I am now divorced. Before the divorce was even final I contacted the mother of my ex husbands 1st two children. We since then have become very good friends. She has been a very good source of support for me while dealing with my ex's manipulative behavior. (he's a cop) makes things worse. Now I find out that my ex has told our 14 yr old son that he does not understand why me and his ex mistress are best friends when we use to hate each other. It bothers me that my ex has these conversations with our kids to try an make me look like such a bad mother/person.
2006-10-30 19:26:34 · 13 answers · asked by cecimad 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's not so odd. You have a few things in common with her. A bad ex and kids by him. People don't need to have those kinds of restrictions in their friendships. I am still friends with an ex-husband and several of his lovers from both before and after our marriage. I'm not aware of him having any lovers during the marriage but I certainly wouldn't let long ago history determine my friends.
2006-10-30 19:35:19 · answer #1 · answered by Kuji 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
well you obviously didn't like her when you were married, because she was his ex-wife, but now you're his ex-wife too, so there's no more resentment. Instead you have common ground with her, and understand why their marriage didn't work, and are going through the same emotions she had gone through when they had divorced.
And besides ex-husbands, you probably have a lot in common with her, because most people have a 'type' that they go for. So i would imagine you 2 are quite similar in a way...from respect and generosity to perhaps appearance. You have common ground with her now and devolped a bond that was once hostility, and now friendship.
On the surface it may sound strange to some people, but you both must be nice women, since you both can get along now. He must be a real jerk though for you two to develop a bond!
Of course your ex is going to talk to kids about how horrible you are, it's wrong but he doesn't want to be the bad guy. He probably feels like you 2 have ganged up on him, and he doesn't want his kids to do the same thing. Quite childish, really. Talk to your son and simply explain that no woman is going to be best friends w/ an ex-wife. But things are different now. Tell him he doesn't need to understand, but he will when he's older. And tell him to never be like his father! lol
I think it's great that you had support through your divorce, i think you have to be brave to leave someone to begin with.
2006-10-30 19:38:43 · answer #2 · answered by Chrissy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe it looks odd to others and to him, but you both know him and have things in common. sometimes such a person can be a better friend than regular friends who may find some fault with you. you can support each other emotionally as there's a connection between you two.
i am in a similar situation- i separated my husband from this mistress and now we are kind of friends- not best friends though. i trust her more than i trust him.
2006-10-31 05:14:14 · answer #3 · answered by monica06 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It may seem a little odd but if the friendship is working out then continue it and hopefully ur ex can get some help for his controlling ways.
2006-10-30 19:49:57 · answer #4 · answered by erika_pimps 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have something in common. Friendship is not selective. Go ahead and be friends. Two more people in the world settling their grudges. Life is a miracle!
2006-10-30 19:34:13 · answer #5 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like the ex-gals club!! Get together and enjoy!
2006-10-30 19:33:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
nothing is odd and everything is odd. this is the way you are thinking.
But it is good to think nothing is odd
2006-10-30 19:35:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I think you both have a lot in common. Enjoy!
2006-10-30 19:30:45 · answer #8 · answered by barkel76 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
not really your man choses the same type of women, its not off that you'd both get along
2006-10-30 19:29:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you think it's odd, then yes it is odd to you.
2006-10-30 19:28:23 · answer #10 · answered by jacksfullhouse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋