My wife has an affair but when i find out im not as angry as i thought i would be.she was a virgin so she was experimenting-but i should be pissed.even more i kind of horny off the fact that she got ******.is it cause i finally got someone else to compare my dick too(she said i was better but of course she said that).anyway am i crazy cause i get mad when i think about them doing it behind my back.i get so infuriated.but when she tells me bout it i be like oh and get turned on.no i am not gay ,i dont wanna see no penis but i have to admit i dont know why im only angry when im away from her but not when she's around.help
2006-10-31 03:05:18 · 11 answers · asked by THE M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Love, plain and simple. When your away from your wife you have time to think and ask yourself questions and get yourself all upset.
But when you see your wife you can't be angry with her too much because you love her. Maybe because she was a virgin when you got married and probably (just guessing) didn't talk much about sex, now that she is talking about sex, that might be what is turning you on. I suggest if you want your marriage to work, spice up your sex life and don't do the same boring routine, if you keep it interesting i dare say your wife will look else where again
2006-10-31 03:14:44 · answer #1 · answered by bubba1pup 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing wrong with you. You have this thing going on where you are together and you love her. You don't really want to fight so you don't. Then while you are apart your mind starts to work and then the not favorable stuff comes out. All perfectly normal.
It sounds like you can look by this and move on. You really should get some assurance that she won't pull this again though.
Presumably she got her answers and the need has passed. Everyone can get a second chance but a third is a lot to ask.
Been There.
2006-10-31 03:33:57 · answer #2 · answered by Flagger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It a top dog mentality.
"I'm the best so she came back to me" kind of thinking.
Its a total denial of the betrayal.
If you are able to find something you like its not a betrayal on her part.
From what you wrote I would also say you haven't come to terms with her affair yet.
You will need to eventually confront her about everything. I would recommend for her to tell you how everything happened and for her to come up with a way so it doesn't happen again that you can verify. Trust will come when you stop checking on her.
I would start looking for the problems that lead to the affair, because I doubt that she had it just because she was curious.
2006-10-31 03:45:51 · answer #3 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think on some level, you feel turned on because you know that she is desired and wanted by others, but she is YOUR wife. I think it turns you on because you feel that she would not do anything like that or you felt that she wouldn't even be into doing something like that. She may be the quiet, innocent type that like to do things in order, nothing exciting and new. Once she did that, it was a turn on to you because you didn't expect it from her. I also think that it also brought out a little "freak" in you. Not saying you are gay, but it fulfilled something in you on some level or another. I bet you would have a threesome with her and another woman ; )
2006-10-31 03:20:31 · answer #4 · answered by AMAZON 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i been throw that but my wife did have sex she cheated on me emotional with some guy one line .. when she told me it made me made but i did go crazy i ask what they did on line and stuff and i became horny and i like the though that my wife was learning new thing from this guy.. but ever time i was alone i get mad and upset ... so man i no how you fell ..
Update my wife and i are still married and now very Happy she no-longer chat as much as she use to and the guy she had a fling with is now only on once and wailed so if i were you give it time and it will pass or just stop the pain and move on from her.. Good luck.
2006-10-31 03:19:20 · answer #5 · answered by celticdragon 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that you are just curious to see her have sex with someone else, but you want to be there to see it. Maybe you two should set something up with another couple. I know you aren't gay or weird like the the other people have said. You are just curious and want to explore your relationship on another level. Ask your wife what she thinks about doing something like that. You may be surprised!
2006-10-31 03:12:29 · answer #6 · answered by lil_momo2003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you could be swingers. Seems like there are couples out there who do that sort of thing and don't get jealous. I don't think I could, but then again the chance never came up. It does seem weird that you only get mad at her behind her back.
2006-10-31 03:16:12 · answer #7 · answered by Ben V 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your weird
2006-10-31 03:07:38 · answer #8 · answered by dumpllin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry, not qualified to answer this question. Your wife was a virgin?????
2006-10-31 03:36:37 · answer #9 · answered by Rebekah M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everything.
2006-10-31 03:08:49 · answer #10 · answered by I Am He As U R He As U R Me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋