My parents don't like my boy friend we love each other and plan to get married and start a family. My parents hate his guts . We've been going out 4 2 years. What should i do is there anyway i had sign a marriage licence my self i don't care what my parents think about my boyfriend. all that matters is that we love each other a lot. Im adopted and am 17 is there any way i could live without my adopted parents .like divorce my parents and live with foster parents.
2006-10-31 00:56:44 · 15 answers · asked by Flaca 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What's the hurry? If you're 17 and you think this is a good age to get married and start a family, your parents are probably right to be against the relationship.
2006-10-31 00:59:21 · answer #1 · answered by Shane 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh don't do that. Your parents love you and wanted you from the beginning that is why you were chosen. They want only what is the best for you. Don't rush into anything. If you and your bf are planning a future then it will happen. First and foremost though you must finish your education and become self-sufficient just as he must do the same. In this way you will be partners and not just 2 people full of fear and rushing to do something.
I had this problem with one of my son's. His gf's mother is an abusive woman who has never had a stable relationship in her life and was bringing her daughter up to do the same. She didn't want her daughter seeing my son because he doesn't come from that dysfunctional background and it made her daughter more aware of the situation at home. It made the mother fearful of discovery and what we would do. Inevitably, we provided her with a safe home and reported her mother to the necessary authorities who looked into the situaltion and found merit. However, both kids have focused on school and on getting careers. If they end up together that will be okay, however, they are not even thinking of that until they finish their education. They are both doing exceedingly well.
If your parents see you doing well in school and also getting involved with activities and maybe even assuming responsibilities of a part-time job. They won't be quick to judge the relationship as bad. However, if you have let everything go and are being sexually active then your parents are correct to try to eliminate the bad influence. The fact that you would consider abandoning them w/o abuse being the cause is an indication that his influence is not one conducive to your best interests.
2006-10-31 09:11:06 · answer #2 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First slow down, don't burn no bridges, when you turn 18 years old you can do what you want. Just hang on for one more year, and if he really loves you he will still be with you. You don't mention how old your boyfriend is, if he is over 21 years old that may be the reason your parents don't like him (and he must be grown or he would need his parents permission to marry also). While you are waiting (during that year):
Make sure he has a steady job and can support you and a family.
Make sure he is not shagging any other girls.
Make sure YOU can support yourself without help from him or your parents (because if you go against their wishes, they may cut you off and refuse to help you.) and it's not easy to do at 17 or 18 years old.
2006-10-31 09:11:28 · answer #3 · answered by Daddy Big Dawg 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you stopped and asked them why they don't like your boyfriend? does he treat you well in their eyes? Does he have manners when he is around them? You are 17 that's too young to get married and I can say that because I got married at 19 and missed out on alot. Like living alone ang being your own person is what you need to do before taking the big commitment you have the rest of your lives to get married so please don't rush it and talk to your parents even they only your adopted parents they're still your parents that love you and care for you and only want the best for you. Find out why they dislike him and work from there.
2006-10-31 09:02:02 · answer #4 · answered by cutiepie81289 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're only 17, you have to live with your parents. Whether they adopted you or gave birth to you, they are your parents and are trying to protect you. You are their responsibility. Why don't they like your boyfriend? They have lived and learned, maybe they see something in him they don't like, talk to them and listen. They don't beat you, they feed you, clothe you and take care of you as parents should. Listen to them and after you are 18 you can do what ever you want. My advice is to grow up before you get married. It's harder than is seems and if you cut out your parents in your life you have nobody to fall back on who cares.
2006-10-31 09:05:55 · answer #5 · answered by Muslimah 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Are you really in that much love that you can't wait? The longer you wait the more special it will be. Parents usually have pretty good reason not to like a boyfriend etc. Not to say they are always right because they/we are not...but if you can hold out for awhile and make sure? If he loves you and vice/versa love can wait a lifetime. It is only a piece of paper...It won't change your love...
2006-10-31 12:31:18 · answer #6 · answered by bbmk333 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl.......dont do that you are young and i been throught the fire and back out with a man who said he loved me. if you want to be with him you need to take your time to marry there is no rush in doing it. Parents always have a reason for feeling how they feel there is a reason that they dont like him for you. Family is too valuable to just turn your nose up to them like they havent invested their life into you. they want the best for you and in the process of wanting the best they some times try to make you do what they feel is best for you. talk to them with a spirit and willing ness to compromise some things like(marrieing this guy)you are young and while it may look like life is all about meeting your prince charming, it is not. Go to college, find out what you want to do for your future, pursue some childhood dreams, before you waist your teenage life and jump into adulthood, because while you are playing house right now. Playing house and actually making a home is too different things. If this guy loves you he would push you to explore other options so you can actually have a chance to live you teenage years, and not lose them and the people that love you enough to care about who you are dating.
2006-10-31 09:15:50 · answer #7 · answered by cinder_nelle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should calm down my dear. You are too young to get married and too young to step out of your home and live alone. Calm down and don't make any irreversible mistakes. Try to explain to your parents that he is not what they think he is, and that he loves and respects you, and above all he makes you happy. If they don't want to understand this then yo have to be patient and wait. You may keep seeing this guy and try to preserve your love, and then when you are 20yrs old and you are able to live on your own you can take a better decision.
Don't hurry up and think things well before you act.
Good luck
2006-10-31 09:10:04 · answer #8 · answered by atrabel 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you only 17 years old, u still young, dont rush into things with the getting married.You parents are just worried about you, at the end of the day if you want to be with him then that is your choice, they cant do anything about it. Tell them that they are going to loose you if they keep on going on like that.If you want to marry him ONEDAY they must except him.
Dont know why they dont like him, mayb they have their reasons but at the end of the day its up to you.If you love him and you are HAPPY, then dnt worrie what they say, just ignore it.
You can leave the house when you 16.
2006-10-31 09:02:59 · answer #9 · answered by Lady_Y 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your boyfriend loves you as much as you obviously love him, then he needs to recognise how imprtant your family is to you and do everything that he needs to do to make it right.
People don't just wake up one day and think "gee I'm gonna hate him" There has to be some underlying issues that you already know about.
Your not going to like this sentance, but I write it with great admiration due to you trying to get advice on it, but... Grow up and act like an adult if you want to make an adult decision.
2006-10-31 09:21:00 · answer #10 · answered by Triestobewise 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋