He has 2 kids with autism. We love each other very much but dont know how to give him advise. We dont live together yet. Just dont know how to help him with his kids any ideas? I dont want to say the wrong things by accident. Any sugestions out there?
2006-10-29 15:21:00 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
just being there for him is a wonderful start! Most parents like myself, just need someone to listen and also give us a break when possible and most of all we just need lots of support. You should get involved with a support group of other parents and get him there cause that has been the best thing that has ever happened for me. You will learn so much from other parents. Hang in there and just be there for him.
2006-10-30 13:56:35 · answer #1 · answered by Stephanie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Having a kid with autism is very hard, I have a son with Autism he's 8. It helps to read about autism and u can find help online for whatever problem u need...let's say one of the kids has a problem eating something you could ask a question online (search it on google or yahoo like: boy with autism doesn't eat pasta) and u can get help...there are also forums and blogs on yahoo for parents with children with autism.
If u need any specific help u can ask me ok.
2006-10-29 15:27:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm kind of confused about what you are asking. You don't know how to give him advice? Is he asking for advice? Is he doing things wrong so you feel he needs advice?
First, find out more about autism, particularly the kind his kids have. "Autism" can range from the totally non-verbal child who bangs his head on the wall to the Asperger's child who programs computers but can seem to look people in the eyes or interact with them on any emotional level.
Unless something terrably wrong is going on, I would refrain from giving advice until you've spent a good bit of time with his children & learned more about autism.
2006-10-29 15:31:39 · answer #3 · answered by Smart Kat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I noticed you did not say which end of the spectrum both kids were on. It tends to range in ability. However, just listening can be a big help. One thing I have noticed is reading a lot on a subject can help a lot in being there for him and his kids.
For books on the subject coming from research using Amazon.com on the subject:
* Autism Spectrum Disorders: The Complete Guide to Understanding Autism, Asperger's Syndrome, Pervasive Developmental Disorder, and Other ASDs
by Chantal Sicile-Kira, Temple Grandin. Published in 2004 by Perigree Trade. (Temple Grandin is always a wonderful read on the subject)
* 1001 Great Ideas for Teaching and Raising Children with Autism Spectrum Disorders by Veronica Zysk and Ellen Notbohm. Published by Future Horizons in 2004.
* Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew by Ellen Notbohm. Published by Future Horizons in 2006.
* Unraveling the Mystery of Autism and Pervasive Developmental Disorder: A Mother's Story of Research & Recovery by Karyn Seroussi. Published by in Broadway 2002.
* Playing, Laughing and Learning with Children on the Autism Spectrum: A Practical Resource of Play Ideas for Parents and Carers by Julia Moor. Published by Jessica Kingsley Publishers in 2002.
Excellent websites on the disorder:
http://www.specialchild.com/archives/dz-006.html
http://www.kidshealth.org/teen/school_jobs/school/autism.html
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/publicat/autism
http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/autism.html
http://www.autismspeaks.org/
http://www.autismtoday.com/
http://www.autisminfo.com/
http://www.nichcy.org/pubs/factshe/fs1txt.htm
2006-10-29 15:52:32 · answer #4 · answered by dawncs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just talk to him and ask him if there is anything you can do to help him with his kids and I'm sure he will let you know and tell him you are there for him and his children. Another just be there to listen to him he needs that too cause it isn't an easly thing to deal with. Don't worry about saying anything wrong if he loves you that much he will be happy to know you are taking a interest in helping.
2006-10-29 15:30:44 · answer #5 · answered by Blue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would do a web search on autism. You should be able to find out what it is, get a little understanding of what the kids are going through, as well as get tips on how to help your boyfriend with them.
2006-10-29 15:30:04 · answer #6 · answered by postcardtrader 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he would feel good if you asked him for suggestions on what books to read regarding how to care for autistic children. You can tell him that you do not expect to be their mother but would like to know more about how to parent an autistic child so you can understand better his job and so you do not do anything counterproductive.
Many autistic children are stuck to routines, its very important to them to keep them up. Do not invade the children's space. unless you know them for a long time and they have made it clear its ok. many autistic children do not like to be hugged or touched by other than their parents.
Just love them and they will forgive you if you make a mistake
2006-10-29 15:29:19 · answer #7 · answered by TrueSoul 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try reading up on autism. i'm sure there is some sort of group on the net that u could get some advice from people with hands on expierence. just don't be 2 pushy but do let him know that u are there 4 him & them & i'm sure things will b fine.
2006-10-29 15:32:15 · answer #8 · answered by glorydvine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well its better to stay away from married man no matter how good ur relation is..its not a easy way..it will never be easy..all u will find is pain till the end if u take this relation..well i suggest u to move ahead with a better single guy..with whom u can make a home with ur babies..i know breakin up is hard thing but dont mind me sayin this cuz this is fact..u might think u r goin to happy but the thing is tht u will never find happiness with him..i have experience so think about it
2006-10-29 15:51:59 · answer #9 · answered by Mandy Maklina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't interfer to the affair of your hubby with his kids from past married. Let him do how he finds ways to solve alone or treat his problem with his kids. Just wait when time is ripe he will ask your openion or advises. In this case he will know your concern too.
But if you eagerly advise him, he will thought you are a ****** b.tch and will get angry with you.
2006-10-29 15:28:00 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋