I love her very much and am shocked and confused as what do do next. I have questioned her as to if something is going on with her girlfriend and she denies it. What should I do? Is there hope I feel like I can't compete with this?
2006-10-29 23:46:34 · 17 answers · asked by keyhole 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If she is denying it, she is blatantly lying to your face if you found an email. You need to let her know how much you know. You honestly can't compete with another woman you have different parts. Have it out, the longer you wait the more pain n confusion it is going to cause you. Your own mind can be your own worst enemy, you can conjure up all sorts of images and drive yourself crazy and they most likely will not be true. TALK TO HER!!!!
2006-10-30 00:31:26 · answer #1 · answered by HereweGO 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yeah, I can see how you'd be in shock. Things may end badly but there are a couple of things to remember. Feelings are just feelings. They aren't actions, they don't damage anyone nor do they change anything. Second, it's not uncommon for folks of one sex to have feelings or urges for members of the same sex. Third, you always have the option of "doing something" as time goes on. Her finding an itch doesn't necessarily mean anything. If she has to scratch it, there still may be no permanent damage to you. Calm down, ask if she'd like to see a counselor and go with her if she would. You can only help yourself by being the best husband you possibly can be.
2006-10-30 08:10:38 · answer #2 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore the rude comments here!
I would say you need to start with talking with your wife. Can you tell her how you discovered the email? It could be as simple as your wife being 'bi-courious'. . .if it's not a sexual thing, maybe it's just that girlfriend relate on a level that isn't like other relationships. Strengthen your marrige by communication, and be gentle with this subject. Let her know you are hurt and confused. Therapy may help you both immensly, together as well as one on one. Maybe it'll help her see that girlfriends are girlfreinds, but she's in love with her husband.
Good luck, hon. xoxox
2006-10-30 08:05:05 · answer #3 · answered by misskenjr 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
think about it for a few days ,by then the main shock will be over then you will think straight. what would you like to do about it . what will you have to do if she leaves you for this girl . imagine it has already happend , how do you feel. will you stay where you live or move . all these things need thinking out. are there children to consider .if she insists on going on with the friendship /feelings /pick up what you want out of the house and go .
2006-10-30 07:55:34 · answer #4 · answered by clrdanlob 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be honest with her, tell her you know about the e-mail, get it all out on the table. that's the only way, maybe you can't compete with this, but maybe something can be worked out. You need to find out before someone gets hurt. Maybe she's just attracted to her and not going to act on it, or maybe she's coming out of the closet, either way, you need the truth. she's probably embarrased and not comfortable telling you this, or she would've already, but you have to talk to her.
2006-10-30 07:53:18 · answer #5 · answered by heather d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't compete.. but you dont' have to.. you have an apendage your wifes girlfriend doesn't.. Find out if she still loves you and will always love you.. If so be happy with your part of her.. :)
2006-10-30 07:55:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is there a problem. She is not looking to leave you for another man. You can not complete that is true, but there is no competition. Maybe some day it will work out for your benefit.
2006-10-30 13:05:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Damn this is every mans dream...LOL you invite her girlfriend over for a 3 some ...I know if I was interested in one of my friends that I would bring her home and share her with my man....
2006-10-30 07:50:17 · answer #8 · answered by Cassey L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to be open-minded about and explain to her that you will not judge her. Tell her you're willing to do anything to make her happy if she simply loves you like she always has.
2006-10-30 09:38:37 · answer #9 · answered by luedvic 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've seen this one before . in my opinion its best not to come off needy and scared . but what can you do really ? as far as I'm concerned any physical contact is cheating . good luck
2006-10-30 07:55:17 · answer #10 · answered by treefrog 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋