OK, I go to a midwifery office where there are about 6 different midwives on staff. I've seen 3 so far & have really liked them all-except one. She's new-she's from out of town & just started working at the office I go to. I do not like her at all! Her tone of voice is condescending-she totally talks down to me. (it's a long story). Anyway, I have requested to see one of the other midwives at my next visit, but I don't know if I can be sure I won't have to see her again. My question is: Should I say something to one of the other midwives? I do not want her to be at my labor & delivery. However, I don't want to sound like a *****, but I really feel she treated me poorly & maybe some other patients have had the same experience. I'm on public aid, so it's not like I have many options. BTW- I'm 30 weeks.
2006-10-30 08:58:40 · 9 answers · asked by Red 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
How do I voice my opinion/experience without seeming rude? I really don't want her to be the one to do my labor & delivery.
2006-10-30 08:59:56 · update #1
I've seen her twice & didn't say anything the first time because I thought I should give her another chance. It was worse the second visit.
2006-10-30 09:05:02 · update #2
You have every right to say. "I did not like the way _____ treated me last visit and I do not want her at my birth." Say it before you are up on the table and in a less powerful position. You could also say it at the end of your visit. if they give you a hard time ask for a reference to another practice!
If pressed you can detail the conversation and explain that you need to feel safe during the birthing process and she was not supportive. You need people you can trust to help you bith your baby, establish breastfeeding, and advocate for you at the hospital.
2006-10-30 09:05:52 · answer #1 · answered by Terrible Threes 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell the midwife at your next visit that you don't feel comforta ble with her and ask that u don't have to see her.
when it comes to delivering your baby im sure you have a say who u do and don't want in the room. the nurses and midwives who look after you should try and make u as comfortable as possible when u are in labour so you and your baby dont have any stress!
i dont think you sound like a ***** at all..
i had my visit yesterday i am 38 weeks pregnant and they dont even want me to go back for another visit until the day before i am due! i think that is rediculous.
i was supposed to get my ultrasound results off them and they gave them to me and asked me if they thought the results were ok. aren't they supposed to know that? thats was why i had to come back on monday instead of friday like normal . oh well.
anyway you have a right to say something and part of the midwives duty is to make you feel comfortable so speak up on your next visit, im sure the other ladies will understand ....
2006-10-30 17:06:44 · answer #2 · answered by Krissy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, hmm, I wouldn't be at a midwives office anyways. Have you researched any stats on them? I did, and they are scarey! They get sued, and have deaths and such all the time. If you email me I could get some of the websites I used together. Anyways, when you do not want to be in someone's care, you have every right in the world to refuse it and make it known. It is your body and your choice basicly. Maybe you feel that way for a reason! I would make it known at the office and to the others. Don't worry about being rude when it comes to your health. Honestly, I wish you would have gotten an actual doctor, but good Luck!
2006-10-30 17:03:57 · answer #3 · answered by angie_laffin927 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Have you seen the one you don't like more than once?
If not, then I'd suggest giving her one more chance at an appointment. It may be that she was just having a bad day before.
If you've seen her more than once and are certain that you don't "click" consider talking to whichever midwife you like best and feel most comfortable with about attending your birth. Find out if it would be OK to request her when you go into labor. When it is close to your due date, try to know who will be on call when.
2006-10-30 17:03:32 · answer #4 · answered by momma2mingbu 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just say that you don't appreciate the way she treats you. You are an adult and she shouldn't be talking down to you, and you shouldn't feel like you have to take it because you're on public aid. If no one else is able to see you confront the lady about it, don't be afraid to speak and demand respect.
2006-10-30 17:03:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this delivery is all about you, not her. Just let the midwife you are most comfortable with know that you are uncomfortable with the other lady and that you would prefer that she was not present during labor and delivery.
2006-10-30 17:03:03 · answer #6 · answered by greeneyedprincess 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell one of the top people(yes we are talking pecking order) that you really don't have anything against this lady, you just have an uneasy,uncomfortable feeling around her, and that you would really prefer, that you have someone else be with you!
2006-10-30 18:53:13 · answer #7 · answered by rae 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Labour and delivery is hard work and you want to go through it with someone that will support you.
2006-10-30 21:21:59 · answer #8 · answered by lividuva 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just mention that you are not comfortable with her. It is your labour and you need to be surrounded by the people who will help you.
2006-10-30 17:01:41 · answer #9 · answered by PLDFK 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋