not aware of. It may be performance issues he is embarrassed about, or it may be something from his past that is much more devastating. You need to sit him down and explain that you cannot be in a marriage without intimacy. You need to stress the fact that things need to change, and that you two will work together to fix this problem. Let him know that the problem will be addressed as a couple; do not put it all on him.

Answer 3

Something is definately not right... that's a "given"...
I would say that it could be either that he IS cheating and you aren't seeing it for some reason. (denial??)
Or that he has an emotional problem that is preventing him from being affectionate.
If there is absolutely no affection, which is seems, than I would say that he's cheating. (could even be that he's satisfying himself with pornography...same as cheating because you are no longer meeting his needs, others are..even if they're not physically together)
Either hire a private investigator or do some quiet investigative work yourself.
If you still find that he's not cheating then I would sit down and tell him that it's time to get honest. Let him know how you feel and take it from there....

Answer 4

You can not have a healthy relationship, without a sexual connection, it is impossible. I am not saying that sex is the most important thing in a relationship but it is in the top three. When making love to a person,there are alot of emotions both spoken and unspoken that you share that help to recharge ur batteries. If there is no spark, then u just have a room-mate that is acting as your warden, keeping you from one of life's great pleasures.

Answer 5

Thats to the point of really low for a sex drive...is he masturbating, how is the sex when you do have it. Do you think he might be gay? As much as that sucks, it is a possibilitiy. Don't try to come on to him or anything, and tell him you really need to talk to him. Tell him you don't want to make him uncomfortable, but you need to talk about sex. Tell him how you feel, and point out that you have been undertanding for 5 years about him, now he needs to listen and understand you needs, and ask him straight out whats up. something I think is wrong with his picture, my hubby has a lower sex drive, but the longest we have went was 1 1/2 months or so, and there are times when his drive goes through increases, as well as the decreases. Talk to your man and tell him that its bothering you, not just in a sexual way. but on a emotional level, and a solution needs to be made or the relationship is bound to fail.

Answer 6

As you get older, sex isn't that important anymore due to working long hours and a lot of demands on an individual which leaves them tired at night. I don't know if maybe he is stressed about something which makes him feel not as good as he wants to in order to please you and maybe that is the reason for the sexual dilemma. Maybe he had a hard day at work or he has other worries. Try to create a different location and try to seduce him. Maybe he just needs a change of scenery.

If that doesn't work have him see a physician to check for underlying causes of his sexual dysfunction. It may be that he has a cut on his penis or a sexually transmittable disease that he is ashamed of telling you about and doesn't want you to get it. Might be herpes or something he contracted in his youth.

Good Luck!!

Answer 7

You are going to have to talk to him, or you might not be able to keep going with out being unfaithful.
As a man I think this is rare, most of the men I know usually say its the other way around.
It is sometimes something easily changed, my wife and I kind of went through that, almost got devorced over it, finally she told me what got her excited, more foreplay in her case, anyway I had to put a little more effort into helping her enjoy it more, but the end result has been good.
Somethings will not work themselves out, you have to work them out.

Answer 8

If you're positive that he isn't having an affair and you're positive that he isn't homosexual, I would seriously suggest taking him to see a doctor. Perhaps there is a medical reason he is so uninvolved. It could be the sign of something seriously physically wrong. Take him to a doctor and then both of you go to a sex therapist. This isn't going to get better without some outside help. He could be very sick.

Answer 9

NO! there is no longer something incorrect with you. I overlook the top statistic even nevertheless that's something reminiscent of two out of three women do no longer orgasm for the period of penetration on my own. I particularly suspect that your friends are merely talking huge. What you should do is relax. study what makes you sense sturdy by way of your self - that's completely ordinary, besides, how are you able to tell HIM what makes you sense sturdy in case you do no longer be responsive to your self?! And in case you on no account orgasm for the period of intercourse that's not the top of the international - merely make beneficial your boyfriend lavishes you with different styles of foreplay and affection and you will quickly see what's so magnificent. BTW - do no longer overlook to play secure!

Answer 10

im in a similar situation with my g/f except she gives me what i call a duty screw. she does this cuz as she says she loves me, i think it is to keep me coming around. i do know that i want more than just putting it in and getting off. i have tried to talk to her, romantic things etc... and none of them worked. for u it is not going to get any better so u either have to leave, or find ur pleasures else where. im open if u are interested

Answer 11

3 times a year, to me is crazy, but some people do have low sex drives. You don't sound happy, and your partner should make you happy, or at lest try.

So I think you need to move on.