I have a boyfriend, im 19 years old, and im not too fond of sex. i find that i play with myself often, about 5 or maybe 6 times a day!!!
My boyfriend doesnt't like it anymore and say's its a turnoff!!!
so, can i know how many times a day/week do you "finger yourself" or masterbate.... cause i think i mite be over doing it!!!
And what can i do to calm down on masterbation!! please help!!
2006-10-30 04:06:34 · 27 answers · asked by R M 1 in Health ➔ Women's Health
Masturbation is 100% natural and normal, for women it is particularly healthy because as well as being used to induce menstruation and miscarriage and easing menstrual cramps masturbation is a necessary part of most women's sex lives. You know your body better than your partner does; you know what you like and how to pleasure yourself, so carry on pleasuring yourself.
Women and men are built differently, during penetrative sex only 30% of women reach orgasm, fewer still ejaculate when they do orgasm, the main stimulus point for women's genitals is the clitoris which is rarely stimulated during penetrative sex, as such masturbation and other stimulation is vital. Masturbation is sex, it is part of sex, not just sex with yourself but also as part of sex with your partner, as such your partner should be encouraging, learning and joining in on masturbation. Masturbation is an important part of a person's identity and sexuality; it is contact with your own body, self-pleasure and expression of your sexuality.
Tell your boyfriend to politely get lost, it is your body and your sexuality, it has very little to do with him and if he is going to disrespect you, your body and your sexuality in this way then he is not being very fair on you – don't stop this or reduce it for his sake, he is in the wrong, not you. He was very rude to say this to you, obviously this has upset you and undermined your self-consciousness, don't let him do that to you, stay strong and carry on as you have been doing, if he does not like it he can stuff it.
Masturbating 5 or 6 times a day is not abnormal; in fact it is perfectly normal, I've certainly known women masturbate a lot more than that, and hell I've done it more than that. I'm asexual myself so have very little interest in sex, however I am still a sexual person and average about 1 or 2 times a day, you however I am going to assume are either heterosexual or bisexual and I am also going to assume a sexual being, this is you, it is normal for you – it is only unhealthy if you masturbate to the point that it is ruining your life (such as if you'd rather masturbate than go to work or spend time with friends) or masturbate with odd objects (like cheese graters).
2006-10-30 12:36:01 · answer #1 · answered by Kasha 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is absolutely nothing wrong with masturbation - it's perfectly healthy, and everybody should do it.
This is especially true for teenagers - after all, your finger isn't going to get you pregnant, give you an STD or infect you with the HIV virus!!!
It's your body, not your boyfriend's - so tell him to mind his business.
Now, it's funny, you masturbate 6 times a day but don't like sex
Could it be that your boyfriend doesn't know how to make love to you - maybe he can't pleasure you properly? If so, maybe you could have him finger you the same way you finger yourself?
2006-10-31 04:48:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You obviously enjoy what you are doing to yourself and not what your boy friend does to and or with you. You need to ask why does he not give you the same pleasure. Probably 5 times a day is a bit excessive, it may be a physical problem or boredom and seek any pleasure you can find.
As a 19 year old girl you really should not need sex like that and to bore with sex a guy suggests all is not well in the relationship.
Take a real look at your life. Do something that makes you feel alive. Sex should be the summation of having a good time, the cream on the cake, a brandy after a good meal, not breakfast dinner and tea rolled up with supper.
2006-10-30 04:30:39 · answer #3 · answered by mouse m 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Masterbation is a healthy thing to do. Probably the safest sex out there! In order to cut down on the masterbation, find something else to occupy your time.
I'm in a very sexually active monogamous relationship, I don't have to as much as I used to, but I do still do it.
Rock on with your bad self!
2006-10-30 04:21:43 · answer #4 · answered by mindrizzle 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not unhealthy for *you*...5-6 times a day is certainly on the high side but not at all weird, especially for someone young. It does seem like it may be unhealthy for your relationship with your boyfriend, especially if you aren't enjoying sex.
I hate to whip out the "can you talk to a couple's counselor?" line, but it seems appropriate in your case. The fact that you seem to have a high sex drive but dislike sex (I assume you mean intercourse) might mean that you both need to work out some issues in order to have a happy and mutually fulfilling relationship.
2006-10-30 05:13:44 · answer #5 · answered by MissA 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your BF is just not pleasing you. Maybe if you told him what feels good and teach him how to do it right, he would enjoy getting you off. I know if I had a lady that was as horny as you, I would be doing my best to help you out. I love it when I get a woman squirming from my touch.
I think he is butt hurt because he is feeling left out. That he can't satisfy you. Include him in your pleasing and you might be suprised.
Men really are like dogs, we like to be told we are good and get a pat on the head. Throw him a bone and teach him what you like. Don't be afraid to be completely open. You will be in for a good suprise.
2006-10-30 04:16:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi, well dont worry you are quite normal....maybe you 'are not too fond of sex' because you have already had so many orgasms by yourself...so why not go for a day not masterbating and see what the sex with your bf is like then....enjoy!
2006-10-30 06:40:59 · answer #7 · answered by Susie Drew 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you know your body better than your bf does, so it's easier to do it yourself. Just try teaching him exactly what you do that makes you enjoy it more. Then maybe you can spare yourself some of the work hehe. ps-no man thinks its a turnoff unless he feels like he's doing something wrong
2006-10-30 04:22:52 · answer #8 · answered by BellaRia 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is not healthy for a woman or a man to do, on a consistant basis!
Communication is very Important in a relationship. Respect each other, and share with one another your wants and your needs. Share with one another how you can please each other sexually. Women need ALOT more foreplay than men. And men need to be Very Patient toward there woman during foreplay, giving unselfishly, desiring to please unconditionally!! Going slow during foreplay is important.
Calming down on masterbation? Exercise helps alot. It releases the same endorphines which come forth from masterbation and sex, and giving almost the same release and satisfaction. Consistent exercise, 3-5 times a week, half hr. to an hr. each workout is the Key!
Think on other things. This will help alot. Be aware and mindful of what you are thinking at all times. "As a man or woman Thinks(on), so he or she becomes!!"
Sex is Good;but developing other interests, hobbies, a sport maybe or simply running, or jogging(or whatever other form of exercise you enjoy, besides sex & masterbation which some may call exercise).
This sounds like a question a young man is really asking, not a woman. Maybe disguising himself as being a woman in the question and explanation;but I may be wrong.
If it is a VERY VERY Bad problem or challenge for you, you may want to go through some Cognitive Behavior Therapy! This would guarentee success.
2006-10-30 05:06:31 · answer #9 · answered by Thomas 6 · 0⤊ 5⤋
well i dont really think there is anything worng with it. but your boyfriend needs to be more supportive, and fugure out what it is that you like. in order for sex to be pleasurable both of you need to communicate what you like and dislike. why dont you teach him how to maturbate you and dont be shy to tell him how soft or fast you like it, that way he wont mind you doing it. also forplay is a big one. the more you forplay the more pleasure you will have during sex. communication is a big issue, guys dont know how to read our minds and if he cant meet half way with you or is only thinking about himself then maybe he isnt the guy for you, but dont be shy tell him what you like that way he wont be left in the dark. hope i was of some help..and againg this is my opinion, im not a doctor.
2006-10-30 04:56:57 · answer #10 · answered by MUSCOVY 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋