I'm a mum of 2, 5 and 15 yrs old so for them I have to celebrate somehow. Ideally I'd love to do a hedgehog, and hibernate til say Jan 4th.
I really would appreciate some ideas.
Thankyou
2006-10-30 02:00:00 · 33 answers · asked by Kate J 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Other - Holidays
i understand that you are feeling really low, but you must try and make it a great xmas for the childrens sake. let yourself relax and concentrate on the kids, be a kid yourself and get amongst them and have some fun to take your mind off it. danger is that kids will start to dread xmas every year if they associate it with you being sad and depressed. once kids are in bed and settled for the night, its your turn, if you want a cry, then thats fine, go ahead and cry. pour yourself a drink and sob your heart out, get it out your system, as long as you have some time out for yourself privately, you will get through this, keep your family close to you. good luck and i will be thinking of you and your family this xmas
2006-10-30 02:12:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh you poor thing, i can imagine how dreadful you feel, and it will be terribly difficult for the children as well, especially the 5 and 15 year olds.
I can only suggest that you have a simple little Christmas, but try and incorporate all the usual traditions of your family. Put up a tree, go to Church, do what you usually do.... even though your heart is not in it.
Maybe you could go to someone else's for Christmas?
Without knowing your cirumstances, it is hard to advise, but dont get bogged down with doing things you dont want to do.
God bless you and the children.
2006-10-30 02:11:41 · answer #2 · answered by Caroline 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My sincere condolences. I lost my father, years ago. It is so hard on the holidays when you loose someone so close. I think it would be best to start a new family tradition, and also find a way to honor your husband. Take the kids to do something fun for them. Make something at home to remember their father by. I like the cruise idea , but not everyone can afford that. Maybe a cabin in the woods. Or simply a relative that you haven't been to see for a while. My Mom became a hedgehog after my Dad past. I don't think I saw her for a month. That can be truly hard on the younger ones. They really need you. Maybe the older one can help you with them , when you really need to hibernate. I think you will need to find time alone to get through your thoughts. Are there any adults around that can help you? Friends , Neighbors, etc. Don't be afraid to ask. They will understand. Also, don't try to "Celebrate" when you really don't feel it.The kids know that you are dealing with this too. Make the best of Christmas that you can- Gifts , Dinner, Pictures, Songs. Invite Your kids friends for them to enjoy. So many different things you can do. Its all up to you and how you feel. I am so sorry for your loss. Take your time, to heal. You are not alone. Lots of Love .
2006-10-30 02:26:05 · answer #3 · answered by LoveMyLife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep it low key.
We always make a big deal out of Christmas and I love it but this year we are so skint we can't even buy presents, plus I'm having my first baby - due on December 8th so even if we can get the money together by the end of November I won't be up to Christmas shopping.
Any extra money we've had had gone on preparing the nursery and buying baby things!
We're going to decorate the house, have some nice food and few inexpensive presents but that will be about all we can manage. I think the baby's arrival will throw everyone off this year.
2006-11-01 09:33:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So sorry for your loss. Your children will feel this as hard as you so you all need to keep busy over Christmas. Ask them what they want to do but have a few ideas in reserve.
You don't mention any extended family but they could be a godsend if they are of the right type. What about close friends? Could you have some visits to family and friends?
Remember your partner, would you want to include his memory in your celebrations? Celebrate all the nice things he did and have a good cry if necessary.
Going to church can be a good thing especially for your young ones but your 15 year old will be very vulnerable so include him/her in your planning as "an extra adult".
Best of luck for the future.
2006-10-30 02:12:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for your loss. Holidays are always hard after you have experience a loss like you have. The important thing to remember is that you have a family that needs you. They understand and are feeling the loss also. Try to keep yourself busy with Christmas activities and talk with them about Christmas's from the past. Share stories about their dad and show them that just because someone passes doesn't mean they are gone from your lives. As long as you keep the happy memories, you have of him, he will always be a part of your lives. You could donate toys or clothes, that all of you go together and pick out, to a charity in your husbands name. Make it a tradition that keeps his spirit alive and part of the season.
2006-10-30 02:08:43 · answer #6 · answered by Tammy G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry! Throw yourself into the holiday however hard it may be at least for the kids. Buy some new decorations, start a new traditon, find someone else who is hurting or in need and surprise them with food or gifts (involve your children in this too), buy gifts for yourself as you buy for your children and then wrap and give them to yourself, get some new holiday tunes to listen to etc etc etc. Quite simply try to mix the holiday up a bit by doing some of the same traditions and adding new ones to help you all find new excitement and joy in an otherwise hard situation. Time will help heal your wounds. . .trust me! Good luck to you and your little family!
2006-10-30 02:11:00 · answer #7 · answered by fannie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss! That's hard with young children.
For your children, you could start a new Christmas tradition. Maybe on Christmas, you could have everyone say one thing they appreciate in another family member (always happy, encouraging, helpful, kind, etc.), or one thing they are thankful for. (a warm home, food, clothes, friends, etc.) This can help you to realize the good in life, even though you miss you loved one so much.
best of wishes.
2006-10-30 02:05:49 · answer #8 · answered by ♥honey♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel the same way every year. It is hard to get motivated to do anything, but finding something new and out of the ordinary will help you take your mind off of the dread. With kids 2 and 5, it is hard to do any kind of charity or homeless help but taking them to a sunrise service or getting out to a place you havent been before outdoors to play with new toys and just simply getting out of the house to go and spend the day always seems to help!
2006-10-30 02:08:16 · answer #9 · answered by ♥monamarie♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry for your lost. I feel sad knowing that Christmas become so horrific for some people as it become a financial nightmare. If you are a christian, tell your children what is actually Christmas about, perhaps take them to local Church, normally they have some activities for small children and teenage during Christmas and after new year, and specially the 15 years old, she/he should be able understand if you tell him/her the situation and what is the true meaning of Christmas - not the high street Christmas.
2006-10-30 02:22:15 · answer #10 · answered by Lilu 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋