It has got to the stage where she rings daily and when I don't speak to her for a day she says, "I'd have thought you would have called today". I don't really want this daily communication, but at the same time, I don't to be rude. Is she lonely or something or what?
2006-10-30 01:15:49 · 10 answers · asked by The way I are 1 in Social Science ➔ Sociology
And then she'll say that "I'm sure we were married in a past life - we're so alike".
2006-10-30 01:26:52 · update #1
You need to set boundaries. It will be hard, but be assertive and frank. If she heeds the boundaries there is no reason you can't still be friends. You can set the boundaries gradually by just challenging her whenever she says something clingy. Like if she says "I'd have thought you would have called today" respond with: "But we only spoke the other day." You could even go on to say, "Look, is it something specific, cos I've got to get on. Maybe we could catch up over a pint at the weekend?" That way you keep contact to times that you want, and you can get on with life in between.
I don't think she fancies you. Just lonely. But she is lonely because she scares people off by being clingy. So just train her not to be clingy...
2006-10-30 01:30:41 · answer #1 · answered by helen g 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as if your views on the relationship is old work colleague, whereas hers could be 'good friends'. The fact that you don't contact her is hurting her opinion on your relationship. Neither of you is wrong but both of your opinions on the relationship does not match. You need to respect this person and her feelings by telling her as nicely as you can that you are 'not' buddies but simple work colleagues. Strange though the relationship has continued as it would normally phase out but she seems keen to take it to the next step i.e. close buddies and you are not. Which is fine but you just need to tell her that.
Other then that she might have a physical attraction to you, in which case again you need to be respectful and tell her you are not 'that close of friends' but still nice to stay in touch every so often and unfortunately your family and life commitments does not allow you to have any free time.
Good luck and remember be nice !!
2006-10-30 09:32:02 · answer #2 · answered by Mary O 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, she's lonely and, besides, sounds a little squirrelly. Pull back. Invent work projects and deadlines. If she doesn't get it, you can be terse but polite that you have other serious commitments that do not allow to to continue this pattern. In the end, be rude if you have to; it's your life she's interrupting.
2006-10-30 10:24:05 · answer #3 · answered by ElOsoBravo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she is desperate or maybe a stalker type! Try and drop gentle hints, such as a really busy time coming up at the mo, Ill call you etc as wont have time to talk if you call. Then just text her instead.
2006-10-30 09:26:00 · answer #4 · answered by Annie M 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope she doesn't have your address, because I would cut it off, before it becomes obsessive (which it sounds like) to the point of harassment. If she is calling you at home, get caller I.D., and don't answer. if at work, tell her it's interrupting your work schedule. If she IS obsessive, you'll find out.
2006-10-30 12:00:20 · answer #5 · answered by GiGi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is probably lonely and very sensitive. Change your phone number it's the only way!
2006-10-30 09:25:57 · answer #6 · answered by Muffin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
think that maybe she looks up to you or thinks tou relate to each other more than you do it is a hard situation you either stop the friendship dead or except thats the person she is
2006-10-30 09:18:50 · answer #7 · answered by phillip b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she's lonely. I'd phase her out of I was you.
2006-10-30 09:17:49 · answer #8 · answered by Wafflebox 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she sounds a bit clingy and possessive - just tell her you are busy and you'll be in touch soon
2006-10-30 09:33:31 · answer #9 · answered by rose_merrick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She proberbly fancies you.
Make a pass at her and let us know what happens.
2006-10-30 09:23:52 · answer #10 · answered by Tempest 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋