Adultry???????????

Question

I met a girl last friday and we began seeing each other. I then came to find out she is currently married. She is very very unhappy in her marriage right now and is going to separate from her husband. The only question is she doesnt know when. Shes hoping to be out by March. Is it wrong of me to continue seeing her. She claims that she is only married on paper. She feels nothing anymore for the guy she's with. I sorta broke it off with her tonight but I kinda feel bad cuz we really like each other. Help me I need moral guidance. Ive never been in this situation.

Answer 1

tell her to call you when she is no longer with him.
untill then, i'd say to stay away.

Answer 2

Well I have been in that situation so here is the straight story.
There are many reasons why unhappy people stay in a marriage. Money is the number one reason and kids is the second one, a close tie.
If she does not have children with this man and if she has a job she has no reason to be dragging her feet. If she really means what she says then it will not be long until she puts her money where her mouth is and actually seperates from her husband. So, if she is sincere you do not have long to wait. If she is lying why would you want to see her anyway?
Wait and find out what she does, that is the smart thing to do.
Anything else is just a good way to get hurt. Not only that, it is a really lousey thing to do to another human being. Think how you would feel.
Forbidden fruit is seldom worth the price you pay. Stick to your principals and you will never go wrong.
I will give you another valuable piece of advice even tho you did not ask for it ( two for the price of one). There is an easy way to know what the right thing to do is in a hard situation like this. Ask yourself what would be the easy thing to do. Then ask yourself what would be the hard thing to do? The hard one is the right thing to do. Works every time, I hate it but it is true.
I hope for your sake that she really does leave the guy.
Love and Blessings
Lady Trinity~

Answer 3

First of all, how do you know that she is telling you the absolute truth about her marriage? She wasn't up front about her marriage from the beginning, now was she? Secondly, if her marriage is only a piece of paper then why can't she leave until March? You are right for feeling guilt. If you two are truly meant to be, then she will find you again when she is no longer married. But for now, save yourself a lot of heartache and pain by just turning the other cheek. Let her know, that you really like her, but that you will not continue seeing her while she is still married. That is my moral advice. Best wishes to you.

Answer 4

Whilst I don't know this person and I have never been in the same situation myself, I have known plenty of people who have. The fact of the matter is this - so many many people (men and women) fall for someone other than their spouse and make all the promises this girl has made to you. Some of them have no intention in following through on their promise and some of them have every intention but wind up finding the break with their husband/wife too hard, too messy or too painful.
This girl may really like you and she MAY have every intention of leaving her husband and starting afresh with you but you unfortunately have no assurances this will happen. Do yourself a favour and exercise a little self-preservation and stay away from this girl. Under no circumstances should you get involved with her again until she can personally guarantee you her undivided attention emotionally, morally and legally. Good luck!

Answer 5

I guess my ? is what are you looking for from the "relationship"? As a miserably married woman who is out there, she might be loving the attention and- yes i'll say it-sex. When you are getting absolutely nothing at home, coversation, jokes, affection, sex, it is natural to want those things. I am on a few sites looking for men who are ok with the fact that i am married & still want to have fun. She's entitled to movies, dinner, dancing. If you two share that.....Thank You! With no offense to her-b/c I KNOW how she feels-don't count on an immediate resolution. I know in PA it takes 4-6 mo. fo a divorce to be final. so unless she's already filed... i think u get me. I guess my point is-after all the blather-is if you two are friends, then remain so. The marriage is an issue only if you want to take it farther or if when she files he gets her for adultery. Man I hate that word!!! good luck baby. PS PLEASE DO NOT MAKE ANY BABIES!!! that'll really confuse the issue!

Answer 6

Drop this like a hot potato (for now)....I've been married and divorced so I'm not totally ignorant to the whole concept. It comes down to respect. If you like this women, do it right. Wait until she leaves her husband and files for divorce. Your saying March.....that's 5 months...how much do you really like her...are you willing to wait 4-5 months? No matter how right it feels between the two of you, IT's NOT. You'll be the one looking like a home wrecker and a jerk and she'll look like a tramp. People will find out and the trauma of it all will more than likely split you anyway. Dude, your SINGLE,,,,love it! Why claim ownership to someone Else's marriage problems. If you have time for this then you've got time to go out and meet SINGLE women. Divorce is a hurt-full experience even if it is amicable (sp?) ....stay out. The odds are against you. Go do what you like to do.....party like a rock star...go to midnight mass....whatever your into......let her take care of her paper work alone. Cut the ties and I bet you in May she is still married!!!

Answer 7

You did the right thing, by breaking it off. Alot of times, that is just talk about leaving. If she is that unhappy she would have left before now. You did say, you just met her last week, so was she not unhappy before you met her? Then there's always two sides to every story. You don't want to be with her, and her husband or someone he knows see you with her. That will cause unnecessary trouble and you only just met her, so you really don't know the real truth.
Don't feel bad, you will meet someone else, that won't have that drama.
YOU DID THE RIGHT THING...

Answer 8

Unfortunately, life is sometimes not so morally cut and dry. I'm in the same situation she is in. I am moving on and leaving my husband. It is hard and having the support of a man that is on your side makes it easier to move along quicker. You know what the morally right thing is to do. Marriage is marriage until it is divorce. Decide though if she could possibly be the one before you cut her off though. Good luck!!

Answer 9

RUNNNNNNNNNNN. 1. She is not truthful (she did not tell you right away that she is married). 2. She tells you a story, but has not taken any action to split from her husband. (She is playing you). 3. How could you ever trust her in the future? 4. Find someone new who is NOT married and can be trusted.

Morally?? What you did is wrong! What she did is wrong! What a way to start a relationship!!

Answer 10

Im not trying to be the 'Moral Police" but you asked.

Marriage is a legal union between two people. Because this woman feels a particular way for her husband at any given moment does not justify committing adultery and dragging you in it.

You should respect yourself enough to search for a woman who does not NEED to latch onto a man. Someone who wont turn around and cheat on you.

Answer 11

Married means UNAVAILABLE. And she should have told you FRIDAY that she was. Going to separate ISN'T separated yet. I think you were totally in the right in breaking it off.

If I were you and I really thought that maybe there is "chemistry" there I would tell her that as soon as things were official you would like to "re-visit" the idea of seeing her then. Until then, she's not an option.

You don't want to be considered a "poacher"... :/