2006-10-30 02:15:24 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I was in the exact same situation when I was 21. Pregnant, unwed, and attending college. While the babies father and I are not together anymore it has all worked out for me in the end and there really isn't a reason if won't for you. It is going to be a lot of hard work, whether you are with the babies father or not.
The only person you should be concerned about right now is YOU. Are you OK with being 21,pregnant and unwed...IF the answer is Yes than don't worry what other people think. If the answer is No then you need to change something.
2006-10-30 02:20:53 · answer #1 · answered by yzerswoman 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Bad? No, its not - congratulations.
You question marriage, but dont make it clear whether you are single or not...
I dont think that women need to be married to be mothers AT ALL. I dont even think we need a man around. Heck, im married - happily, i might add - but it simply isnt important in the grand scheme of things, a relationship is a relationship whether you wore a silly white dress or not. Even single Mums get by just fine, it may be hard work, but its also very rewarding - take it from someone who knows.
Hopefully being 21 means that you have finished your education & can work to take care of yourself & your baby? Sure you could have waited a year or two, but what for? Did you have any plans? It could well be that this baby gives you the motivation to become the best that you can be, to work doubly as hard & to make both your & your babys lifes worthwhile.
I wish a happy & healthy 9 months & beyond.
~~~
I got pregnant for my 1st child at 21 & had my 2nd a year later, i spent a while as a single Mum - during which time i also went back to school & purchased my own home. I didnt marry till i was 29.
I am now 31, have a bigger home, 4 children & im not done yet.
You can be anything you wanna be.
Good luck
2006-10-30 10:45:26 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not bad at all, Im 21 and 7 months pregnant, I just got married 1 months ago and it was more so we could plan our finances better and get life insurance for the baby, We had been living together for 3 years and I dont think is important to get married, marriage does not make a difference on the baby, my parents never married and didnt separated when I was 5 I know it was better that way, better alone than with bad company!
2006-10-30 10:25:18 · answer #3 · answered by audrey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first thing you need to ask is if this is what you want? I was also 21 when I got pregnant, 22 when he was born - he's now 12. He is now the oldest of five that I have and he's great. My husband isn't his biological father, but he did adopt him. Neither of them have an issue with it. It was VERY hard having a baby, alone. If you what this and think you can handle it, it's up to you. I hope for your sake and the child's that the father will be involved and be supportive for you. Either way, this will change your whole life, think long and hard! I'm so glad I made the choice I did. Like I said it was difficult, but worth every moment!!
2006-10-30 10:29:17 · answer #4 · answered by msr9805 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing bad about it.
The only way in which it would be bad is if you couldn't take care of yourself and you baby. But there are many organizations out there that can help you get on your feet, and with enough work and determination, you can go beyond just surviving. This is, of course, without the support of your family.
You're not married, but that's not an obstacle.
And you're pregnant, so that should cheer you up. You have a compelling reason to work your butt off.
And study, please, even if it's just a simple online school or by-mail education. Try PennFoster. They're affordable, and good, and all done from home. That is, of course, if you're not educated.
Well, that's my two cents.
Good luck.
2006-10-30 10:19:56 · answer #5 · answered by Mario E 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
not bad at all. it seems like eveyrone is doing things backwards theses days and with the divorse rate so high who even wants to get married any more. YOu did not mention if the father is there or not, but just because you guys arent married doesnt mean that he cant be there just as same as a husband. I hope you have the love and support you need. COngrat on your baby. ALso I am 22 and half way through my fifth month of pregnancy, and im not married, i couldnt be happier :)
2006-10-30 10:24:18 · answer #6 · answered by estkijedsco 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it is not bad at all. Everyone goes through different 'challenges' at some point in there life, and yours could very well be a good one! Hopefully you have a support group in place, and a place to stay with your baby, and all that good stuff. If you don't, you can still get it. I was 18 and homeless with my son at one point and he's now a very bright 14 year old teenager. There are a lot of programs out there, I'm sure you'll make it. You are already planning and looking ahead, as evidenced by your question, so give yourself some credit!
2006-10-30 10:26:15 · answer #7 · answered by Sweet! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No its not bad that you are unmarried and pregnant. Just make sure that you can provide for yourself and your newborn. Take good care of yourself during your pregnancy and make sure you go to the doctor on a regular basis. No missed appointments. No matter how healthy you may think you are things can always happen but are less likely to if you keep your appointments. Try to save money so you will have some put aside when you have to take maternity leave. Hope I dont sound preachy as I dont mean it that way at all. Good luck with your pregnancy and stay strong and healthy
2006-10-30 10:23:47 · answer #8 · answered by x0x_sassieangel_x0x 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the 21st century and by now I would think that people would be over the witch hunt and inquisitioning age! We are here and making mistakes and bad choices in life on a daily basis. What we need to do is help each other out and learn from these experiences. I can't blame you for what you caused in your life, because I don't know the whole story as many out here don't either. Instead of judging you or branding you a bad person, I would rather like to support you and the daily struggles you are faced with and what may lay ahead for you. These days, many women live a single-parent life and are not always in a position to make that choice...like I said, I don't have all the facts! You need to take responsibility for the here and now and understand that life goes on with or without others intervention! Be strong and take charge of your life and do something for yourself and your new arrival. But most importantly, take courage and ask for help, like you did here, but with people and professionals who live and who you know closer to you and in your community. No, you're not a bad person for any of the reasons you stated, just someone like the rest of us seeking answers and support! Good luck and take it easy on yourself, ok?
2006-10-30 10:32:27 · answer #9 · answered by HotInTX 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it isnt the ideal way of starting a family but who is anyone to judge. Nobody has the right to jugde anyone. I am 20 with a 13 month old son... not married.... and being a single parent. I dont care if it is bad or not because i am doing what i have to do for my son. As long as he has everything that he needs then no one can judge me. So sweet heart dont care what others think, you just go and handle yours and the lil one that is about to come.
2006-10-30 10:46:54 · answer #10 · answered by homie_j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋