marriage vows are taken as a joke now days and divorce is so normal why is that? you see it all around us.....why get hitched if your not going to honor your vows? i mean i understand adultery, domestic violence and things of that nature but when you dont have a valid reason then what????
2006-10-30 22:50:05 · 15 answers · asked by MR.E 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I believe it is because a lot of people forgot that GOD takes marriage seriously. And many have left the path that GOD wanted them to take. (Some) Man was to only have one wife, but not only is he married but have a mistress on the side. (Some) Wives sneak off to the side to be with another man because her man isn't fulfilling her needs. 1 Cor 7: 10 -16 man and wife not to seperate. Hebrews 13: 4 Marriage bed be undefiled, and how god will judge them.
I remember a women telling me years ago that if everyone follow what the bible said, what GOD wants us to do, that this would be a safe and beautiful place for us.
Many people aren't. And the Devil is sitting back happy because he knows when GOD does away with him a lot of people is going to down with him.
That is why there is so much crime and cheating, killing, lying, war, diseases, children without fathers, children without mothers, children without both, no trust and belief in one another, no love at all.
For instance if a man and woman married for love, like they SHOULD have in the BEGINING and realize that neither is perfect and will make mistakes. Both are mature and ready to care for the others needs UNSELFISHLY.
Rarely would either even THINK seperating because they love each other. Even during an argument neither would be thinking that the other would leave them. Because both would know that this is a union made by GOD, (what GOD has bought together let NO MAN pull apart, and no man pull apart INCLUDES them) and that they love each other very much. So where is the worry in the first place? And this love and devotion would pass down to the children and their childrens children.
But most have left GODs way, and that is why marriage is not taken seriously anymore.
Then there are those who get married too young just to get out of the parents house because they want to get out and do what they want. They are not even thinking about what can become of them and/or the consequences for their actions. But they do not care just as long as they can DO what THEY WANT.
It take maturity to stay together. Mature people would love someone because they love them for who they are.
Most marry because of what that person can do for them.... it will not work that way.
Give you an example. A man marries a woman because she is very shapely and great muscle tone all over her body and she is desirable to him. She has long, shiny hair in the color that he loves so much. Her eyes are a beautiful blue that he has never seen before. She is just beautiful. Well sorry to say this he is looking at her like he is buying furniture for his house. There is no love there. ONLY DESIRE. So it will never work, EVER.
A man in love sees the flaws and love them because they are a part of the person he loves. She has feckles but they do not bother him because it is a part of the person he loves. She is a little heavy he don't care because its more of her to love.
(Please understand this is for both man and woman)
I know of a man who married a very unattractive women, yes ugly. Many people were shock by this. Until they got to know her and hear her talk. They found her to be a very lovable person and so caring that immediately they saw why he married her. And so did I. LOVE is real. DESIRE is not.
When you are in love is long suffering, love is kind, love is not jealous, love does not brag, love does not look for his OWN interest, love does not become provoked, love does not keep account of injury (Hold a grudge). Love never fails. And it doesn't. Look how much GOD loves us. Giving us a chance to change our ways. Not forcing anyone to do what he says. But allowing us to chose on our own if we want to worship him and do what he said or just do what we want. Our decision. I know if many people marry the way GOD said, there would be LESS diseases(because of cheating mates), killings (because of cheating mates), lying (because of cheating mates), motherless or fatherless children, (because of divorces and leaving the household to be with the person their are cheating with),
2006-10-31 00:46:17 · answer #1 · answered by vhat40 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The reasons divorce is so common to day is because the people ,,, Kids really ,,,, aren't mature or responsible enough to understand what they are getting themselves into ,,,, Right after they get out of school they all of a sudden want to tie themselves down to something they don't understand ,,,,, For allot of people today it's I do until one of them doesn't want to any more ,,,,, That they've finally figured out that they weren't really in love after all,,,That they were just in lust ,,,,,So they aren't going to feel any more concern about breaking up ,,,,, than they did about getting together in the first place ,,,, This isn't just a teen or young adult problem exclusively ,,,, Sometimes people as old as 30 or more have these problems too ,,,, Some people have this problem and never get over it either but it's more common in the younger set ,,, Teenagers and young adults are normally selfish and self centered ,,,,, There's nothing wrong with that because it's normal ,,,, They've never had to consider anyone else in their lives before so it takes some getting used to,,,, They are usually brain dead to what these vows really mean ,,,,, The sad thing about this is ,,,,They usually come to these realizations one or two or even more children too late ,,,,, They don't understand the gravity of the situation or what they are doing in reality ,,,, They aren't adult or mature enough yet to know and understand what the word commitment or consequences means or what they entail ,,,, The children that come from this union didn't ask to be born ,,,,, So when they do arrive you can add another word to the word commitment ,,,,,, With the arrival of the first child comes the word OBLIGATION ,,,, Where are the children going to be with out the parents that brought them into the world ? ,,,,, What happens to them when their parents go their own way ?? ,,,,Will these children ever experience the comfort or feeling of security the way you did when you were growing up ?,,,,These are questions the potential parents should be asking themselves BEFORE they take any vows or say any words of commitment ,,,, These young people should concider how much they love their children before they have them ,,,,,, But like I said too many of these young people are blinded by their need to satisfy their natural urges to consider anything else at the time ,,,, So they need to understand that a later separation isn't necessarily going to hurt just them ,,,,, but also the possible young ones that come from this union ,,,,, Right after they finish school they are old enough to get themselves in this jam but they aren't mature or responsible enough to handle it ,,,,,,I've always thought that marriage is a state of mind not a fact of law ,,,,, So all of this is the reason why divorce today is so common ,,,,They've got this whole thing about devorce wrong ,,,, It can cost upwards into the thousands to get a divorce and only penny's to get married ,,,,, It should be the other way around ,,,,, It should cost thousands to get married and only penny's to devorce ,,,,,,, Maybe that might give cause for these young people to do a little more thinking before the commitment is made ,,,,,, Sad isn't it ? Yoda said this ,,,,,
2006-10-31 00:32:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a matter of fact 'divorce' is the most undesired allowed thing in marrige. Marriage is a life log contract, agreement of detemination, its gift to human from GOD Almighty. Its has high religious, moral, ethical, human values. But sorry to say that these days due to deterioration of all the values, the marriage has made a joke ~ a shame to human society. Practically no difference in human being and animals. Therefore divorce became cheaper than half cup of coffee and frequent like breathing. If this trend continues then what will be fate of future generations?
2006-10-31 00:29:31 · answer #3 · answered by MY Regards to All 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I completely understand, I even agree with you. I didn't get married thinking to myself well if it doesn't work out, I can get divorced. But I did, I was given no choice I was married for 7 years the last three were horrible. I tried and went to therapy for my marriage worked everything out to the best of my ability. You don't enter into divorce lightly. I felt like a failure, I disappointed myself, my family and my God. It was devastating.
He was an addict and throughout his addiction he cheated many times. He was never abusive physically but you can imagine the mental toll it took on me. After he went to rehab for 6 months was sober for a year I found myself pregnant (we were told we couldn't conceive so we have a miracle). So after being sober for a lil over a year he fell off the wagon, having a child I went right to a lawyer. My son is going to see some evil things in this world his home is his comfort zone and I promised him he wouldn't see that in his comfort zone. So i did it I got a divorce. I did what was best for the both of us.
Don't judge people that get divorced, you don't know the story can't compare everyone and think you know everything. Its not right to Judge a book by its Cover! God Bless.
2006-10-30 23:43:17 · answer #4 · answered by HereweGO 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Satan... he has influenced our nations govt & laws... making it so easy to just flee from marriage at the first upset.
The media- they make you beleive that love is fleeting and if its not passion all the time then its gone sour. Its just not true- love is service and sacrifice.
As our society continues on a downward spirial everything is about instant gratification.... always feeling a high. So when things get normal and challenges come to a marriage, which that is part of our growth.. poeple take off becuase its too hard and they are not committed out of selfish reasons.
Materialism.. marriages are often left second to careers and material posessions and desires.
Loss of integrity- people dont often keep their word any more. They look at it with such casual eyes and hearts.
If only people realize that the high divorce rate is damaging so many things in our nation and society. CHildren suffer, the economy suffers, the individual suffers, there is a huge strain on society as a whole.
The govt has set up systems to make it so easy for you to get a cheap divorce, get welfare, set up cheap housing for single moms with kids, daycares are everywhere making it easy for mom to go to work, and its all a set up for failure in marriages. Here we will help cush this for you to make it easy......
Marriage is ordained of God. It shoud be reverenced as such and entered into with a great regard for your eternal life. For your family is the only thing you will take with you from this life. And that will be only if you have been right with them.
2006-10-31 00:23:47 · answer #5 · answered by SunValleyLife 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Seems like everyone is getting divorced, I know 3 couples right now getting divorced and all of them have been married 30 years or more! Theres been no working on it they just leave and say there not happy..Its just way to easy these days to up and leave. I feel happiness is a state of mind, so if your not happy with yourself, then how can you be happy with someone else?
2006-10-30 23:01:44 · answer #6 · answered by Shem 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's called a lack of commitment. When people marry they don't make a real commitment to making it work. when things get rough they run.
I have been married for 34 years, we have had some problems as in any marriage but we have worked through all of them because of our commitment to one another.
2006-10-30 23:34:53 · answer #7 · answered by yakity_one 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I understand what you're saying.
I take my marriage seriously.-married 20 years
I know before we got married we talked about everything we wanted in life. We were engaged for a year before we got married.
A lot of people get married and don't really know each other.
2006-10-30 23:05:21 · answer #8 · answered by kitt_kattkitt 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
People get married for the wrong reasons. When the going gets tough they get out, its easier than having to work through problems. I think people get married to early too!
2006-10-30 22:58:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
too many options available for those divorcees. its not like the public would hit you to death with stones if you keep on divorcing, people and relationships are being taken very easily. no body cares about love and life.its all about self satisfaction!
2006-10-31 17:28:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋