Ex wants to deny me access to my kids, what to do?

Question

I've found out that my ex-wife is thinking about denying me access to my children, and is talking to a solicitor about it. This is utterly selfish and outrageous, I can't believe it and am furious off at the moment. She accuses me of the following:

When I bring them back after a weekend with me, their clothes are dirty and hair is untidy:- I accept that they are not as neat and clean as when she has them, but then she doesn't take them out to play rough and tumble in parks.
That I don't give them healthy food:- Not true, I admit I don't spend much time cooking, but I always try to give them a balanced diet, is beans on toast and then an apple a bad diet?
That I let them watch too much TV, and movies that are certified above their age:- I admit that I have let them watch Star Wars 3 and Pirates of the Carribean, but while I've been there and covered their eyes during scary bits.

Are the above grounds that could be used to deny me access?

Answer 1

I don't think so. Kids need their dads, and for her to keep them from you would be a mistake. Even though some dads may not be as thorough or perticular about certain things that a mother is, it doesn't mean that they are unfit fathers. At least you are taking the time out to spend with your kids on the week-ends, and playing and doing thing swith them, This is more important that if their hair is combed the right way, or if the clothes are neat and perfect. Kids need to be kids. Try and comprimise with her, make up a meal plan for when you have the kids and show it too her, and tell her that the time you have with the kids is just as important to them as it is to you, and that if she goes through with it, she will be hurting the kids, not just you. If you have a bitter break up, you both need to rise above your own issues, and do whats right and still be unified parents for your children. I hope it works out for you, and that she doesn't try this. For a judge to make that ruling, she would have to prove you to be a unfit father, which I don't see is the case.

Answer 2

As a mom that had a divorce and went through the same thing. I have to say she is right. Please don't be upset with me i am just pointing out to you what the courts look for.

First please tell me there ages
Yes it is true that they look neat and presentable whent hey come back home. If your not responsible to do these things this can prevent you from seeing them alone. (that is a minor issue)

Food- huge issue. It is very important that they get a home cooked meal while at your house. I don't consider take out a healthy diet. children are to have breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner.
In my case my ex husband lives in nyc and when he comes to see me he stays in a hotel. Since I don't want my daughter eating take out while he is here. I offered from the kindness of my hheart to make dinner of course with my family (im remarried)That is a major issue

Taking them to the park is not a bad thing they are allowed to play that is irrevelant

Yes you have to be very careful to the type of things they watch. They should be watching rated g movies star wars and pirates of the carriebbean would not be a ideal show well at least not for my kids.

Yes those can be some grounds
If you have any other questions feel free to contact me snugglebunnie2two on yahoo messenger.

Answer 3

Just to make you feel better my ex husband returns my children the same as you describe and I just pass it off as him being male lol. Nothing you have said is grounds for her to be able to keep you from your children. Check the website out in your state for family court or social service you may be able to find some guidelines there. Just in case she does try to take you to court document everything.........save reciepts, movie stubs, food purchases everything! Also keep a log book of your activitys with your children when you have them with dates and times......this sounds stupid but the court system will love it! I really don't think you have anything to worry about you are being a father and that is more then I can say for lots of parents. Good luck!

Answer 4

First I would suggest a lawyer for you. In what you have said, I see nothing that would harm your kids or make you a unfit parent to see your kids. Most Dads when they have their kids for the weekends tend to do just as you do. Play outside..get dirty, eat quick meals, but this is no reason not to let you see your kids. Keep up the good work! The time you spend with your kids is quality time. She should be happy that you want to stay involved in your kids lives, unlike alot of other parents. Good Luck to you!

Answer 5

Not to me, I think she is reaching. Are your children happy, well adjusted children? Are they thrilled to see you and sad to leave? You sound like a pretty good dad to me. Beans on toast im not so sure about lol but beans are healthy. If she is getting a solicitor you might want to consider the same just to be on the safe side. Good luck! God bless, I think it will work out just fine, especially if she is being ridiculous.

Answer 6

If this is all that she has to go on to take them away from you then it isn't about what kind of father you are... It's about control. If she is serious, you may want to call your lawyer. Otherwise, if your kids are happy while with you, you exercise your visitation accordingly, then she may have a hard time proving you to be an unfit father. She can no longer control you & how to care for your children while in your care, and she hates it!!!

Answer 7

First issues first, it really is going to not be his duty to furnish for *some* of her needs, as a guy and father he might want to furnish for ALL of her difficulty-free needs of nutrients, clothing, safeguard and housing. lots of the time even as fathers get custody yet another woman (in a lot of situations a clean spouse or female friend or perhaps his own mom) is the only which takes over the care-giving for the youngster. Your daughter must be with you. till now women human beings's lib, our society recognized this and all states gave decision to the mother because the suitable custodial figure after divorce and secure the relations abode so she might want to stay there and raise the youngsters (providing she became in good structure and wasn't at fault). Now, contained in the interest of the rights of fathers states are transferring in route of joint-custody (it really is negative for extraordinarily youthful ones who want the soundness of a first figure in the course of the very early years of existence) and legislators everywhere have taken heavily feminist arguments that fathers must be dealt with both till now the courts. Your baby must be raised by technique of YOU, not another woman who quite is conventional such as her and may want to be a passing impact on your youngster's existence.

Answer 8

take her to court , but u may want to limit what they watch and learn to cook, and make sure the r clean befor going to bed and when they get up , dress them nice and wash thier face and hands and make sure they r clean before going back to thier mother,r they grounds for denying u acces? they could be , u might want to take a parenting class, it could be helpful in court

Answer 9

No, she has no grounds and you just have to deal with it.

Maybe later in life the children will have their choice.

Too bad some women are just bytches

Answer 10

Anything is possible. If you can afford it, hire an attorney as soon as possible and get her for harrasment. all is fair in love and war and divorce, especially if she wants to deny your rights to your children