...her continue cheating as long as I am enjoying vastly improved sex? We have been married almost 18 years. Sex was horrible/infequent and we both had issues and bitterness in the bedroom. A few months back we moved to her old home town, she hooked up with some of her friends from her highschool years who were stoners like she was at one point. Yada yada yada.. she is now getting stoned regularly and screwing a number of guys with one guy kind of a steady boyfriend. I had been a pretty much moral person saying no to drugs and disapproving of cheating - but I have learned to accept her new behaviors since she will leave me otherwise.
She lost a bunch of weight, started shaving all over, new hairstyle, etc. She looks great!She went from being a frigid prude in bed to extremely wild and experimenting in the bedroom. She now does everything I ever wanted in the bedroom and is willing to do things I had not even considered before. Do not want goodsex to end
2006-10-30 02:09:05 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She had been depressed with a poor self image. Now she is confident and sexy.
I would prefer affairs to end and it be just me but am selfishly afraid if it does then great sex will end.
Yes I know that this is messed up
2006-10-30 02:10:44 · update #1
I know the whole situation is messed up. Maybe I have been kind of not trying to think about the whole STD thing she had cheated with a number of men with no protection before I found out. So if I was gonna get something guess I figured she would already have given it to me...
She has told me that more than a few of the guys were better/bigger than me(I am about average size). Some of them willing to do things that I am not. She has had a number of DP with other guys at this point. How am I gonna compete with that in bed? I have zero interest in either a 3way with another guy or anal sex with herI guess (am I the only guy that is not into anal?)
I think I still lover her - although distance has built up...
.
2006-10-30 04:31:31 · update #2
She needs help and so do you for staying and putting up with this!
2006-10-30 02:13:12 · answer #1 · answered by Gerry 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well I have to say this is absolutely amazing! Am I your wife? I have been married for fifteen years. I have also cheated on my husband about 3 times in that 15 years. I feel bad about doing it but I have to admit our sex is always way better afterwords. I can not explain why exactly but it is. I think it is refreshing in a weird way.
I think my husband may feel the same way you do. I have tried to have talks with him about this and see exactly where he stands on the issue. But so far I can not really get him to give me a good solid answer. I know he does not really approve. I also am pretty sure he is not going anywhere. I also am pretty sure he greatly enjoys the benefits that go along with allowing this behavior.
My biggest fear is that he will sooner or later get fed up and drop the ax on me.
I would say you need to make it clear to you that you really don't like it but you do like the benefits and you are never going to leave her over something like this.
There are all kinds of marriages in this world. Not just the ones that seem to be socially acceptable.
Enjoy and have fun!
P.S. If you can give me any tips on talking to my husband please let me know. Maybe no talk about it at all is needed.
2006-10-30 02:57:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all, both of you should get tested for diseases frequently seeing as how she likes to experiment with others too. And you need to talk to your wife and see if she would rather have you or the other number of guys she's sleeping with....it's your decision, no one can tell you what to do. But my suggestion is that you talk to your wife and discuss what her cheating does to your marriage.
2006-10-30 02:15:56 · answer #3 · answered by val 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to leave her and find someone who will be faithful to you. first, you will also have to worry about her bringing home diseases to you and she might even think sex with one of her partners is better than you and leave you anyway. She's not deserving of you, you deserve better, besides nothing good can really come out of cheating and you have to wonder if one of her partners is better than you. And, remember this, whom ever she is having sex with and how many, when you sleep with her, you are sleeping with those people as well.
2006-10-30 02:17:34 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok um cheating is not a good thing. u good get some stds or somtheing. so u should put a stop to that. it is ok for her to do drugs as long as it is marjuna b/c it doesn't do alot of harm. u can still have good sex with someone who is not a cheating *****. excuse my language. but it is so wrong to cheat espically if u have been married for 18 years.
2006-10-30 02:14:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't have it. I mean her sleeping with other guys, but if you're comfortable with that then more power to you. I put a lot of importance on fidelity and it's just not something I'd be willing to sacrifice for the sake of good sex.
2006-10-30 02:13:47 · answer #6 · answered by St.Anger 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, if you are willing to accept her new behaviors, then that is up to you...however, she may be having unsafe sex, and do you really want to catch somethign that can kill you...insist that she use protection and get tested for STD's every six months...also, use s condom with her. and i would probably get some kind of divorce agreement and evidence started, just to protect yourself in the event it all goes bad.
2006-10-30 02:12:24 · answer #7 · answered by moluvsmark 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope while you are enjoying her in the bedroom now you have taken all precautions against STD'S and by the way you could pick up a prosty anywhere.
2006-10-30 02:13:37 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever works for you works. Just be careful. Make sure she has protection when she goes on her outtings. Maybe you should join her, I don't mean you have to get stoned or anything, but you can watch or maybe join in. Just BE CAREFUL! STD's are bad.
2006-10-30 02:12:17 · answer #9 · answered by little_timmy1983 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I think it's selfish - and I think you could end up hurt by the whole thing. Your wife needs help -she is hurting herself and you are just standing by letting it happen because suddenly you are getting good sex. Don't you even remotely care about her?
2006-10-30 02:12:56 · answer #10 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They say for better or for worse.... So if you are enjoying this i do not think that it is wrong but however, you should be very careful in bed because there are things out there that will get you.
2006-10-30 02:15:44 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋