2006-10-29 14:35:44 · 9 answers · asked by Annemarie M 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
You should not enter into the children's lives until you have been dating him for a lengthy period of time. I hope he has been divorced for at least a years time. That's not to say you can't meet them after a few dates, but you should not be introduced as anything that could be construed as a possible mother substitute.
If this man has sons you don't want them getting the impression that women are things that come and go easily.
2006-10-29 14:39:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been with my fiance for 4 years now. We have a daughter together but he also has another daughter and she's 10. My best advice to you is to just be their friend. I remember the way his daughter and I broke the ice was by playing a game that she had made up. She was 5 back then. Try to remember that this might be difficult for them and they may not be ready to accept you.I don't know the children's ages of the man you're dating but I hope this is helpful. Just remember there's a lot of obstacles to getting serious with a man who has children. You also have to deal with the situation of their mother because she may not like her children being around another woman. Also, you might try to get interested in their interests. If they like a certain tv show maybe you could watch it with them or try to find out what ya'll have in common (same likes). My "stepdaughter" thinks I'm cool because we like a lot of the same things such as music.
2006-10-29 14:50:14 · answer #2 · answered by Priscilla I 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The ages of the children will determine the best way to handle your getting to know them. Little kids, you can just stop by, go out and rent movies, grab a pizza, be a friend and do age appropriate things with them.
Teens are going thru their own thing, so keep that in mind. Don't try to be their mother; don't discipline them, don't expect them to be fascinated with you in other words. If it's a girl, you can bond just by being a female,,,,makeup talk, compare cell phones, find something you have in common ( 80's music is hot again ).
If they see you are sincere and not going to try to change things, you will grow on them, give them time and space and let them come to you.
2006-10-29 14:44:24 · answer #3 · answered by Lola 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Couple years ago I dated a guy with nice kid, I was around alot, and he saw me as a friend of his dad. So when we broke up, I guess in his eyes I disappeared quietly in the background, the best way.
2006-10-29 15:32:27 · answer #4 · answered by zuegma1977 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's imp. to take it slowly, don't force it. if you are becoming serious, make sure you talk to the children and let them know how much you like/love there father and want to get to know them better.
2006-10-29 14:40:02 · answer #5 · answered by Katherine C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you realize you're in the LGBT section? Why are you posting this here?
2006-10-29 16:35:13 · answer #6 · answered by ByTheSea 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't even think about it.....the kids will end up saying,"you're not my mother, I don't have to listen to you."
You don't need that, do you ??
2006-10-29 14:49:59 · answer #7 · answered by MIGHTY MINNIE 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go slowly...be just a friend of their father's at first...
2006-10-29 14:44:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why on earth did you post this here?????
2006-10-29 14:44:14 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋