last year i found out he had an afear with my daughter from my first marrage and what i taught was my grand daughter with her husband have turned out to be my husbands child, i have no friends no family and have to rely on him for every thing now i have a big empty hole in my heart and so lonly at 57 i feel i will never find any one i dont go out or drink i have always been a stay at home mum any advice i just wish i could find some one that i can love and trust just to be happy again i cant even think back on my life witout hurting i would have him leave i am so afrade of being alone but i dont love him and cant look at him ,
2006-10-30 12:10:06 · 24 answers · asked by va_d2002 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Oh, he's a whack job. A seriously gross individual.
Make this time your time. Don't look at it as being "alone". This is your free time!! Time for you to discover things that you like and that you want to do without the worries of reporting to someone else.
Get that divorce going and keep looking forward.
2006-10-30 12:13:08 · answer #1 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
sorry about what had happened. You know that there is nothing wrong with being alone for awhile. It is not like you need to have a man in your life. Why not go and find a job this way you can make new friends and have money of your own. You could waitress or babysit. There is also taking care of elderly people. There is a lot out there if you just look. Being a stay home mum has made you ready for anything. You know that you also have your computer to make new friends. I think that it better to be alone then be with someone that you don't love or can't look at. Plus you never know when or if love will come knocking at your door. Just don't give up and keep your chin up.
2016-05-22 13:27:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him - he's a jerk and isn't anywhere near good enough for you!
You don't need to feel lonely - when I left my ex, I found that I stayed at home all day for a while too! You have a great opportunity now to expand your horizons, without him or anyone else holding you back! Do you have hobbies? Or are there things you've always wanted to try? Join a handcraft group for social contact (quilting, tapestry, embroidery, knitting....). Join a choir (one that includes men!). Smile at people and ask them about themselves; your confidence will grow, and you'll come across as friendly and interested. You may find (far more than I do - I'm only 40), that single men in your age group are widowers, not couple-hood's rejects (if he's 40 and still not married, there's a reason...).
Far from feeling lonely and trapped by being single, why don't you see it as an opportunity to enjoy your freedom? Good luck, and as we say in New Zealand -
Kia ora (be healthy)
Kia kaha (be strong)
Kia manawanui (be of good heart).
2006-10-30 12:30:14 · answer #3 · answered by ~jve~ 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I do empathize with you. Your Husband is a jerk because when he married you he became the father of your children, have you talked with your daughter about what lead them to sleep together? You stated many times that you feel lonely or you don't want to be alone but you are never truly alone when you have "GOD"! You should seek a lawyer advice and file for divorce him, because if you stay what is that saying about you? Don't you know that you are worth more than what your husband and your daughter did to you? Start saving some money and look for an apartment for YOU. Then start making friends, join a club or something you will probably find the person for you and who will love you for you. And, do me a favor each morning when you wake up tell yourself "I LOVE YOU". You have to build up yourself esteem and know your worth. I wish you the best.
2006-10-30 12:27:57 · answer #4 · answered by JO`NAE 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Welcome to the lonely hearts club. You are not alone, there are many like you out here. Don't stay at home by yourself, that is the worse thing you could do. When you are alone you think, think, think, way too much. Join a singles group in your area, start going to a good church and find comfort there. You will find someone, if you just open your heart. Most of all start forgiving him, not for him, but for yourself. Work on letting him go... Best of luck.
2006-10-30 12:30:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is hard, you need to find a new life for yourself. Have you ever thought of going back to school say maybe some collage class's. you would feel better about yourself and also get to meet and make new friends. Once you feel better about yourself you will want to stand on your own two feet and do what you have to do. Leave Him. Then you need to start working on the relationship with your daughter and grand-daughter they are your family and a daughter always need their mothers know matter what they say in the heat of an argument. take care of yourself first and foremost..
2006-10-30 12:22:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
you need to get some help to deal with all this mentally. Being alone is better then being screwed over. Being alone is not easy if you have no friends for support you need to find SOME. Many organizations have support groups for divorced people try to find one. I'm sure you are very hurt by both of them. Make sure you tke care of yourself you can't change other people or the things other people do. You can only control what you do.
2006-10-30 12:17:04 · answer #7 · answered by ally'smom 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I can't blame you for how you feel. You've been betrayed. By both your daughter and your husband. Now its time to move on. The hurt inside will last awhile but you are stronger than you realize and can make it. Take one step at a time, one day at a time. You are so lonely with him, at least you have a chance at true happiness once you are away from him. Give it time sweetie, things will get better - in time. Take care.
2006-10-30 12:30:06 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you're lonely, you might as well be alone(you said you're afraid of being alone, but it sounds like you already are). As far as financially, start applying for jobs immediately and you might get some alimony.
For meeting someone else, I'm not going to lie and tell you everything's going to be easy. It's probably going to be awful for a while, but you have to go through the pain to get better. Otherwise, you will stay in pain with this guy for the rest of your life.
2006-10-30 12:18:20 · answer #9 · answered by Nep 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
What kind of life are you living with him there breathing your air? He's not worthy. What's up with your daughter? That's the relationship you need to be REALLY concerned about. Get yourself into some counseling and don't you dare blame yourself. It's going to be hard but get into yourself and find out what you really want. If you depend on him financially, get a job and save save save! Anything to get you a bit of money and occupy your time. I wish you th best.
2006-10-30 12:34:33 · answer #10 · answered by BB'sMom 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋